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The Strange Misadventures of Skull Kid

Started by ThatGreenGentleman, April 13, 2013, 08:40:46 AM

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ThatGreenGentleman

     This is no story of a hero nor a villain, but rather of a person who just happened to be in all the wrong places at the right time. This person was not a valiant knight who rode into battle on horseback. This person was also not an evil necromancer who stood atop a tower, sending forth an army of undead. The point is is that this person was neither of those things because that would be silly and completely out of place, and you should feel ashamed for thinking this would be about knights or wizards. I mean really, do you take this for some sort of nonsense about swords being stuck in a rock? Where was I? Oh yes, as I was saying before you so rudely interrupted, this story is about a person whose name is Skull Kid, and he is not good or evil but he tries to do what he sees as right but that just leads him into a very steep downward spiral. Where should we start? At the end and work backwards? No, that will never do and I'll only confuse myself... Perhaps in the middle? That won't work either because that will confuse both you and I. The beginning you say? Why yes, that should work nicely. And here I thought you only came up with foolish ideas, maybe you'll prove yourself to not be a complete fool before the story is over.

     It was a warm summer day in the desert state of Arizona when this all began. An elderly couple, Maria and Juan, lived far out in the desert by themselves. Maria and Juan had been married for 50 years and all of their children had died before they could have children of their own. Sometimes Maria would forget this and wonder when Antonio, their oldest, would settle down with someone before the painful truth would rear its ugly head and her heart would grow heavy with sadness. Juan would drown his sorrows if he could, but the current state of his liver prevented him from doing so. They remained as happy as they could, Juan would tend to the small number of cattle they had and Maria would take long walks through the desert. Each day Maria would look to the sky during her walk and think "Please, send someone to take away our sorrow." Each day she got no reply.

     One day, however, she got a reply (assuming there was someone who actually heard her request). Maria was on a walk and had gotten to the forked tree that had a strange face shaped growth on it (it was positively grotesque for it looked contorted with rage and rather ugly) when a strange black door appeared. It was a plain door with an ordinary brass handle, in fact so unremarkable was this door that you wouldn't have given a second glance if not for the fact that it was standing up perfectly straight and had not been there before. Curious, the elderly Maria approached the black door cautiously before rapping her knuckles against three times then stepping back. The door swung open and out flew a young lad with an impish face which appeared to be covered in black and white makeup to make his face look like a skull. In fact, his whole body seemed to be covered in makeup to make him look like a skeleton. A short round man, who had thrown the lad out the door, muttered under his breath and closed the door behind him with a loud thud and then the black door was gone.

     Maria went to the boy to make sure he was alright and asked his name. The boy looked at her with a blank expression and merely replied with "Skull Kid." She asked him what happened and he seemed to struggle with forming words much less sentences. She smiled a wrinkled smile and ruffled his white hair, helped him to his feet, and took him back to her and Juan's home.

    Juan was shocked by the story Maria told of how Skull Kid had been thrown through a black door that led to nowhere, though both Maria and Juan were surprised to find out that what they thought was makeup was actually how Skull Kid's skin was naturally. Though his skin was strange, Skull Kid brightened Maria and Juan's lives immensely. Juan taught Skull Kid how to sing and play guitar while Maria taught him to read and write. Sometimes the elderly couple called would call him Antonio or Pedro by mistake and sadness would fill their hearts, but only momentarily. With each passing day Skull Kid grew taller and outgrew his clothes and the only clothing Maria could find for him was Juan's old mariachi outfit. The day Maria gave Skull Kid the mariachi clothing, she knew it was time for him to go out in the world, that they couldn't just keep him at their small ranch. With heavy hearts but sincere smiles, the elderly couple bid farewell to the strange boy at a bus stop not far from their house. As Skull Kid boarded the bus, all he took with him was the mariachi clothes he wore and the old guitar Juan gave him. Those were the only things he took with him to Tucson, for they were the only things he would need.

   End of part 1.
As a gentleman, it is my duty to wear top-hats.

