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Topics - Mangrove

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Apple Talk / Because I've not been around much lately...
« on: March 05, 2013, 09:05:22 pm »
...I brought you all the gift of British culture.

Apple Talk /, tech, website question
« on: January 09, 2013, 06:22:26 pm »
So, for the past few days, any time I click on, I get sent to a blank 'not found' page of death. However, I can post at  which, is a lot less catchy and memorable.

Is this problem unique to me or are other people experiencing it? My home computer doesn't seem to like the link neither does the one at work. They both have firefox on them, so I thought it might have something to do with that.

Any thoughts?

Many thanks,


Apple Talk / How to NOT be Metal...a primer by Dave Mustaine
« on: January 04, 2013, 04:17:27 pm »
Lesson #1

Make outrageous claim about Obama being a gun-grabbing nazi who conspired to create various mass shootings. (Bonus points for believing Rick Santorum had presidential qualities...)

Lesson # 2

Utilize social media to make an enormous fuss over nothing.

Please note the hysterically inconsistent: I really think that it sucks when people make false claims.." Also, please note well established career musician pleading poverty. Ok, so he's not making Justin Beiber money, but still, I can't help but think his plea of "We are all living in very tight financial times right now.." is a little disingenuous.

Lesson #3

Nothing quite says 'rock and roll rebel' quite like a Christmas Card competition. SRS BIZNESS

A posting on reads, "Although we were notified of the possible plagiarism by an anonymous fan in Brazil after the Christmas Day call was already placed, we are investigating this matter further."

Yes. Getting to the bottom of the fraudulent winner of a Megadeth art contest is the best use of Dave's critical faculties.

And that's how to NOT be metal. Tune in next week when I explain why Taylor Swift doesn't really play country music.

Or Kill Me / Mang's snarky letter to someone who 'had it coming'.
« on: November 15, 2012, 08:50:03 pm »
So, after 8 years Mrs Mang found a new job. Better money, annual pay raise, same benefits, less stress. She gave her notice on Monday and has been met with post-Romney levels of freak out and butthurt. And finally, I get to add my 2c. This is to the principal of her 3 (soon to be ex) bosses. Welcome editorial before I send this.

Dear J***,

By the time you read this, S**** will have departed for new opportunities. There's never a good time to deliver bad news, so I can appreciate that the prospect of losing a "valued" employee was a daunting one. Neither S**** nor I derive any pleasure from whatever difficulties that might arise for you. Nevertheless, it's important to recognize, as the Buddhists are wont to point out, that impermanence is the essence of our human condition. Nothing lasts forever whether its people, places, relationships, wealth, health or even nations - all are subject to the inexorable force of change. As such, S****'s time with you & *** was no exception. In 2004 right after we got married, taking the job with *** was the most appropriate course of action. In 2012 this was no longer the case. (Incidentally, S**** left her prior job because of the frankly, insane working conditions, not because of money. In fact, she took a substantial pay cut in order to escape that particular office and work for you, K** and, at that time, S**.)

In early 2007, another job opportunity opened up for her which also carried a better rate of pay. She discussed this offer with you but was met with considerable hostility and, oddly, the accusation that she was somehow disloyal. A disloyal person would have, surely, taken the money and run. This is not what she did however. Instead, she accepted a lesser counter-offer and stayed. Feeling genuine concern about the effects her leaving would have upon you and your practice, S**** chose to sacrifice easy security in favor of being 'the team player'.

Naturally, we were both dismayed that S****'s proven loyalty & dedication was rewarded with her hours being cut in, what I believe, to be a cowardly and backhanded manner. Instead of giving her fair consideration and consultation, she was palmed off to another rep (M***) like a piece of furniture. She was now the most qualified, experienced admin with the biggest workload and strangely enough, without meaningful compensation to show for it. Stranger still, was the expectation that somehow, she would perform all the same functions for the same money, in less time, with her attention split among three people.

S**** was hurt and disappointed by this development, as was I. However, she is a greatly patient and tolerant individual and accepted the situation stoically. In spite of her best intentions though, the demands placed upon her took a toll on her health. She worked at home, she worked on vacations. Go in early, stay late. She was even in the office checking things the week her daughter got married. It affected her physically and emotionally. As a married man, I hope you can relate to the concern I had for my wife and her well being.

