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Shangri-La: The second year

Started by Da6s, September 17, 2011, 07:23:44 AM

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Roly Poly Oly-Garch

Quote from: Da6s on December 31, 2011, 10:47:03 AM
...the Da6s hated Christmas, in fact, the whole tourist season. He needed only look outside to know the exact reason...

I will be getting fucking shwasted in mecca, and paying an insane 50 dollars for a cab ride home, because fuck it.


Mecca?

...Oh and just as a thank you for the posts, you got a beer in FoCo anytime you care to claim it.
Back to the fecal matter in the pool

Da6s

Quote from: NoLeDeMiel on January 01, 2012, 12:01:37 PM
Quote from: Da6s on December 31, 2011, 10:47:03 AM
...the Da6s hated Christmas, in fact, the whole tourist season. He needed only look outside to know the exact reason...

I will be getting fucking shwasted in mecca, and paying an insane 50 dollars for a cab ride home, because fuck it.


Mecca?

...Oh and just as a thank you for the posts, you got a beer in FoCo anytime you care to claim it.

If you head back a few pages in or kill me you'll find Shangri-La: Year One. I discuss the dynamic between it and my now quiet, peaceful shangri.

Also, it rhymes with mecc. And a shit load of crazy people treat it as a religious destination. And it's full bro-brahs.
We appear to be doomed by our DNA to repeat the same destructive behaviors our forebears have repeated for millenia. If anything our problem solving skills have actually diminished with the advent of technology & our ubiquitous modern conveniences. & yet despite our predisposition towards fear-driven hostility; towards what we anachronistically term primitive behavior another instinct is just as firmly encoded in our make-up. We are capable as our ancestors were of incredible breathtaking acts of kindness. Every hour of every day a man risks his life at a moments notice to save another. Forget for a moment the belligerent benevolent billionaires who grant the unfortunate a crumb of costfree cake. I speak of pure acts of selflessness. A Mother who rushes into the street to save a child from a speeding vehicle. A person who runs into a burning building to reach a family trapped on the upper story. Such actions,such moments,such unconscious selfless decisions,define what it is to be human

Da6s

Guest just rolled up into my office. This was the conversation.

Guest (coat, beanie, neckbeard, dealer vibe) - "Hi, I called here earlier about getting back into the room we checked out of. I was told you guys would let me in?"
Me - "Actually the woman you spoke with has been trying to call you back with an update to that. The place you stayed in was on a back to back, and the occupying guest checked in today"
G - "Is there any way you could go over with me, so I can look for it?"
M - "No sir, I'm afraid that won't be possible. However, because this was cleaned for the new arrival today any items that may have been left behind would've been found and taken out of the room by housekeeping. If you'll give me some information I'll have someone from this office call housekeeping tomorrow to see if they've located your missing item."
G - "Um, so there's no way you can get it for me tonight?"
M - *beginning to think this dude is sketchy* "No, that's not an option. I need the last name on your reservation, a phone number we can reach you at, and a description of the item and where it was left"
G - "ok here's my contact info"
M - "I also need a description of the item and the location it was left so they can locate it"
G - "Ok, well, it's a machete, and it was left in its holder in the living room."
M - *blink* "A Machete?"
G - "Yeah, my sister just got back from Honduras, and they're really cheap there, and so it was my christmas present from her."
M - "I see."
G - "Probably wasn't the best item to leave in the room"
M - "I will have someone call you once we contact housekeeping in the morning".


Yeahhhhh.
We appear to be doomed by our DNA to repeat the same destructive behaviors our forebears have repeated for millenia. If anything our problem solving skills have actually diminished with the advent of technology & our ubiquitous modern conveniences. & yet despite our predisposition towards fear-driven hostility; towards what we anachronistically term primitive behavior another instinct is just as firmly encoded in our make-up. We are capable as our ancestors were of incredible breathtaking acts of kindness. Every hour of every day a man risks his life at a moments notice to save another. Forget for a moment the belligerent benevolent billionaires who grant the unfortunate a crumb of costfree cake. I speak of pure acts of selflessness. A Mother who rushes into the street to save a child from a speeding vehicle. A person who runs into a burning building to reach a family trapped on the upper story. Such actions,such moments,such unconscious selfless decisions,define what it is to be human

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Da6s

#19
We finally have snow. 6 inches from yesterday, this morning actually.