Anna Mae Bollocks

I like this already. It feels kind of mythic, like Native stories.
Keep it going!  :)
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

AFK

Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


ThatGreenGentleman

#4
    Today was not a good day for Carlos Oscar Yote. It was a worse day for the corpse that laid on the hardwood flooring. Carlos sighed and with bloody hands retrieved a cigarette from his coat pocket. "You know it's a dumb idea to try and attack me, Bernard." The corpse on the ground, Bernard Ulysses Ffalo, grunted and slowly got up from the ground. Now standing on swaying legs he spat blood, "You damn trickster. I oughta report you to the Lady, we'll see how confident you are then!" Carlos only grinned, showing off wolfish teeth. "You're just mad because you lost your herd to Benjamin. You've turned bitter and sour, the Lady will not listen to you and you know it." Bernard threw a punch at him. Carlos side stepped the attack and grabbed a handful of Bernard's dark curling hair and yanked him backwards until the larger man fell back to the floor. "You need to stop ruining my floors and wasting my time," Carlos said calmly as he lit his cigarette. "I have some business to attend to, so I want the blood cleaned up and you gone by the time I get back." Carlos left his house, and a cursing Bernard, behind and walked down the street with bloody hands and still wearing a blood spattered suit.

     He went to his friend's bar. It was a small bar, but a well known one, run by Francine Ox, who had reddish brown hair and dark cunning eyes. Francine was pleased to see him, as she always was, and was telling him about this strange kid who had come into Tucson on a bus when said kid came flying through the doorway that led to some rooms (Francine's bar was also a small hotel). "What the hell do you think you're doing?" Francine yelled at the bear of a man who had thrown the strange kid. "This asshole came bargin' in on me and my girl," the angry man answered. The kid's reply was, "The door was black so I thought it was my way home." This only made the large man even angrier and ran towards the kid. Before anyone could so much as breathe, the kid swung his guitar and hit the man straight in the face with it, breaking the man's nose. The kid's face was completely blank of expression, as if none of this seemed important. Carlos was impressed. Francine broke it up and sent the man back to his room while scolding the kid and pointing towards the stage. The kid nodded and headed towards it.

     Francine went back behind the bar to make some drinks. "So who's the kid, Franny?" She looked up at Carlos. "Introduced himself as Skull Kid. Seemed pretty confused when he got into town. Said he was looking for a black door that's supposed to take him home. I noticed he had a guitar and gave him a job of playing here until he finds his door." Carlos tugged lightly at his short hair, a frown on his face. "You know that whole black door business makes him sound crazy. Especially with all that makeup he has on." Francine smiled at him like there was a joke he wasn't in on. "He's not crazy. And that's not makeup." Her friend looked confused. "So it's a tattoo?" Franny made a buzzing noise to indicate that Carlos was wrong. "Not a tattoo. It's how his skin looks naturally." Carlos' face looked like a cross between horrified and amazed. "How?" She looked at her friend. "From what I gather, even though he looks human he isn't. He's just like us." He looked at her incredulously. "He can't be like us, the Lady would've told us if there was another." Francine looked at him sadly, as if he was a child who just wasn't understanding. "He is like us, but he's not from here. That's why we never heard anything about him from the Lady." Silence fell over the two, but not for long because Skull Kid stepped up to the microphone, guitar in hand, and began to sing.

   End of part 2.
As a gentleman, it is my duty to wear top-hats.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


ThatGreenGentleman

     Devils nor saints could save you from him; he'd eat you alive if you so much as looked at him wrong. Standing over seven feet tall and dressed like a cowboy with no sense of color other than black and close enough to black. Under the collar of his button up shirt and leather vest was a skeleton's hand with an eye embedded at the wrist, as if it were a neck tie, so as to unnerve those who would even dare to think of double crossing him. His name was Greyson, and he looked like someone morphed two Clint Eastwoods together. His black boots crunched the pebbles on the ground as he walked, his spurs clinking with each step he took, towards a sobbing young girl who was trying to wake her dead mother. Greyson knelt down in front of the girl and handed her the small bear she had dropped hours earlier. She quieted down a bit before he picked her up and took her to see the Lady. Normally he was never this kind to anyone, but he always had a soft spot for kids.