Imagine our surprise then, returning from Italy in 2009, to be met with the indignity of being accused of 'talking too much to the other women', 'making too many mistakes' and 'not getting things done'. Most people think getting an office is a perk, but S**** got hers as punishment so that she could be isolated. (It should be noted that this change was handled in the same covert and thoughtless manner that resulted in her working for three planners.) Of course, she's human and makes mistakes, but I know that S**** is meticulous, rarely ever makes errors and when they do occur, she has always been able to correct them so that there has not been lasting or detrimental consequences. Bottom line - the cases went through, the clients were happy and you got paid.

We discussed this behaviour on many occasions and, most times, had to agree to disagree. I maintained, and still do, that the treatment meted out to her was unfair, unprofessional and predictably misogynist. To my frequent chagrin & frustration, she would always want to see the good in people and situations that I felt were not worthy of her time and attention. My constant refrain was that she deserved better. The great irony of it is I believe that neither, you, K** nor M*** would want your respective wives & daughters to be subject to these circumstances. I would hazard a guess that, if I were to show the same fundamental disrespect, there would be no end to the invective leveled at me. For all of your sakes, I sincerely hope your spouses and children are shown the common decency that I expect for my wife.

At this point, it should be apparent that S**** was never 'just about the money'. It was never just the dollar amount it was about all of the above and sheer apathy on the part of *** to take an interest in its people. That *** has lost some of its best administrators should be a cause for alarm and introspection though, I have a feeling it will not.

Since we're on the subject of money, if I may be so bold, I wish to make the following comments. It is my understanding that you informed S**** that "$7000 p/a wouldn't make a difference" in our lives. I am afraid that you are not in a position to know what would or would not make a difference to our lives. If you believe the sum to be so trivial, then can I assume that you would have been happy to raise her pay by the same amount?

Secondly, neither of us are in a position to dictate what other people's spouses should do. I do not answer to you, nor am I obliged to extend any sort of explanation. To clarify - I have a job. I am self employed and work in the field of healthcare. I am well trained, very experienced and have helped many people to heal, often in situations where conventional approaches have been less than satisfactory. I am solely responsible for every client I find and maintain. Every penny I make goes to the upkeep and well being of my family. Respectfully, my earnings are not your concern just as I have no knowledge or interest in your finances. I chose this career for the good it brings to the world, not because I thought I'd make a fast buck. If it was just about money, I'd go back to working in an office. The pettiness and inanity of office politics was, in part, what drove me to take a different path in the first place. Furthermore, it matters not in the slightest whether I am worth $1 or $100,000 a year. That is utterly immaterial to the fact that S**** deserved better for all the good will and effort she put in over the years. After all, it wasn't me signing her pay checks.

In closing, we all have our respective burdens to bear. Yours is finding a new assistant as S****'s is to get settled into a new job. You can blame her leaving on her, me, money, the women in the office etc. Hell, blame the President or Mercury being retrograde, it's of no odds to me. The truth is that she left because it was the most appropriate course of action for our life. I hope that you can understand and honour that, even though her actions may have inconvenienced you. It's not money, or spite or being 'under the influence of negativity in the office' it's simply this - negligence. Due care, attention and a sense of personal culpability would have yielded a much different outcome.

Best wishes for the future.

Yours sincerely


PS FYI. Some time back S**** wrote a letter outlining her concerns and grievances. You refused to believe she was even capable of writing such a letter. You were wrong. I had no hand in that as it was all her doing. People often underestimate her, it's not a mistake I make.

Hurricane Sandy is going to destroy all of the East Coast by Halloween. Take that Mayans! (sic).

If I disappear for days, it's likely because there's no power in most of CT, just like last year!

Apple Talk / Brit Spags! So Jim fixed it...
« on: October 23, 2012, 08:23:22 pm » be Britain's most prestigious & prodigious paedophile and die without getting caught.

I'm starting to wonder  (a) Whose head rolls next?
                                (b) If the Jonathan King & Gary Glitter episodes were not unrelated incidents.

Aneristic Illusions / Mangrove's Handy Dandy Pocket Election Lexicon
« on: October 08, 2012, 04:34:38 pm »
It's Election season here in the US which means that the amount of buzzwords and platitudinous bullshit will increase exponentially over the course of this month. So, here's a handy dandy guide to help you translate election commentary and debates. This is just to get you started. Feel free to add or update definitions.

Family Values = Homophobia.

Pro-Life = Peculiar form of misogyny with a special emphasis on women's reproductive anatomy.

Wall Street = Our corporate paymaster.

Main Street = The rest of you business owning schlubs.

The Middle Class = Schlubs in general.

Fiscal Responsibility = The rape and pillage of the social safety net.