I just checked in a guest from my birth state.

A sassy, larger woman with a THICK tenn-uh-cee accent. THICK.

Making pleasant chit chat, telling her about how I like it out here, and then I point out it's a great time to be here, and how pretty it is finally thanks to the snow.

Her response?

"Oh honey, I know, it's a god thing  :) "



I don't even have fucking words.

-Or kill me.


Edit: I now find myself torn. I really want some terrible horrible un-controllable happenstance to plague her, but on the other hand I REALLY don't want to deal with her. Ever.

Maybe her flight out will get delayed/canceled. That'd be cool.
We appear to be doomed by our DNA to repeat the same destructive behaviors our forebears have repeated for millenia. If anything our problem solving skills have actually diminished with the advent of technology & our ubiquitous modern conveniences. & yet despite our predisposition towards fear-driven hostility; towards what we anachronistically term primitive behavior another instinct is just as firmly encoded in our make-up. We are capable as our ancestors were of incredible breathtaking acts of kindness. Every hour of every day a man risks his life at a moments notice to save another. Forget for a moment the belligerent benevolent billionaires who grant the unfortunate a crumb of costfree cake. I speak of pure acts of selflessness. A Mother who rushes into the street to save a child from a speeding vehicle. A person who runs into a burning building to reach a family trapped on the upper story. Such actions,such moments,such unconscious selfless decisions,define what it is to be human

Da6s

ML fucking K. Hell weekend. To say this place is currently a miserable place to be would be an understatement. Usually this place contains serenity. Usually I can sleep like I'm in a coma and wake up feeling perfectly rested. Usually my existence is stress free, and my light hearted this-is-fucked-up-chaotic-funny attitude makes working here feel like the dream job it is.

These good warm fuzzy inducing feelings have vanished. In their place are exhaustion, stress, and growing resentment. These three evils will pass come Tuesday, and shangri will once again be a lovely place to live.

Until then, it's fucking hell.

For some unknown reason EVERY fucking snow sports enthusiast day-tripper in all of existence heads to the mountains for MLK weekend. I've learned this is the case everywhere. They all get in their that "hay! it's a monday and I'm off work today! ski resorts are never crowded on monday! ima go to the mountain! GOOD PLAN!!!" Once, in my youth, I made the mistake of venturing to my former home resort of Sugar Mountain, NC on MLK Monday. I paid southern snow crack prices for a 1 day student lift ticket (70ish, laughable compared to the 104 for a day pass here). I was expecting to have paid a stupid amount for a day of solid riding. It turns out I had paid for 3 eight minute runs from upper flying mile to the base, before standing in line for an hour, then an hour and 45 minutes, then an hour and ten minutes. I drove the hour and 15 minutes to my parents house beyond pissed off that day, swearing to never set foot on a ski resort on mlk ever again. Maybe breaking that pact is why this has been so terrible. 


Rant interrupted. Finish later.
We appear to be doomed by our DNA to repeat the same destructive behaviors our forebears have repeated for millenia. If anything our problem solving skills have actually diminished with the advent of technology & our ubiquitous modern conveniences. & yet despite our predisposition towards fear-driven hostility; towards what we anachronistically term primitive behavior another instinct is just as firmly encoded in our make-up. We are capable as our ancestors were of incredible breathtaking acts of kindness. Every hour of every day a man risks his life at a moments notice to save another. Forget for a moment the belligerent benevolent billionaires who grant the unfortunate a crumb of costfree cake. I speak of pure acts of selflessness. A Mother who rushes into the street to save a child from a speeding vehicle. A person who runs into a burning building to reach a family trapped on the upper story. Such actions,such moments,such unconscious selfless decisions,define what it is to be human

Da6s

#21
Fuck I'm a horrible person.

I was called that as well. I was also referred to as a non-human-being, guilty of being too young to understand, and insensitive.

Here's tonight:

The beasts night security patrol waved me down in a parking lot. He asked if we were responsible for X unit, and that a guest in X unit was arrested. Said guest was combative against the cops, and they had to use a fucking K9 unit to subdue him. Security patrol tells me the cops and him tried to enter the property, but the mother of the family refused. He also tells me it was the arrested guests sister that called the police on his ass.