     The Lady was not pleased to hear of the death of Camilla Stag, the dead mother of the weeping child in Greyson's arms. "Who did this? Who would DARE to step into my city with the intent of murder?" Greyson handed the girl to one of the maids so the the girl would not hear of what was to be said. She was too young to know of this. "We don't know. We think it might be because of the mother." The Lady's face turned red with frustration. "This is why I was so against Samuel Stag wedding a human! Where is he? I want him brought here, now." Greyson knew what would happen when he answered, but he had to speak or the damage would be worse. "Samuel Stag is dead, my Lady. He died protecting his wife and child." The Lady glared at him and opened her mouth to shriek with rage, but the only noise that came out was the sound of cars crashing and metal crushing upon impact. Once she closed her mouth she had a look of defiance on her face. She knew he hated it when she caused accidents as it increased his already overflowing work load. Greyson wondered for a moment about how the Lady could've turned out this way. He was so careful about how he she was raised. She used to be happy and gentle when she was a girl, but now that she had grown she had become cold and spiteful. No wonder almost no one came to her court anymore. He was dragged out of his thoughts when the Lady barked an order at him. "Take care of the mess and find out who killed Samuel Stag. If anyone else is killed let me know immediately." Greyson nodded before exiting through a red door. The Lady sat upon her throne, simmering in rage.

     Carlos had no idea how he got roped into housing Skull Kid. Probably because Franny was clever and tricked him into it. She was almost as good a trickster as he was and it was always a surprise when she tricked him and got away with it. Carlos tugged lightly at his hair, like he always did when he was nervous or pouting because something didn't go his way, and continued walking home with Skull Kid trailing behind him. Something just wasn't sitting right with him. Why would Franny practically order him to not tell the Lady about the kid? Not like he would anyway, since he hadn't been to the Lady's court unless he summoned. Carlos hated not being in the loop of information. He's the Trickster, he's supposed to know all of the dirty secrets and going ons of the court. So what was going on?

     When they entered Carlos' house the blood was gone as well as Bernard, no doubt that he would return.  "You'll be sleeping on the couch. You can watch TV if you want. There's food in the fridge if you want. I'm heading to bed. Don't wake me up unless it's an emergency." Then Carlos was trudging upstairs. He awoke the next morning to a complete mess of the kitchen and Skull Kid watching TV.

     Francine was awoken to her phone ringing angrily in her ear. "Hello?" The voice on the other end was a hysterical Carlos. "You mad woman! You knew this would happen didn't you? You knew and you sent him to make my house into a disaster area." Francine sighed. "What the fuck are you talking about?"
"He doesn't sleep at all apparently, so he practically destroyed my kitchen by eating everything! Somehow he grew taller! I don't even know how that's possible. He's almost as tall as Greyson now! And I don't know if it was something he ate but he drew all over the walls and wrote in some language that doesn't even exist. I should know, I fucking googled it and nothing came up except some really questionable websites. Now he's in some sort of weird TV coma because he can't stop staring at it and doesn't respond at all."
"Did you  try turning the TV off?"
"Yes but he almost ripped my hand off. Do you know how long it takes to grow another hand? A week, Franny. I was dangerously close to spending an entire week regrowing my hand because Skull Kid here can't seem to stop watching TV."
Francine sighed and said she would be over shortly.

     When she got there it was really freaky. Skull Kid was on the couch, staring intently at the TV. His eyes seemed to be whiter than usual, if that was even possible. And Carlos was right, Skull Kid had written on the walls in a language that did not exist and he had apparently grown several inches since yesterday. Carlos was still hysterical, but he was keeping quiet. Francine used the button on the TV rather than the remote to turn it off. That seemed to do the trick because as soon as it was off he seemed to snap out of it. "Skull Kid, what happened?" Francine asked. He blinked a few times, confusion written on his face. "I... I ate food from the fridge and then I don't really remember what happened after that..." Francine looked at the wall behind him and asked, "What does this say?" Skull Kid looked behind him, and as he read guilt seemed to grow on his face. "It says 'I'm sorry, so sorry, please take me home, I'll never do disobey you again.'" When he was done his gaze turned to the floor. Carlos finally spoke since Francine arrived. "What is your home, exactly." Without looking up, Skull Kid replied. "Hell."