Entitlement Programs = Perjorative term for the social safety net that working people pay into in the hope of never having to use it on the basis that letting the sick, elderly & unemployed free-fall into poverty is a 'dick move'. (see 'Fiscal Responsibility')

Socialism = Meaningless buzzword bandied about by Conservatives as an insult. Often used to conflate civic duty with Communism.

The Founding Fathers = A group of intelligent, educated, 18th century, Enlightenment era, deist, Liberal men who sought to establish an alternative to European monarchism. For some reason, the FF's are confused with The Pilgrim Fathers. (see below)

The Pilgrim Fathers = Paranoid, religious, zealots escaping greatly overstated religious persecution. Their beliefs that the Old World was filled with too many Catholics, Witches & Jews and that the Church of England was too lenient on same, lead them to hiring ships and leaving. Much to the great relief of Western Europe and to the great chagrin of the Native Americans.   

The American People = Implies all American citizens but depends on who uses it. When used by conservatives it excludes non-whites, homosexuals, liberals, non-Christians & the poor.

Middle America = aka The American People who are not part of the East/West coast liberal elite.

Real America = As opposed to Fake America? Also depends on who uses it. Generally refers to any part of the country that thinks Sarah Palin is a good speaker.

Liberal Elite = Conservative term for people who value literacy, numeracy, science etc.

The Constitution = Political document drafted by the Founding Fathers. Often mistaken for a religious scripture written by the Pilgrim Fathers.

The Declaration of Independence = Ditto.

Think for Yourself, Schmuck! / Critical Mass America (tm)
« on: September 12, 2012, 09:00:02 pm »
How do you know you're in Critical Mass America? When something happens that's soooo American, that the laws of reality become distorted.

Exhibit A:

Take a sugary snack. Combine it with another sugary snack. Then release it to coincide with a Hallmark holiday that's aimed at largely at children during a healthcare crisis of jeuvenile obesity.

Exhibit B:

Egyptian immigrant comes to America to find opportunity....the opportunity to look like Popeye.

Apple Talk / Kai - Bug Questions!
« on: July 11, 2012, 08:54:53 pm »
This is something really stupid, but I had to ask.

So, outside one of our bedroom windows, some funnel web spiders have taken residence. Every now and then, I like to watch what they're up too. Often, nothing much but recently, I got to see something I've never seen up close before. Some flying beastie (that looked all the world like a very small wasp(?) got himself caught in the web.

Now, he was doing all his best to get the hell out because the resident spider was nearby. The spider ran out and actually circled his prey numerous times. Then it'd run back and then run out again, do a few victory laps and then return to his corner. There was a really dramatic scene whereby the spider stood over the wasp and had one leg poised very high above like he was about to  bitch slap his would-be meal from a great height.

Later on, when I revisited the scene, the wasp was dead and all of it's waspy goodness had been sucked out.

This got me thinking. Spiders have been making sticky webs for a gazillion years. Other creatures have been sticking to said webs for gazillions of years. Has our trusty friend, evolved insects that either are:

a) impervious to spider stickiness, in which case they can walk off? After all, spiders can, so it makes sense that some other creature could.

b) developed some other anti-spider web measure(s)?

I would have thought "not getting stuck in a web and dying" would qualify as suitable 'environmental pressure' to cheat the spiders out of a meal.

Many thanks,


Apple Talk / Mangrove and the absence thereof
« on: March 28, 2012, 09:30:12 pm »
Here's why I haven't been posting as much.

It's not that I don't have the time. I have plenty of time. In fact, I have too much time which is why I don't post often. Because I'm self employed, I have to use my brain to build my business. Mrs Mang' & I squeak by financially most of the time, so it's really way more important that I find clients and establish my practice because she works way too hard for too little money from total assholes. Until we find other jobs and/or other sources of income (we're both actively working on that), we just get on with being held to ransom because I like making mortgage payments and I like the fact that this is the only way we can afford healthcare. It won't always be that way, but right now, it IS.

Secondly, since 2007, we've been dealing with the hilarious family game called 'living with a junky'. The drugs, the withdrawal, the relapses (oh the relapses!) ,the police interviews, doctor appointments, court appointments, taking time out of your day to find out which pawn shop your jewelry is in. The lies, the denial, the arguments, the weird behaviors, the lack of trust, the siege mentality of being at home, the endless fucking discussions with friends/family/work mates....

