To the undecided voters

[Cainad (dec.)]

This is one of those spaggy rants that's directed at the general Amurrican public, not necessarily Discordians.

Dear Undecided Voter:

Welcome to November 2008. It's been a long eight years, hasn't it? Some people will try to tell you that voting Republican this year is dumb because the disastrous war in Iraq and the current economic mess that Wall Street has made of itself have happened under a Republican administration. Well, I'm not going to tell you that.

Truth is, we're in the mess we're in because all this shit has happened under an Idiot Party administration. These aren't the benign, lovable sort of idiots that George W. Bush pretends to be; these are greedy and self-righteous idiots who are very good at one thing, and that is getting ahold of power so that they can play their idiotic games with a post-9/11 world. Even the Democrats who sat back and let this crap happen because they were afraid of being called names are members of the Idiot Party's agenda. But this is all old news.

People from both sides will screw you over if they get the chance. Republicans and Democrats are all politicians, and all those "third parties" are jokes from a strategic standpoint. You shouldn't vote based merely on political party affiliation, and if you're undecided, then you are either planning to flip a coin or are waiting for something to push you in one direction or the other. How about this:

Obama says that you'll get no new taxes if your family income is less than $250,000 a year. Let me guess, you probably fall into that bracket, don't you? Yeah, you do, and chances are you aren't going to be climbing above that quarter-million mark any time too soon.

The obvious rebuttal to this plan is the accusation that it punishes people for being successful, and it only makes sense that those above-$250,000 a year people are pushing this line of thought. Okay, maybe. In America, we're all supposed to get an equal chance. But for the past eight years, a Republican-dominated government has been giving tax breaks to the rich folks and the corporations, who just happen to be the ones helping to finance their campaigns (those slick ads don't pay for themselves, you know). The wealthy work to influence the political system in their favor. That's how it's always been. It's not a new thing and it's not going to change.

But why should the rich be the only ones pushing the politicians around? You've got a vote too, goddammit. Why are you spewing their propaganda for them? Do you think they're gonna be grateful and give you some of their money if you help elect a president who'll give them more tax breaks? HA HA! Here's an idea: let's pretend that we still live in a representative democracy where people vote for the candidate who best represents their own interests. The wealthy will be voting for their best interests, and you should vote for yours. And if you make less than $250,000 a year, then Obama probably represents you in that regard. If he falls back on his promise then kick him out in 2012.

Or don't. Vote McCain, and watch as the wealthy corporations are given more tax breaks and the executives prepare their multi-million dollar golden parachutes for when the economy collapses again (it happens, folks, all the freaking time), while you live in fear of being laid off and losing your house and the price of food and gas continue to become more pressing so you have to dip into those college savings. BUT AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T VOTE TO MAKE THOSE SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE PAY MORE, RIGHT? THIS IS AMERICA, AFTER ALL!

Oh, and did I mention that if you don't vote, you've got no right to complain if the next president sucks? Yeah. Life's a bitch, ain't it?

[Bruno]

Why not just steal from the rich directly instead of letting the government do it?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Why not just steal from the rich directly instead of letting the government do it?

Because they'll have their security geeks shoot you in the knee and then fuck you in the ass?

[guest7654]

Oh, and did I mention that if you don't vote, you've got no right to complain if the next president sucks?

I disagree.  Bush didn't strip that right away afaik.

If you are still undecided, you might as well do us all a favor and just sit this one out.  Don't listen to him, you can still complain.

Why not just steal from the rich directly instead of letting the government do it?

Steal?  OMFG, if taxes = stealing we should stop all taxes now!!!  You have enlightened me.  I never thought of it that way.  Its like one of the ten commandments and shit!  I can see it now, Vatican: "If you vote for a candidate who supports taxes in any case, you are committing a mortal sin."

Or we could realize that it is not stealing, and keep our military, roads, firemen, EMS, police, and schools, and junk.

[East Coast Hustle]

yeah, if you don't vote you CAN complain...


...you'll just be a screeching idiot that no one should listen to.

[hooplala]

If you're crafty, no one will know if you voted at all.

[Bruno]

Oh, and did I mention that if you don't vote, you've got no right to complain if the next president sucks?

I disagree.  Bush didn't strip that right away afaik.

If you are still undecided, you might as well do us all a favor and just sit this one out.  Don't listen to him, you can still complain.

Why not just steal from the rich directly instead of letting the government do it?

Steal?  OMFG, if taxes = stealing we should stop all taxes now!!!  You have enlightened me.  I never thought of it that way.  Its like one of the ten commandments and shit!  I can see it now, Vatican: "If you vote for a candidate who supports taxes in any case, you are committing a mortal sin."

Or we could realize that it is not stealing, and keep our military, roads, firemen, EMS, police, and schools, and junk.

Hey, I never said I was against stealing.

It's only stealing if the person being taxed is being forced against their will to pay.

[Eater of Clowns]

Oh, and did I mention that if you don't vote, you've got no right to complain if the next president sucks?

I agree.  Everyone legally able to vote should do so.  But should that be for Obama or McCain?  Not if you don't feel it's right.  Go to the polls, vote for whoever the fuck you think is qualified - could be a third party, could be your dad, it doesn't matter.

You'll get arguments until people are blue in the face about how it's throwing your vote away, but at the very least for the next four years you can say "Don't blame me, I voted for myself."

[Jasper]

Anybody who wants to run the country shouldn't be allowed to, and anybody who thinks I should run the country should be excommunicated.  Including myself.

[The Dark Monk]

I voted for L. Ron Hubbard.
And btw, if you want an equal America democrats, TAX RICH PEOPLE AND POOR PEOPLE THE SAME % RATE.
And Republicans, not everyone is a christian. I AM AN IMMORAL ASSHOLE BECAUSE I DONT BELIEVE JESUS IS SPECIAL IN ANY WAY. MILLIONS OF PEOPLE DIED WORSE DEATHS. GET A JOB.

[Pope Lecherous]

I agree.  Everyone legally able to vote should do so.  But should that be for Obama or McCain?  Not if you don't feel it's right.  Go to the polls, vote for whoever the fuck you think is qualified - could be a third party, could be your dad, it doesn't matter.

You'll get arguments until people are blue in the face about how it's throwing your vote away, but at the very least for the next four years you can say "Don't blame me, I voted for myself."

if you dont follow politics or know shit about politics you should NOT vote.

[Eater of Clowns]

The idea is that the process of voting is more important than the vote itself.  It's solace for the disillusioned.

And I'm voting Felix '12 if only because excommunication is too often just a word nowadays.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

if you dont follow politics or know shit about politics you should NOT vote.

If your name is Pope Lecherous, you should eat a dick.

[Pope Lecherous]

If your name is Pope Lecherous, you should eat a dick.

Do you disagree?

[Pope Lecherous]

The idea is that the process of voting is more important than the vote itself.  It's solace for the disillusioned.

And I'm voting Felix '12 if only because excommunication is too often just a word nowadays.

it's kind of sad that's all a vote amounts to.  If that's true.