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tell me about your sex life

Started by rong, June 21, 2014, 02:52:45 PM

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Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: NoLeDeMiel on June 23, 2014, 03:37:58 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?

She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.

I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.

Yes. Very hard to find kinky people in Portland. For instance, sometimes you have to take such extreme measures as walking down the street or going to the grocery store. At least 1 in every 30 Portlander is straight vanilla. It's like trying to find hay in a haystack...which happens to have a needle somewhere in it.

Seriously. The people I feel sorry for are the ones looking for a non-kinky partner, because those are like fucking unicorns.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


The Good Reverend Roger

I am vanilla as hell.  I just believe in putting my back into it.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Q. G. Pennyworth

Boys are silly and think I can't out-wrestle them. You'd think the tentacles would tip them off.

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 23, 2014, 03:50:45 PM
Boys are silly and think I can't out-wrestle them. You'd think the tentacles would tip them off.

This is because you are tiny.

Tiny tiny tiny.

The Good Reverend Hamish,
Prefers women that can whoop his ass.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 03:49:17 PM
I am vanilla as hell.  I just believe in putting my back into it.

Yeah, I really don't consider myself kinky at all, but it occurs to me that this is possibly for the same reason that Bondage Girl identifies as kinky, which is that I don't get a charge out of the label at all, and she does.

Oh, and in addition I HATE all the lingo that people use around polyamory and kink. It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


The Good Reverend Roger

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Nephew Twiddleton

The word play adds a sort of immature quality to it. It's an odd bit of jargon.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Cain

Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?

She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.

I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.

Jesus, she sounds insufferable.  Like the sexual equivalent of someone who considers themselves a hardcore druggie because they once had a spliff at a party.

Junkenstein

Quote from: Cain on June 23, 2014, 04:41:00 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?

She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.

I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.

Jesus, she sounds insufferable.  Like the sexual equivalent of someone who considers themselves a hardcore druggie because they once had a spliff at a party.

Yep, you're both on the money. It's the taboo aspect that makes certain kinds of people turn into attention whores.

But when you actually run towards these people with the ball gag and crack pipe, well, it's never turned into a fun time.

It may be my approach.
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Q. G. Pennyworth

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 03:54:14 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 23, 2014, 03:50:45 PM
Boys are silly and think I can't out-wrestle them. You'd think the tentacles would tip them off.

This is because you are tiny.

Tiny tiny tiny.

The Good Reverend Hamish,
Prefers women that can whoop his ass.

I only look tiny because half of me is in hammer space.

Raz Tech

Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 04:05:01 PM
It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.

Or watersports, where it's not sports, it's laying in a bathtub wondering just what wrong turn you took in your life to get to the point where JESUS CHRIST HOW MUCH ASPARAGUS CAN YOU EAT IN ONE SITTING.

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 23, 2014, 06:00:26 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on June 23, 2014, 03:54:14 PM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on June 23, 2014, 03:50:45 PM
Boys are silly and think I can't out-wrestle them. You'd think the tentacles would tip them off.

This is because you are tiny.

Tiny tiny tiny.

The Good Reverend Hamish,
Prefers women that can whoop his ass.

I only look tiny because half of me is in hammer space.

Point.  Extra-dimensional Jimmy Walnuts.  The mind gibbers in terror.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Junkenstein

Quote from: Raz Tech on June 23, 2014, 06:25:18 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 04:05:01 PM
It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.

Or watersports, where it's not sports, it's laying in a bathtub wondering just what wrong turn you took in your life to get to the point where JESUS CHRIST HOW MUCH ASPARAGUS CAN YOU EAT IN ONE SITTING.

:lulz:
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

Cainad (dec.)

Quote from: Raz Tech on June 23, 2014, 06:25:18 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 04:05:01 PM
It's not "play", assholes, it's FUCKING.

Or watersports, where it's not sports, it's laying in a bathtub wondering just what wrong turn you took in your life to get to the point where JESUS CHRIST HOW MUCH ASPARAGUS CAN YOU EAT IN ONE SITTING.

wtf :lol:

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Cain on June 23, 2014, 04:41:00 PM
Quote from: The Right Reverend Nigel on June 23, 2014, 12:07:55 AM
I have a young friend who has been all dramatic and moany lately about how hard it is to date when you're kinky, and how will she ever find a kinky boyfriend, blah blah blah. I'm like, how about you start by finding a guy you LIKE?

She discovered bondage six months ago. That's it. Bondage. It's not like she has some weird specialized fetish that's hard to get people to indulge. It's not even anything I think most people other than the most straightlaced would consider kinky, any more than spanking or cross-dressing or threesomes.

I am starting to think that for some people, their kink is thinking of themselves as kinky.

Jesus, she sounds insufferable.  Like the sexual equivalent of someone who considers themselves a hardcore druggie because they once had a spliff at a party.

YES YES THIS

It's the pretentious babblings of a sheltered trust-fund kid who is finally, FINALLY doing something her parents would probably disapprove of.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."