Well, turns out all of this is very time consuming and not very interesting either.  Which is precisely why until today, I have not talked about this at PD because I really didn't see any good coming from it. So this is probably the only post where I'll mention it. Unless something significant and newsworthy happens, that's it. Just so everyone knows and wonders why my creative energies have not been in Komedy Kabbalah of late.

As for creative things, I did manage to unplug a serious creative block that kept me from bothering with music for over a decade. Back to playing guitar again regularly. [Incidentally, I have found a positive purpose arising out of shows like American Idol. The moment I hear or see it on tv I think "Cool, now I can spend the next 1-2 hours working on my own shit rather than listen to people I don't care about." ]

When I first joined PD, I had a really stupid, stressful but stable job. Now I have a really cool job that I love but where the income stream is unreliable. I answer to pretty much no one but myself, but that also means the sole responsibility of success or failure falls squarely on my head. I've got a lot of study, lots of practice and a shit load of marketing to do. Not to mention, a lot of soul searching too. Perhaps when my work calendar is a lot more full, then I'll have the time to engage with what's going on here. But right now, it's something I can only briefly glance at.

I'm still around but horribly out of the loop and that's how it has to be right now.

Until then, relax - it's only the internet.


Apple Talk / SSOOKN's Official statement concerning the Open Bar
« on: March 28, 2012, 09:11:21 pm »
I stopped posting regularly on PD before it was cool.  8)

Seriously though, here's a few thoughts....

The amount of discourse about the Open Bar thread would be a source of constant amazement to me if I logged on regularly enough. When it was active, it produced a variety of responses. Some avoided it entirely, some thought it was irritating but had to post in it anyway, some people enjoyed it for whatever reasons they had. I don't know what they were or care for that matter.

I started the very first OB thread back in 2004 not long after I signed up for PD. I think ECH (under his magnificent original moniker, Turd Ferguson!) joined about the same week I did or I joined right after him...anyways, it was a long time ago. The original OB thread was simply a place of make believe and silliness. That's it. I really didn't expect it to be sustained for as long as it did. Hell, even I stopped posting in it regularly years before it got cancelled.

I also didn't expect that it would get copied by other forums. When Aini and Eric(?) went off and did their own forum, they included a bar. When EB&G was formed, they also had a bar thread and, I wouldn't be entirely surprised if their are other forums out there(discordian or otherwise), somewhere that did likewise. And bully for them because it makes no difference to me at all.

The original OB thread was awash with what was then called 'cookies & pie' discordianism though people might now call it Pinealism or whatever. PD took on a different vibe in 2006 onwards with the advent of the BIP project and 'cookies & pie' posting went seriously out of vogue and posters partial to it either dropped it and continued to stay or they got 'the horrors' and went somewhere else.

When the OB began, there was barely Facebook (if at all). Back in 2004 many people I knew were on a UK site called 'Friends Reunited' so they could connect with their school mates.(Can't think of anything I wanted to do less.) I don't know if the term 'blogosphere' had been coined at that time or not, but I don't remember hearing it. Seems that pre-facebook people had Livejournal (lol) or some shit like that.

Over time, probably with the exponential expansion in both blogs and FB, the Open Bar took on that colouring. But really, it was just a gag. It was near Xmas 2004 and I felt like sharing some good cheer. That was it.

When I saw people baying for the demise of a thread, it struck me as odd. As odd as it would be for anyone to campaign for it being saved. It was odd that that it was considered instrumental in a decline in post volume and quality. It's odd that after deleting it, there's some sentiment that the 'fluff buffer zone' had been comprised allowing more trivial posting to spill into other areas. It's all a bit ODD.

The OB thread was only ever a reflection of the people posting in it at any given time. It changed because the posters changed. Posters came and went and some of the same posters stayed but they changed their minds.

The OB probably didn't add or detract anything from the forum. It was ONE SINGLE THREAD. All the posts in any thread come from your brain and onto the computer via your fingers. So, check your heads if there's any questions about post quality. As I said, it was a mirror - don't blame the mirror. Whether it stays up or gets smashed or people celebrate or lament it, it really doesn't amount to anything.

It was just a cheeky joke thread (and alt account) that got a lot of mileage. End of story.

It's ok, it's only the internet.

Apple Talk / SSOOKN Exclusive for Dok Howl....
« on: October 20, 2011, 08:10:42 pm »
....What Taylor Swift sounds like without auto-tune!

Apple Talk / It's Friday....this can mean only one thing...
« on: August 26, 2011, 05:15:03 pm »
....pop-culture atrocities of the 80s  :lulz:

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