Christ, I sure hope we don't manage this place!

We fucking do.

I call dispatch, and ask for the deputy to call and give me the full story. Fuzzman calls, and tells me they did arrest said guest, and had to use a dog. The deputy reported that his partner had seen "2 or 3 holes punched in the wall" as well.

Fuck.

That's two strikes.

In our signed in blood binding rental agreement contract  with guests we have an entire section that says "if you commit a strike, we can kick your ass out with no refund." I call my MOD to update them of the shit thats gone down, and wait for the dreaded agreement.

I get the order to evict the guest. I've never evicted anyone before. This'll be interesting.

I call dispatch again, and request the deputy to come and escort me to evict guest based on this broad section of fuck you in our rental agreement. I meet them in building X. They're hesitant to help me, due to their civil clerk telling them they couldn't evict anyone without 72 hour written notice. I asked about evictions from hotel type lodging, and they didn't know. They said they would wait in the hall behind me in case the guest threatened me.  I knocked twice, no answer, and entered screaming.

Two ghastly figures approached me. I turned on the light. It was the mother and father of this family, probably in their 50's. I explain to them that we're evicting them for the violation of the rental agreement, and hand them a copy of it with the section about evictions highlighted.

The guests were distraught, father of the family was angry, referred to me as "insensitive" "too young to understand" "not a human being". Initially I gave them 2 hours (3:30 AM) to get out, they pleaded with me repeatedly that 2 hours wasn't enough time, told them they could have until 4:30 AM.

From here on i'm just going to paste from my report. Running out of time. My writing style takes too damned long for proper ranting. Would explain my unfinished/never posted despite being halfway typed rants.


Sister's husband approached me midway through, mentioned police were in the hallway and he backed away. Guests repeatedly asked me to shut the door and to come inside and see the damage, told them repeatedly no and never closed the door. Deputies were around corner in elevator area, heard the entire conversation. As I was leaving I told the guests again they had to be out at 4:30 AM, killed their lock, explained their keys would no longer work, and left.

It's now 4:07, and I get to walk over there in 23 minutes. I really fucking hope these people complied. I've never had to kick anyone out before. Would be fucking nice if we had a procedure in place for this shit. We do? I wrote what? How the hell did I write the book on this if I've never had this happen?!?!

Oh wait...



tl;dr at least tom brady lost. and I didn't even cover having my chi shattered before my shift even started...


If the guest hasn't left you can kill me. Buying me a drink would be cool too.


Edit: They left. So relieved. Also, fuck yeah 11.5 hour shift!

-Or Kill Me
We appear to be doomed by our DNA to repeat the same destructive behaviors our forebears have repeated for millenia. If anything our problem solving skills have actually diminished with the advent of technology & our ubiquitous modern conveniences. & yet despite our predisposition towards fear-driven hostility; towards what we anachronistically term primitive behavior another instinct is just as firmly encoded in our make-up. We are capable as our ancestors were of incredible breathtaking acts of kindness. Every hour of every day a man risks his life at a moments notice to save another. Forget for a moment the belligerent benevolent billionaires who grant the unfortunate a crumb of costfree cake. I speak of pure acts of selflessness. A Mother who rushes into the street to save a child from a speeding vehicle. A person who runs into a burning building to reach a family trapped on the upper story. Such actions,such moments,such unconscious selfless decisions,define what it is to be human

Da6s

It's president's weekend.


FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!
We appear to be doomed by our DNA to repeat the same destructive behaviors our forebears have repeated for millenia. If anything our problem solving skills have actually diminished with the advent of technology & our ubiquitous modern conveniences. & yet despite our predisposition towards fear-driven hostility; towards what we anachronistically term primitive behavior another instinct is just as firmly encoded in our make-up. We are capable as our ancestors were of incredible breathtaking acts of kindness. Every hour of every day a man risks his life at a moments notice to save another. Forget for a moment the belligerent benevolent billionaires who grant the unfortunate a crumb of costfree cake. I speak of pure acts of selflessness. A Mother who rushes into the street to save a child from a speeding vehicle. A person who runs into a burning building to reach a family trapped on the upper story. Such actions,such moments,such unconscious selfless decisions,define what it is to be human

Da6s

#23
Spring break bingo!








