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Weird people that you've met

Started by Nephew Twiddleton, July 21, 2011, 08:10:55 PM

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Jenne

Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on July 26, 2011, 05:02:20 AM
:lulz:

Dude that's awesome!

AGREED!

I have met some durned weirdos in my day, but the weirdest encounter with them was the drunken bumfight I was party to over two humping dogs in that train station in France (I think the station was Bordeaux) all those years ago. 

My friend and I had pulled an all-nighter in St Tropez and slept on the beach, almost didn't catch our train heading northwest to Madrid.  We got to one of the stops along the way where we switched at the border and it was around 10 pm.  The whole town was shut down, so we got a couple of candy bars from the machine on the platform and just waited it out with some German girls and Italian boys.  Along come two dogs, a girl dog whining with her tail between her legs and a boy dog humping her like mad when he could stop her.  Along comes another male dog and they start snarling over her.  We're shooing the dogs away, here comes a drunken bum to take his female dog, and another drunken bum comes to fight him over her.  We take off running for the train station security, and my friend and I find these fuckers watching soccer and drinking beer in a back office upstairs.  We had yelled to them while they were doing their rounds earlier over the dogs, but they smiled/laughed and kept walking.  Once the fighting broke out, we had to get them down to solve it because it was dog jizz and bum's spilled blood all over our luggage for chrissakes.

They come down, yell at us that they know "how you Ahmaireecanz leev, you are used to ze veeohlawnss, so vut duz eet mattair eef you see a leetle? Zey weel not 'arm you, so let us be, you crazy Ahmaireecanz!"  Eh, we let them go back to their beer and soccer after telling them they were good for nothing assholes.

Meanwhile, the bumfight had broken up, and the one guy with the female in heat kept trying to dry hump my friend.  And then low and behold, two other guys (not bums, but not all that prepossessing, either) walked up with sticks and beat the HELL out of the male dogs, dragging them away.

Once our train came, we found out it was a wagon-lit, and we'd all been sold the wrong ticket (this included the German girls and the Italian boys), as we had couchette tickets.  The next train didn't arrive until around 4 or 5 in the morning.  We slept on mail trucks left on the platform until the mail trains came through to collect them.  :lulz:

THAT was quite a night.

Anna Mae Bollocks

Some of the weirdest people I've run into have been winos. Cheap wine seems to fry people worse than whiskey. One time, there was a wino on a bench at the East India mall in Salem. He had a big crucifix and he was blessing the people walking by. They were horrified.  :lulz:

We had two winos back in my hometown called Doug and Al. One night the cops had to get them off the interstate because they were directing traffic, but I didn't get to see that.  :sad: 

Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division