   End of part 3.
As a gentleman, it is my duty to wear top-hats.

ThatGreenGentleman

     Carlos and Franny sat next to Skull Kid and waited for him to elaborate on what he meant by Hell. They waited for what seemed like hours, but what was really only 15 minutes, all the while finally noticing the lack of rise and falling to his chest. It seemed that he didn't need breathe at all, just like he didn't need to sleep. He really wasn't human, but he wasn't like Carlos or Franny either, because even they needed to sleep and breathe. Skull Kid cleared his throat and began to tell them of his home.
     "I may have said my home was Hell, but it isn't. To the people of your world it would certainly seem like the Hell they preach of, yet it is far from it. My home is a place of nightmares and garish colors and the people are not living but they're not dead, they just simply are. Perhaps it is because of their state of existence that has made most of them mad, at least according to this world's view if they ever saw my world. Having spent so much time here even I think of my home as some sort of cruel place where before I thought it normal. But it wasn't always like that, at least I think it wasn't... I remember, back hundreds of years to when I first began to exist, it used to be somewhat happy, and not quite so twisted, but that was so long ago I don't even know if it was really like that."
     "How did you end up here?" Franny asked quietly.
     "I... I did something that was inexcusable in the eyes of someone who I was once close to. She used to be so kind, but then he got to her. Then she wasn't kind anymore. She rose to power and then things became dark and cold, and home wasn't home anymore. Everything was terrifying and so cold and rivers turned red and sticky and trees became soft with flesh and sharp teeth, I remember the sharp teeth. She didn't look like herself anymore and I kept away. Then she requested my presence and everything fell apart, I was stupid and she was bitter and cruel. She banished me through the black door and Maria found me." His blank face seemed to change slightly, fondness tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Maria and Juan took care of me and everything was warm and safe. I forgot about the black door for a while, until I came here." The fondness fled from his face quicker than people fleeing from a hurricane. He looked at Carlos and said, "Sorry about scaring you, there aren't any TV's where I come from and rightly so. The signals were messing with my head." Skull Kid then got up from the couch, shrugged on his mariachi jacket, grabbed his guitar and left for a while in search of his black door.
     "I hope he doesn't run into Greyson, or else he'll end up meeting a grisly end by the Lady," Carlos practically whispered. "I'm beginning to like the little weirdo."

     Greyson was absolutely furious. A 10 car pile up all because the Lady was angry because he didn't know who had killed Stag and his human wife. It took him hours to sort out whose soul belonged to who and where they were to be sent off to. A lot of them had been claimed by a bruja so he had to go get them back before the bruja ate them. Greyson had taken to walking around Tucson to calm himself when he was angry like he was now, just walking aimlessly. Until he bumped into someone. It was a person, not a man yet not a boy, who had strange skeletal patterns on his skin and was wearing a mariachi outfit. Greyson scowled at him until he caught a scent he never thought he would have to encounter ever again. Panic, something he was not use to, gripped him fiercely. He grabbed him by his arm and bit out, "What are you doing here? I thought your Ruler understood to never send outcasts here again." Skull Kid looked up at the strange man but said nothing. Greyson scowled and said, "I'm taking you to the Lady and getting to the bottom of this." With a snap of his fingers a nearby blue door turned red and Greyson dragged Skull Kid through it.

   End of part 4.
As a gentleman, it is my duty to wear top-hats.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

This is an amazing story... I really love this one, a lot.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


ThatGreenGentleman

   A heavy fog was all around him, as if it were a veil to keep him blind. He could feel mud and grass in between his toes and knew immediately where he was. "The marshlands," he whispered to himself. Carefully tugging his legs free from the mud's embrace he began to walk. As he went deeper into the marshlands the fog was still thick and the mud began to rise up to his stomach, but he kept going. After getting stuck a couple of times, he found what he was looking for, though he didn't know why he had been. A small fire in the distance and a house on stilts keeping it out of the mud. The mud began to recede as he climbed up the steps to the house on stilts. He knocked once, twice, three times and the door swung open to reveal an old wrinkled woman whose skin was very dark. She smiled up at him and invited him in. She sat him down at an old wooden table and gave him a bowl filled with murky liquid and questionable ingredients.

