Doktor Howl's Secret Enemies List, with commentary.

[Doktor Howl]

Shouldn't you add Doktor Howl to this list?

Self loathing is the hallmark of today's disenfranchised youth, it'll make you feel younger and does wonders for the skin.

I don't want to feel younger. I LIKE being curmudgeony.

And I like me.  Probably to unhealthy degrees.

Your shelf life expired last century.

But

I'M

STILL

HERE.

[Don Coyote]

Shouldn't you add Doktor Howl to this list?

Self loathing is the hallmark of today's disenfranchised youth, it'll make you feel younger and does wonders for the skin.

I don't want to feel younger. I LIKE being curmudgeony.

And I like me.  Probably to unhealthy degrees.

Your shelf life expired last century.

But

I'M

STILL

HERE.

DOk Howl, the Hostess Cake of Mad Science.

[Doktor Howl]

Shouldn't you add Doktor Howl to this list?

Self loathing is the hallmark of today's disenfranchised youth, it'll make you feel younger and does wonders for the skin.

I don't want to feel younger. I LIKE being curmudgeony.

And I like me.  Probably to unhealthy degrees.

Your shelf life expired last century.

But

I'M

STILL

HERE.

DOk Howl, the Hostess Cake of Mad Science.

Best if used before Armageddon.

[Cain]

At the moment I only get to torment suburban children, sadly.  And I'm not even allowed to be inventive in that.  Thanks, state school system!  Oh how I long for the days when I could make a child run laps of the pitch "until I'm satisfied you've learn your lesson".  And then leave them to it while I do my shopping.

Apparently, according to documents I was given today and told I must read "I must consider the safety of the children in my care paramount".  So no sending them off to play in traffic when I have a headache, then.

[Adios]

Shouldn't you add Doktor Howl to this list?

Self loathing is the hallmark of today's disenfranchised youth, it'll make you feel younger and does wonders for the skin.

I don't want to feel younger. I LIKE being curmudgeony.

And I like me.  Probably to unhealthy degrees.

Your shelf life expired last century.

But

I'M

STILL

HERE.

Because you too are Immortal. Live with it. 

[BadBeast]

Cainad:  Spells his name wrong just to piss me off.

Dancing Pickle:  Libertarian.

Vexation:  Vexes me, gets pissy at me for being pissy.

Peleus:  Secretly lives in Portland.

Vartox:  Has a better avatar than I do.

Badbeast:  Anarchist.  Also quotes bad music.  Should be exiled to the Isle of Wight.

Thurnez:  IRC junkie, never stops in to say hello.

Risus:  Named himself after a candy bar.

Roaring Biscuit:  Calls soccer "football".

Rumckle:  Came up with a better cabal name than I did.

Bones:  Lives upside down.  Just to show off.

Lysergic:  See Bones.  Fucking kangaroos.

EOT:  Dropped out of character this morning.

Telarus:  Is too fucking nice all the time.

Lord Glittersnatch:  Isn't too fucking nice all the time.

More to follow.

Are you gonna risk having me team up with David Icke? (Also, that's good music, mostly)

[Nast]

I still don't know what you have against me. 

[BadBeast]

Who? Me? Nothing/

[Dysnomia]

Lizzay:  Can't afford to come party with me in Tucson.

fixxord for financial accuracy

[Doktor Howl]

Stella:  Knowingly lives in Texas.

Alty:  Is infected with Palinism.

[Salty]

It's not my fault they're always making with the sexy eyes.

[Doktor Howl]

Telarus:  Pretends he's from Portland, just to look hip.

Epithemius:  Fucks off for years at a time, just to piss me off.

[Don Coyote]

I'm not WELSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Doktor Howl]

I'm not WELSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, I'd expect you to say that.

[Don Coyote]

I'm not WELSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, I'd expect you to say that.

I also got accused of being Scottish at a ren faire this weekend.