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Well, you're going to have to drop the obligatory delorian reference, as well as 88mph getting in there somehow.

I was going to! I thought it might be too much, but the teacher will probably just be happy I chilled out on the Rambo shit.

You're line is too damn good. Is is plagiarizer if I take it?

I should also probably note that there is no time machine in this story. I'm just really in the mood to watch Back to the Future.
It's a metaphor.

So far, you've pretty much got the reader hooked in.  You're gonna really have to drive your point home, because the rest of the paper has to live up to and support that opening paragraph.

Fuck. I was hoping the conspiracy twist could buy me a page or two while the reader tries to figure out what the fuck I'm talking about.

Sherman Alexie usually gives you something weird enough to riff on, though.

No, I already picked: The Swimmer
That's the paper.
I think I'm gunna get real weird with it.

I hope everyone watched Blazing Saddles yesterday to honor his spirit.
He's punching angels' horses now.

Letting the Days Go by:
John Cheever's warnings against time travel
"And you may find yourself living in a shotgun shack,
and you may find yourself in another part of the world,
and you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile,
and you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife,
and you may ask yourself, 'well, how did I get here?'"
-Talking Heads, "Once in a Lifetime"
   "What am I doing with my life? How did it all come to this? I'm how old now?" These are questions that haunt many people, but the most common times for this line of questioning are old age and mid-life. Mid-life was right where John Cheever was when he wrote "The Swimmer." In the story the readers watch as Neddy Merrill swims through time, oblivious to its passing. He travels in a time machine made of denial, fueled by alcohol and petty pursuits. Cheever has made this trip. In his early forties, John Cheever was a severe alcoholic, he was having money troubles, and his career had not blossomed as he had hoped. All this combined with a failing marriage and you have the recipe for a mid-life crisis. This story was Cheever's suicide note, which he would commit 30 short years later by giving himself cancer.

Ok guys, I wasn't going to log in today until I did my work, but I need help now.
Please read the opening to my paper. Have I gone off the rails, or is this the right direction?
:davidbyrne:

Not even sure why you'd even consider it.

Woah, woah. Fuck that. Going was never an option. But when asked by my girlfriend my response was "Tell her to go fuck herself!" I got that look I get when I'm being too much like me. They are her friends, not mine.
The assault option is for the next time I see them.

Fun fact: my girlfriend lurks and posts here now. If you're reading this, well, battery is up by 5 votes. Consider the legal ramifications before inviting people over here.

I'm not feeling Joey Gladstone right now.

Suggest a new picture.

With that size of deployment, I'm guessing it's going to be a rapid response team to handle attacks on US embassies.

See:  Barn door, horses gone.

This and this.

"How do we prepare for this thing that already happened?"

I did that after the USS Cole. "Fuck, maybe we should arm these vitals vessels with some defense from that thing that terrorists always do!" That's what Marines are for. "Tip of the spear," they called us.
"After the fac,t" we were.

This is why I support dumb-shaming.

If someone thinks fucking Brazil is in Asia (true story) it is not considered overly rude to exclaim some snarky in disbelief.

IF you don't understand it, get on my level. I will do the same if I am being dumb.

So everyone under 18, SHUT THE FUCK UP.

What's wrong with this idea?
I'm well over 18.

4.  If I see one more person that I used to respect LIKING WalMart or fucking Target or Goddamn Appleby's, I cannot be held responsible for my actions. 

"Obama steals toys!"

I made this move.
Good move.
I only wish I had better documented my time there.

Today was judgement day, and it was decided:
I will be doing a 15 minute presentation on the Constitution Party.

I am now taking requests.
Do I act sarcastic and critical?
Do I pretend to support them (my teacher is fairly blatantly liberal, and I'm doing horribly in this class)?
Magic trick (I got a 76 on the last one about Military Dictatorships; I need to up the WOW! FactoR!!!!1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ILdFD-VShJM

Said individual made me watch that piece of shit.

And made fun of my poor social skills with rude remarks like "Oh, it's finally going to leave the cave!?

And fuck a haunted house.