     "What brings you all the way out here to the marshlands, ancient one?" she asked him as she went over to a large cauldron, stirring what was highly likely the same murky liquid with questionable ingredients.
     "I do not know," he said quietly, hand reaching up to the back of his head to rub at the soreness he felt. "And I am not ancient, I haven't been around for even 20 years." The old woman let out a hearty laugh which seemed to make the house on stilts shake.
     "Perhaps where you're from you are young, but where you are now, their time flows differently, so there you are ancient. You're even older than their gods. You were born long before them and you'll die long after they do. You'll live long enough to see the fall of their civilizations, to see them scramble around to survive, to see them build anew. You'll live long enough to see the last star flicker out of existence." As soon as the last sentence slipped from her mouth, he understood what she meant. She turned to look at him, and he noticed for the first time, she opened her eyes. Two black voids where her eyes should be bored right into him. "You will see the end of your people. You will see the end of all things, ancient one."
     "Stop calling me that."
     "I could call you by your other names, if you would prefer that, though ancient one is probably the kindest one," she said as she closed her eyes and returned to stirring the cauldron. "Now drink your soup, Nighttime Fear." He glared at the back of her head as he lifted the bowl to his lips and drank. As soon as all of it was gone he immediately regretted drinking it. Everything began to spin and swirl and he felt mud between his toes again. He felt sick. Attempting to stand was a bad idea too, for as soon he tried he pitched forward into the mud and was swallowed whole, as the old woman laughed.


   Skull Kid's eyes flew open as the soreness in the back of his head began to throb. Staying absolutely still, his eyes flicked all over the room he was in. The walls and floor were gray stone and there were no windows. There was only a door and its color did not matter because it was not black.

   Carlos Oscar Yote was not happy at the moment. He had business to take care of, people to trick, but the Lady was calling Court, so that meant everyone had to show up. Which also meant he had to go in his original form, just like everyone else. He remembered that rule as he was walking down the pillared hallway of the Lady's place, and one moment, he was Carlos Oscar Yote, a simple man of possibly Hispanic background in a suit, then another moment passed by and he was Coyote the Trickster. Continuing on his way on four feet this time, he wondered what could possibly be so important that the Lady would call Court. As he got closer to the Court, he saw the others. There was Fox and Buffalo (and the younger Buffalo who stole the herd) and Whale, etc. Coyote fell into step with Fox and whispered, "Why have we been summoned?" Fox looked at him with surprise before replying with "I don't know, I thought you knew, cousin." Dread settled in his stomach, for if not even Fox knew what was going on, then it couldn't possibly be anything good.

   In the Courtroom, after everyone had taken their seats, the Lady, who sat at the front, stood and smiled. It was the kind of smile you see when a predator knows its prey can't escape. "I know you're all very busy, so I'll keep this short." Her smile fell and a stern look replaced it. "As some of you may know, Stag is dead, as is his human wife. His half-breed will most likely take his place." The sounds of gasps and murmurs filled the room momentarily before it quieted down so the Lady could continue. Her red heels clicked as she slowly descended the stairs from her chair down to the pit. "Not only has Stag been killed, but we also have a guest from the other side. An Outcast." The Lady stopped on the last step as the floor of the pit parted and a platform began to rise from the darkness, revealing a confused looking Skull Kid. The Lady stepped onto the pit's floor and walked up to Skull Kid. She began to walk in a predatory circle around him. "An Outcast, who may have killed Stag." The room went deathly silent.

End of part 5.
As a gentleman, it is my duty to wear top-hats.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Anna Mae Bollocks

Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.

Weevil-Infested Badfun Wrongsex Referee From The 9th Earth
Slick and Deranged Wombat of Manhood Questioning
Hulking Dormouse of Lust and DESPAIRâ„¢
Gatling Geyser of Rainbow AIDS

"The only way we can ever change anything is to look in the mirror and find no enemy." - Akala  'Find No Enemy'.