BINGO
See truck with
texas tags and
nuts hanging
off the back
Tourist asks for
directions despite
having no idea
where they are
trying to go
See ambulance
called out
for someone who
couldn't take it
Pedestrian is hit
in crosswalk
(and airlifted out)
Spot skier wearing
jeans and cowboy hat
Get cursed out
by senior citizen
Asked "where is
all the snow"
more than 10
times
Spot tacky Texas
truck with freedom
lovin' decals and
a window mural
Get accosted
by passive aggressive
housekeeping company
management
Hit overtime
on your third
work day
of six
Get chewed out
by guest upset
over inconvenient
overflow parking
Get chewed out
because 4 pm
check in time
NOISE
COMPLAINT
Cause locked out
family to enter
domestic dispute
Secretly fantasize
scarring children for
life after they
rang bell 5 times
Fix a urgent
TV problem by
pressing the
input button
twice
Fix a urgent
DVD player problem
by plugging in
DVD player's
power cord
Purposefully give lost
guest bad directions
because they
called you "kid"
Threaten to call cops
on drunken bros
shouting in the
parking lot
Respond to guest
lock out call
and never
find guests despite
looking for 25 mins
Youth group
witnesses about the
lord to you
and gives you
a pamphlet
Remove puke covered
bed sheets
because little kids
are puke machines
Get called in early
three times
in a row
Tourist in huge
fuck all truck
bitches about gas
prices
Employee tells you
you look like
you're about to
have a heart attack


Fuck i wish i knew how to make borders on tables.

Also, I got a blackout bingo! FUCK YEAH! What do I win? A desire to drink and weep while hugging my knees rocking in the corner?! SOUNDS PERFECT!!!
We appear to be doomed by our DNA to repeat the same destructive behaviors our forebears have repeated for millenia. If anything our problem solving skills have actually diminished with the advent of technology & our ubiquitous modern conveniences. & yet despite our predisposition towards fear-driven hostility; towards what we anachronistically term primitive behavior another instinct is just as firmly encoded in our make-up. We are capable as our ancestors were of incredible breathtaking acts of kindness. Every hour of every day a man risks his life at a moments notice to save another. Forget for a moment the belligerent benevolent billionaires who grant the unfortunate a crumb of costfree cake. I speak of pure acts of selflessness. A Mother who rushes into the street to save a child from a speeding vehicle. A person who runs into a burning building to reach a family trapped on the upper story. Such actions,such moments,such unconscious selfless decisions,define what it is to be human

Da6s

Fucking god damned gypsies. They're the bane of this seasons existence.

First we had the fucks with the K9 arrest mentioned above, but I was able to write that off as florida being partially at fault (sorry floridians but you know it's true)

Then we had tonight. This was even after my fucking bingo board.

Well, for starters the pedestrian hit in crosswalk and air lifted out happened tonight. They likely died. That was over 5 hours ago. The police are still working at the scene and redirecting traffic on a detour.

The detour is through two connecting parking lots and back out onto the highway. Not that it matters, but just for mental mapping.

Anyways.

Get a message about yet another spring break noise complaint at 10 40.

Here's the pidgin conversation between me and phones wench:

(10:46:12 PM) B: yes guy next to og--5 is complaining about noise
(10:46:57 PM) B: can you call these people
(10:47:05 PM) B: tell them to shut up
(10:47:10 PM) Me: he's complaining about our guest?
(10:47:29 PM) B: yes
(10:47:35 PM) Me: lemme print off their rental agreement first :D
(10:47:38 PM) Me: then im heading there
(10:47:46 PM) B: they aren't bad but htey are in violation
(10:48:11 PM) B: *hungarian gypsy name removed*
(10:48:16 PM) Me: oh i know
(10:48:22 PM) Me: but with rental agreement i put the fear in them
(10:48:26 PM) Me: fear is power
(10:48:34 PM) Me: didn't darth vader teach you anything?
(10:48:43 PM) Me: heading there now to open up a can of shut the fuck up :D

I then departed. I go through the police redirect, and get to the og's parking lot. I then realize the key I have to get into the lobby door of OG was fubar'd the last time I tried it three weeks ago. I then decide fuck it, I'll try it anyways. Still fubar'd. I leave, drive back to our office to get a new key, passing through the other side of the police redirect, get said key, drive back through police redirect, and back to parking lot. Success.

