Oh my God... I've never REALLY ranted before. This is liberating.

[POFP]

I don't like being that guy that takes way too fucking long to make replies because of how indecisive he is, and how much he doesn't wanna sound like a complete asshole. I don't like being that verbose guy that no one wants to start a fucking conversation with or gets replies like, "TL;DR." I don't like being that guy that gets avoided for saying the terrible things that everyone needs to hear. I don't like being that guy who has 20 sentences in parentheses in every single one of his posts because he doesn't want to be unclear.

I can't stand that everyone at my school calls me "the genius" because I stay up too late, researching everything from computing, to advanced physics principles I don't even fucking understand, for 1 day a week, and because I use exceptional vocabulary (to them) because I over-think everything I say (I don't even care if that was a run-on sentence. I don't even want to try to break it up right now). YOU ALL GET BETTER GRADES THAN ME, ASSHOLES. QUIT ASSUMING I'M GOING TO GET A SIGNIFICANTLY HIGHER GRADE THAN YOU ON THE TEST THIS AFTERNOON. YOU ALL MAKE ME FEEL LIKE A NARCISSIST.

I hate being told I have the handwriting of Thomas Jefferson (that beautiful cursive), and then being refused a proof-read 20 seconds later because they claim, "I can't read your handwriting." OUR HISTORY TEACHER HAS A CURSIVE COPY OF THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE ON THE WALL. ARE YOU SAYING YOU DIDN'T JUST READ THAT WHILE WE WERE STANDING BY THE DOOR,WAITING FOR THE BELL TO RING?! YOU JUST LOOKED AT IT BECAUSE IT WAS INTERESTING, RIGHT?

My English teacher gave us a lesson on introduction paragraphs. He had a list of "don'ts" in his "General Rules" section of his powerpoint. It basically told us not to use "maybe logic" in our writing. He, then, asked us to write a thesis, an attention grabber, and evidence on whatever we wanted. Out of protest, I wrote that his "general rules" section "was for absolutists and 'squares." I proceeded to fill in the evidence and attention grabber. He only looked at the first sentence before handing it back to me, without a fucking word. I need to work on my entropy skills. THEY ARE SEVERELY LACKING.

I'd rather be deemed, "clinically insane," than a genius. AT LEAST PEOPLE WOULD STOP TAKING ME SO GODDAMN SERIOUSLY!

That's why, of all the people I want to talk to in the world, it's people like you, I want to talk to the most. I spend hours on here sometimes, in awe, reading your ridiculous absurd brilliantly hilarious pissing contests and snappy comebacks, wondering, how in the fuck did I get here? I read a few lines from some RAW book, and suddenly I'm a religious leader that should be treated "right?" What the fuck does that even mean? I feel like a cliche discordian by saying "Do you believe that shit?" You can't even make this shit up...

When I'm on here, I feel like I've been stripped of the limitations resulting from the social constructs I'm surrounded with on a daily basis. I can actually fucking rant about my life's negligible nonsense and (hopefully) not get ignored. You crazy fucks might make a funny remark or say "TL;DR," just to piss me off. And you know what? I'm completely fucking ok with that, because, at least I can be as verbose, terrible, indecisive, and clear as I fucking want.

P.S. I'll get better at this. I'm not a learned ranter (That's a word? "Ranter" is a word? Why does that seem so strange?). I'll try this again next week. Thanks for listening.

I just realized... Why the fuck can't I be "...as verbose, terrible, indecisive, and clear as I fucking want," IRL? Fuck it. I spent too much time typing this up. I'm not deleting this.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Welcome home, POFP.

And KEEP ON RANTING.

That's how most of us got this way. By spewing our guts out over and over and over again and being FUCKING LIBERATED and challenged and sniped at and having to defend ourselves and blow up and cool down and apologize and get back on our soapboxes and RANT.

You are off to a good start.

[POFP]

Welcome home, POFP.

And KEEP ON RANTING.

That's how most of us got this way. By spewing our guts out over and over and over again and being FUCKING LIBERATED and challenged and sniped at and having to defend ourselves and blow up and cool down and apologize and get back on our soapboxes and RANT.

You are off to a good start.

Thanks. That's enough motivation to keep me going. Now I just have to find the time...

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Hello there. I read it. I like it.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

BOO YEAH

As far as what happened, you have made the mistake of running into The Machine™ head on.

You can't win that way.  There are better methods.

[McGrupp]

Nice rant. As someone who just ranted for the first time a little more than a week ago I can tell you that you are not the only one who hesitated a bit before pushing the post button. Everyone in the world is insane in some way shape or form. Making you think you're the only one is society's dirty little trick.

[POFP]

Hello there. I read it. I like it.