ThatGreenGentleman

   "No light, no light, no light..." He was growing tired of this chanting that could be heard close by. They were up to something again, something that was most likely stupid and savage. Rubbing his eyes in exasperation, he rose from his seat and strode down the grassy hill towards the chanting. Soon enough the beings that were the source of the chanting came into view. They were small, barely three feet high, and they looked malnourished and their skin was a deep blue. He came closer and closer to them still, until their inky black eyes were fixed upon him and they began to clack their blood stained teeth together, creating a chittering sound.

   "Quit it with the chanting, you won't summon your Lord. He's been dead for a long time now, so leave," he said and turned on his heel. He stopped when one of them spoke. They never spoke except to chant, so it was appropriate that a chill ran up his spine.

   "We summon our Lord for when he fell you grew from his corpse, Nighttime Fear. So it is only we right that we wish for him to come back from the Land of the Dead. You sit upon his throne yet do nothing to live up to his name." They went back making their chittering noises and formed their circle once more and began to chant. He watched them for a while, until they brought out a screaming child. He felt sick because he knew what they were about to do; they were going to eat it alive. He walked away as fast as he could before the sounds of ripping flesh could reach his ears. Why they thought eating a creature alive would bring back their Lord, no one knew. He fled from the darkness towards her, towards the one who could chase his fears away.

   She welcomed the him into her arms and cooed at him like the child he was. She knew he hated having to live in the old Lord's realm, but he had no choice since he sprung from his bones. There it was cold and dark, but here, where she resided, it was warm and bright. She wished she could find a way to send him away from that, but there was none that was known. The best she could do at the moment was comfort the child King of the old Lord's realm and hope that someday, she would be able to send him far, far away from this...


   Coyote and Fox knew what was going to happen next. Their peers were going to demand Skull Kid's blood, whether or not he was the one who killed Stag. The fact that the Lady suggested that it might've been him would be enough to sway their emotions. They had to act fast, or it could mean the end of Skull Kid. Fox immediately spoke up, asking questions so as to distract the Lady long enough for Coyote to sneak his way down to the pit. Skull Kid quickly glanced at Coyote, but then focused his gaze back onto the Lady. She was an enemy and you never keep your eyes off of your enemy long unless you want wish to die. Coyote whispered to him, "We can get you out of here, but you're going to need your guitar to do it. Where is it?" Skull Kid slightly inclined his head over to Greyson, who stood by the Lady's throne in the shadows. Coyote cursed under his breath. Of fucking course Greyson would have it. He must've found out somehow about what had happened at the bar on Skull Kid's first night playing there. Coyote crawled out of the pit, thankfully no one noticed as they were too caught up in Fox's debate with the Lady over what should be done and whatnot.

   Sneaking up on Greyson is impossible. Coyote knew that and yet he still tried. As soon as he touched the guitar with his paw, Greyson grabbed him by his scruff and said in a low voice, "What do you think you're doing?" Coyote knew it was time for some serious begging. "Greyson, please, I need that guitar. It's the only way to get the kid out of here. He didn't kill Stag, he's completely innocent of all of this. All he wants is to go home." Greyson stared at him for a few moments, never once blinking, before sighing heavily and muttering something about "Damn gods always thinking they can get away with anything" before setting him down and allowing him to take the guitar. "You owe me," Greyson told him as he snuck his way back down into the pit. Good timing too, because the Lady was beginning to become frustrated with Fox. Coyote cut the bonds on Skull Kid's wrists and hissed, "Do what you did at the bar and slowly make your way towards the door. As soon as you get there, run." And moved back to his seat in the Court without being noticed. Skull Kid flexed his hand before strumming a few chords on his guitar to gain everyone's attention. Everyone looked surprised, except for Fox and Coyote, and the Lady who looked enraged. She stalked towards him but stopped as soon as he began to play. Then, he did what he did best. He sang.

End of part 6.
As a gentleman, it is my duty to wear top-hats.

Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.

Weevil-Infested Badfun Wrongsex Referee From The 9th Earth
Slick and Deranged Wombat of Manhood Questioning
Hulking Dormouse of Lust and DESPAIRâ„¢
Gatling Geyser of Rainbow AIDS

"The only way we can ever change anything is to look in the mirror and find no enemy." - Akala  'Find No Enemy'.