I head up, exit elevator on the floor, and instantly hear music and laughter and loud noise. I walk towards the door, and sure enough, OG--5 is the source of the racket.

When I respond to noise complaints I describe myself as polite but firm. I knock side fisted because a knuckle tap on a door isn't loud enough to combat a noise complaint. I lay the smack down with the rules, but in the end my bark is nothing but a mere warning.

Here's the rest of the situation pasted from my evening's report:

Guest turned music off and quieted down when answering door, told them that if I came back a second time we would charge them up to 250 if we received a second complaint, and with a third complaint we may evict them. Guest said they would be quiet and thanked me, then a little yappy purse dog came running out barking at me. Dog ran into hall, guest shooed dog back inside. I told guest "...and a dog too?! Now I have to call my manager" and guest promptly closed the door.

Not only were they having a noise violation they also had a fucking dog in the property. I called my mod, since he likes to charge guests who violate our strict no pets policy, and he hits their credit card for 500. I chuckle and consider the issue resolved.

Three weeks ago we had a guest cause serious damage to a property and we charged them 650. I never found out what the outcome was, so I decided to listen to the call tonight. Said former guest's call with my gm was 22 fucking minutes long. I started listening. This guest was clearly stoned out of his gourd during the entire convo, but hey, I was listening for science. I'm 3 mins into this agony when an angry car pulls right up in front of my office. Two angry men exit the car, and I immediately call out for my graves guy to come up to the desk with me. He comes in at 11, and this went down around 11:30. The angry men turn out to be the drunk noisy hungarian gypsies. One, who is determined to be the owner of the dog, starts chewing me out HARD.

Memorable quotes from this ass chapping include "you knock on doors like AN IDIOT" "I want to speak to the police about your etiquette" "how dare you punch a door so hard it makes a 1 year old cry!" "we asked neighbors and they did not make a noise complaint about us!" "do you have proof we were being loud" "the dog is mine and I am just visiting!" "you can not talk to us like you did!" And several others. I called my mod who's also big big boss and he spoke with the guy who's names on the rez. We'll call him boris. So boris is bitching about me to my boss and calling me an idiot and blasting our company and threatening to never come back to shagri'la ever again, which is fucking fine by me. Their convo trails off and his buddy vladmir confronts me.

The entire time boris is raging over me vladmir is on the right keeps clenching his fists and approaching the front desk. He then leans on the desk, and repositions himself every so often so he's slowly leaning more and more over the desk. I stand with my hands behind my back directly in front of him, with graves guy over my right shoulder. Graves guy is 6' easy, and totally looks like he can scrap. To the right of graves guy is our wine shelf, chock full of 40 bottles of wine ripe for the bludgeoning. I have no fear. In fact, I start cheshire cat smiling out of the hilarity of the situation. This enrages vladmir even more. Finally vladmir crosses the mid point of the desk and I point out that vladmir is on camera and that our conversation is also being recorded. Vladmir instantly backs away, while chiding me and my company because where they're staying doesn't have a phone, and that it wasn't their fault they didn't know what time it was. For some reason raging tourists HATE when you point out their actions are being recorded. You can always tell how flustered they get in their face. It's like all of a sudden they realize they've marched into a battlefield that is not favorable to them at all.

Finally Boris decides he's getting no where with my big big boss and abruptly leaves. Vladmir follows, but not before shooting me one more glare. I smile and give him the nod. He storms out the door. I call my mod back, and my mod informs me he charged them 500 for the noise complaint and the pet violation.

Justice.


-Or kill me
just do it fucking soon, season ends in 3 weeks.
We appear to be doomed by our DNA to repeat the same destructive behaviors our forebears have repeated for millenia. If anything our problem solving skills have actually diminished with the advent of technology & our ubiquitous modern conveniences. & yet despite our predisposition towards fear-driven hostility; towards what we anachronistically term primitive behavior another instinct is just as firmly encoded in our make-up. We are capable as our ancestors were of incredible breathtaking acts of kindness. Every hour of every day a man risks his life at a moments notice to save another. Forget for a moment the belligerent benevolent billionaires who grant the unfortunate a crumb of costfree cake. I speak of pure acts of selflessness. A Mother who rushes into the street to save a child from a speeding vehicle. A person who runs into a burning building to reach a family trapped on the upper story. Such actions,such moments,such unconscious selfless decisions,define what it is to be human

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

 :lulz: I love the part where you point out they're being recorded.