Thanks. Much appreciated.

BOO YEAH

As far as what happened, you have made the mistake of running into The Machine™ head on.

You can't win that way.  There are better methods.

You're probably right. I just wanted to cause chaos in a more original way. I want my own style. You see, I have a habit of ripping off other peoples' jokes, ideologies, and methodologies. I think it's because I have a very mutable personality.

Nice rant. As someone who just ranted for the first time a little more than a week ago I can tell you that you are not the only one who hesitated a bit before pushing the post button. Everyone in the world is insane in some way shape or form. Making you think you're the only one is society's dirty little trick.

Thanks. It does seem that the closer I get to some people, the more I realize, they are very similar to me on fundamental levels. And I think my "fanatic individualist" personality traits make me very conflicted when I come to this conclusion.

Oh well. I'm still young. My ideologies change from day to day anyways.

The bad shit floats, I guess. It'll get skimmed out eventually.

[Golden Applesauce]

I don't like being that verbose guy that no one wants to start a fucking conversation with or gets replies like, "TL;DR." I don't like being that guy that gets avoided for saying the terrible things that everyone needs to hear. I don't like being that guy who has 20 sentences in parentheses in every single one of his posts because he doesn't want to be unclear.

Oh my god, you're my alternate universe twin. (Currently teaching myself Japanese, and the idea of communicating in a language in which I'm not proficient enough to nest subordinate clauses arbitrarily deep causes a physical fear response - which is a fair reflection of how hard I find it to translate my thoughts into English. [also: how hard it must be for people to read what I write. It's a bad habit I need to fix.] Periods are for people who don't know enough conjunctions, amirite?

My English teacher gave us a lesson on introduction paragraphs. He had a list of "don'ts" in his "General Rules" section of his powerpoint. It basically told us not to use "maybe logic" in our writing. He, then, asked us to write a thesis, an attention grabber, and evidence on whatever we wanted. Out of protest, I wrote that his "general rules" section "was for absolutists and 'squares." I proceeded to fill in the evidence and attention grabber. He only looked at the first sentence before handing it back to me, without a fucking word. I need to work on my entropy skills. THEY ARE SEVERELY LACKING.

"Attention grabbers" as an fixed element of writing/presentations are horseshit. They produce essays that start with something interesting but at best tangentially related to the body content. It leaves your audience distracted and wondering when you'll stop talking about boring stuff and get back to the cool thing. You want engagement, not attention. (Attention you get with a one-off stunt; engagement you need to build continuously.) Repeatedly saying "fuck" at a professional conference keynote gets attention, but not engagement. (So does indirectly describing your teacher with an old-fashioned derogatory slang term in a school assignment. The trick to good satire/rhetoric is that the reader shouldn't realize you're disagreeing with them until after they've already agreed with you.)

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

It takes practice... doing it wrong is a launchpad for doing it right.

[Bu🤠ns]

OP: This is the kind of raw unbridled material that I've grown to love about this place.  What Nigel said, welcome home!

[POFP]

Oh my god, you're my alternate universe twin. (Currently teaching myself Japanese, and the idea of communicating in a language in which I'm not proficient enough to nest subordinate clauses arbitrarily deep causes a physical fear response - which is a fair reflection of how hard I find it to translate my thoughts into English. [also: how hard it must be for people to read what I write. It's a bad habit I need to fix.] Periods are for people who don't know enough conjunctions, amirite?

Whadyaknow, my friend is also teaching himself Japanese. I feel like I have the same problem with getting my words out. When I get called on, I have to be prepared and have had a chance to think about my response. Otherwise I freeze up or completely butcher it (Comes out as gibberish).  Couldn't have said it better 

"Attention grabbers" as an fixed element of writing/presentations are horseshit. They produce essays that start with something interesting but at best tangentially related to the body content. It leaves your audience distracted and wondering when you'll stop talking about boring stuff and get back to the cool thing. You want engagement, not attention. (Attention you get with a one-off stunt; engagement you need to build continuously.) Repeatedly saying "fuck" at a professional conference keynote gets attention, but not engagement. (So does indirectly describing your teacher with an old-fashioned derogatory slang term in a school assignment. The trick to good satire/rhetoric is that the reader shouldn't realize you're disagreeing with them until after they've already agreed with you.)

That's why, regardless of the grade I will get on a paper (I usually get an A anyways?), I will almost never use any of that extra bullshit. I just go straight to the point. There's no point in "fluffing" an academic paper in High school.

That was what I needed to hear. Thanks for the epiphany moment. I'll work on that for awhile.

OP: This is the kind of raw unbridled material that I've grown to love about this place.  What Nigel said, welcome home!

Thanks. Expect more!