Douches.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Da6s

QuoteWarning: this topic has not been posted in for at least 120 days.
Unless you're sure you want to reply, please consider starting a new topic.

Ouch. To be fair the past 4 months nothing has stood out and if anything I'm more busy. I'm a salaried member of the mgmt. I'm pretty sure it's a plot to keep me in the dark meanwhile acknowledging i've been in the dark for almost 2 years. At least pay is pretty good.

OH!

That's what happened. I'll tell the story as vaguely as I hope could not get me fired. We were threatened against "gossip" on pain of HR harpy, but i don't consider this gossip.


To set the scene, tax returns are fucking AMAZING when you're a full time employee & full time student at 25. I cleared 3 grand back to me. Having been raised in the uncultured buckle of the bible belt with a parent who's terrified of flying over any large body of water I had never been out of the US. Unless you count a half day stint in tijuana, which was an open sewage shithole. On a whim I bought a flight to Rome for 2 weeks. This isn't a post about my trip, but noteworthy mentions are i hit florence which was fucking incredible and then venice which blew my mind & gave me one of the top 5 best nights of my life. Venice was fucking hot though, over 100f daily. I then took a train with broken air conditioning from bologna to shithole naples. I went to naples for the singular purpose of seeing pompeii. I decided 100+ f was TOO FUCKING HOT to walk through ruins all day. Naples was also a shithole and was a waste of 3 days of my trip. Though it did allow me to do laundry. Pizza sucked compared to chicago though. Lies.

So I'm in shithole naples in this cheap, dated hostel with my own room. I connect to wifi and glance at my email. The first thing I see if a message to all employees. Someone in the upper brackets of the organization had been having an inter office relationship with someone at the same tier as me. The upper bracket worker also happened to be this someones direct superior.
So HR lady heads into our office one day and talks to everyone. I luckily miss this interview. It results in a shit show of restructuring that lasted for another 4 weeks including when I came back. I also promptly received said salaried promotion when I returned.

My office has a lot less drama now. I am however busy.


I had this awesome guy on graves last winter. He left the company just over a month ago. Before he left I forced him into a grueling 11 hours straight of inventory. The two of us counted absolutely everything. This is the boring uneventful part of the past 4 months, but it sticks out.

Now on to the guests I actually remember.


We have an awesome maintenance crew. One of them cleaned this grill. A guest checks in. Another guest checks in a week later. A third guest checks in and calls regarding a "grill fire". The entire deck is covered with fire extinguisher gunk. Judging by the burn marks i'm still amazed the propane tank didn't do something terribad. Propane tanks exploding have given me a complex since i saw final destination 2. No clue where my complex about lightbulbs shattering in my hand came from.


I was taking out recycling at 2:15 am. Recycling meaning a shitload of cardboard the office accumulates over time. Luckily we had a very large TV box that I was able to load with said cardboard to drag across the parking lot. I load the TV box up, and commence the dragging. Cardboard recycling bin is at the far end of the parking lot from my office. On this particular night the strip mall type area of shops had no lighting. I'm dragging the box, pass the lobby entrance, and get about fifteen  feet in the dark when i see a brown blur out of hte corner of my left eye standing beneath a parking lot light. I look over and staring me down is a fairly large brown bear maybe 30 feet away. I release the box and back slowly toward the lobby. Brown bear loses interest and scampers to the dumpster and recycling area. I spend the next 20 minutes slowly stalking this dumb ass brown bear from afar. Mr. bear spent way too long trying to open the unlocked dumpster from the wrong side to not be called a dumb ass.

Last night driving home I pull up my hill and in my headlights is a black bear that's easily 300 pounds. He runs up beside my house. I sprint in and tell my landlords who are still awake in the living room. We spend the next 2 minutes looking for a black bear in the darkness until he rips a hummingbird feeder off one of our living room exterior windows and proceeds to gnaw for the juice in our back yard. Apparently bears don't like shitty snowless winters and prowl much closer to the river when they happen.

I haven't been cursed out this summer, though I know it's only a matter of time. I have dealt with some shitty people but it's become the norm and doesn't even phase me now. I've become entirely too good at smiling while being yelled at. No crazy's assaulting me. Hell, even the bar shenanigans from the beer festivals never spilled over to me aside from 2 or 3 noise complaints.

There has been one awful guest that stands out. I don't know what the fuck this bitches deal was, but I think she was a VERY expensive nanny for two little snowflakes. Either that or mommy the trophy wife dearest. This bitch took almost 4 hours to make even remotely happy. All the while she felt the need to inform me of her personal opinions about the world while using "i read fox news a lot" as her credible source for all things. Some very small pollen got in the bug screen in her window and she FREAKED. The result was me personally escorting her to 3 other rooms, letting her survey each, taking her back to one, then having her pick a different one. This was after I'd already been dealing with her for 2 hours. I then had to help her carry her luggage up 3 flights of stairs to appease her in regards to her having to move because of the unacceptable bug screen pollen. I really fucking hate tourists sometime.

Sadly nothing  else worth mentioning stands out from before my trip. Did a pretty fun weekend trip to vail in march. this was just prior to the lame ass attempt at a tourist bingo board that i made. Winter ended on a lackluster note before easter and then I had my first threesome. Then May happened and I spent some time in arches NP & moab, nothing exciting or crazy though bouldering in the arches was pretty cool. Italy was mid june.

I decided on my trip that this will be my last winter on resort. My plan is to move down to boulder and finish out school with a career change as the final goal, all the while maintaining employment with this company working in a sales capacity. I decided during my hour stint in the Botticelli room of the Uffizi that I do not want to be on the front lines of the hospitality industry when I am 35.


The third and final installment of my shangri series will launch in sept. I am going to genuinely attempt to keep a journal this winter. As a result I hope to post a lot more, giving as much insight as possible into what life really is like working on a ski resort. Maybe it'll inspire some miserable kid to move somewhere awesome as an escape. I'd like that.

I'm driving to Vegas on tuesday. Year 2: FIN


-Or Kill Me
We appear to be doomed by our DNA to repeat the same destructive behaviors our forebears have repeated for millenia. If anything our problem solving skills have actually diminished with the advent of technology & our ubiquitous modern conveniences. & yet despite our predisposition towards fear-driven hostility; towards what we anachronistically term primitive behavior another instinct is just as firmly encoded in our make-up. We are capable as our ancestors were of incredible breathtaking acts of kindness. Every hour of every day a man risks his life at a moments notice to save another. Forget for a moment the belligerent benevolent billionaires who grant the unfortunate a crumb of costfree cake. I speak of pure acts of selflessness. A Mother who rushes into the street to save a child from a speeding vehicle. A person who runs into a burning building to reach a family trapped on the upper story. Such actions,such moments,such unconscious selfless decisions,define what it is to be human

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Anna Mae Bollocks

Quote from: Da6s on March 18, 2012, 07:05:46 AM
Fucking god damned gypsies. They're the bane of this seasons existence.

First we had the fucks with the K9 arrest mentioned above, but I was able to write that off as florida being partially at fault (sorry floridians but you know it's true)

Then we had tonight. This was even after my fucking bingo board.

Well, for starters the pedestrian hit in crosswalk and air lifted out happened tonight. They likely died. That was over 5 hours ago. The police are still working at the scene and redirecting traffic on a detour.

The detour is through two connecting parking lots and back out onto the highway. Not that it matters, but just for mental mapping.

Anyways.

Get a message about yet another spring break noise complaint at 10 40.

Here's the pidgin conversation between me and phones wench:

(10:46:12 PM) B: yes guy next to og--5 is complaining about noise
(10:46:57 PM) B: can you call these people
(10:47:05 PM) B: tell them to shut up
(10:47:10 PM) Me: he's complaining about our guest?
(10:47:29 PM) B: yes
(10:47:35 PM) Me: lemme print off their rental agreement first :D
(10:47:38 PM) Me: then im heading there
(10:47:46 PM) B: they aren't bad but htey are in violation
(10:48:11 PM) B: *hungarian gypsy name removed*
(10:48:16 PM) Me: oh i know
(10:48:22 PM) Me: but with rental agreement i put the fear in them
(10:48:26 PM) Me: fear is power
(10:48:34 PM) Me: didn't darth vader teach you anything?
(10:48:43 PM) Me: heading there now to open up a can of shut the fuck up :D

I then departed. I go through the police redirect, and get to the og's parking lot. I then realize the key I have to get into the lobby door of OG was fubar'd the last time I tried it three weeks ago. I then decide fuck it, I'll try it anyways. Still fubar'd. I leave, drive back to our office to get a new key, passing through the other side of the police redirect, get said key, drive back through police redirect, and back to parking lot. Success.

I head up, exit elevator on the floor, and instantly hear music and laughter and loud noise. I walk towards the door, and sure enough, OG--5 is the source of the racket.

When I respond to noise complaints I describe myself as polite but firm. I knock side fisted because a knuckle tap on a door isn't loud enough to combat a noise complaint. I lay the smack down with the rules, but in the end my bark is nothing but a mere warning.

Here's the rest of the situation pasted from my evening's report:

Guest turned music off and quieted down when answering door, told them that if I came back a second time we would charge them up to 250 if we received a second complaint, and with a third complaint we may evict them. Guest said they would be quiet and thanked me, then a little yappy purse dog came running out barking at me. Dog ran into hall, guest shooed dog back inside. I told guest "...and a dog too?! Now I have to call my manager" and guest promptly closed the door.

Not only were they having a noise violation they also had a fucking dog in the property. I called my mod, since he likes to charge guests who violate our strict no pets policy, and he hits their credit card for 500. I chuckle and consider the issue resolved.

Three weeks ago we had a guest cause serious damage to a property and we charged them 650. I never found out what the outcome was, so I decided to listen to the call tonight. Said former guest's call with my gm was 22 fucking minutes long. I started listening. This guest was clearly stoned out of his gourd during the entire convo, but hey, I was listening for science. I'm 3 mins into this agony when an angry car pulls right up in front of my office. Two angry men exit the car, and I immediately call out for my graves guy to come up to the desk with me. He comes in at 11, and this went down around 11:30. The angry men turn out to be the drunk noisy hungarian gypsies. One, who is determined to be the owner of the dog, starts chewing me out HARD.

Memorable quotes from this ass chapping include "you knock on doors like AN IDIOT" "I want to speak to the police about your etiquette" "how dare you punch a door so hard it makes a 1 year old cry!" "we asked neighbors and they did not make a noise complaint about us!" "do you have proof we were being loud" "the dog is mine and I am just visiting!" "you can not talk to us like you did!" And several others. I called my mod who's also big big boss and he spoke with the guy who's names on the rez. We'll call him boris. So boris is bitching about me to my boss and calling me an idiot and blasting our company and threatening to never come back to shagri'la ever again, which is fucking fine by me. Their convo trails off and his buddy vladmir confronts me.

The entire time boris is raging over me vladmir is on the right keeps clenching his fists and approaching the front desk. He then leans on the desk, and repositions himself every so often so he's slowly leaning more and more over the desk. I stand with my hands behind my back directly in front of him, with graves guy over my right shoulder. Graves guy is 6' easy, and totally looks like he can scrap. To the right of graves guy is our wine shelf, chock full of 40 bottles of wine ripe for the bludgeoning. I have no fear. In fact, I start cheshire cat smiling out of the hilarity of the situation. This enrages vladmir even more. Finally vladmir crosses the mid point of the desk and I point out that vladmir is on camera and that our conversation is also being recorded. Vladmir instantly backs away, while chiding me and my company because where they're staying doesn't have a phone, and that it wasn't their fault they didn't know what time it was. For some reason raging tourists HATE when you point out their actions are being recorded. You can always tell how flustered they get in their face. It's like all of a sudden they realize they've marched into a battlefield that is not favorable to them at all.

Finally Boris decides he's getting no where with my big big boss and abruptly leaves. Vladmir follows, but not before shooting me one more glare. I smile and give him the nod. He storms out the door. I call my mod back, and my mod informs me he charged them 500 for the noise complaint and the pet violation.

Justice.


-Or kill me
just do it fucking soon, season ends in 3 weeks.

I've actually seen that one called the "confusion induction", like some kind of hypnosis.  :lol: Bunch of people gang up on you, all talking at once and being irate.

Doesn't work on everybody.  :lulz:
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division