Where I am

[Doktor Howl]

I was the kid they said would go nowhere.  Would live under a bridge.  My teachers told my parents I was a flake.  I was a small boy until my mid-teens, and I got pounded on.  Later, I went back and did some pounding of my own.  And I'm still here.

I was the original wait-a-minute private, then the nightmare corporal.  I saw horrors underground in Panama, and windrows of dead on the desert sands.  I got some scars.  And I'm still here.

I was the apprentice millwright, the Get-Us-Some-Coffee-And-Then-Clean-Up-Our-Mess pissboy.  Then an aviation mechanic for a dodgy freight carrier.  Then I met a Cheryl, and then she left with my dog.  And I'm still here.

Then I was a mook, and then The Man, and then the corporate whore fix it guy.  Then I joined the Science Gestapo and I fuck the future into existence, yet I still have to deal with petty tyrants and other crazy people.  My head is a mess and I'm firing on 5 cylinders, and reality is something that happens to other people and that's OKAY on account of

I'm.  Still.  Here.

Where the hell are you?

[Reginald Ret]

I have no idea where I am.
I wanted to hide so i dived deep into books, but when you are reading people can still interupt.
So I dived deep into my own head but no matter how deep i went, there I was.
It meant I turned my back to all my demons so they got a backstab multiplier.
It got worse the deeper I got, it burned away my positive self-deceptions and left me only with the negative ones.
It also got smellier, and smellier, and viscuouser, thicker than the dank soup I was struggling through before.
For a while there hope brought a smile to my face, I could finally see a light at the end of this wet and nasty tunnel!
Welp, time to change my underwear again.

[Doktor Howl]

I have no idea where I am.
I wanted to hide so i dived deep into books, but when you are reading people can still interupt.
So I dived deep into my own head but no matter how deep i went, there I was.
It meant I turned my back to all my demons so they got a backstab multiplier.
It got worse the deeper I got, it burned away my positive self-deceptions and left me only with the negative ones.
It also got smellier, and smellier, and viscuouser, thicker than the dank soup I was struggling through before.
For a while there hope brought a smile to my face, I could finally see a light at the end of this wet and nasty tunnel!
Welp, time to change my underwear again.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I don't tell my story often because it sounds made-up, but here I am.
I've been poor and I've been rich and I've been poor again, but either way, here I am.
I could have been a better wife and I could be a better mom, but well, here I am.
I do what I have to do do get by and at the end of the day, here I am.
Ultimately, there isn't much to say about it all, because no matter where I go, here I am.

[Doktor Howl]

and I could be a better mom, but well, here I am.

I've seen your kids.  You do just fine.  And there you are.

[LMNO]

Once, I was young, and full of privilege.
I learned things from books.
I abandoned responsibility.
I was unproductive.
Now, I am older, and full of privilege.
But at least I understand that, now.
I try to learn things from people.
I attempt responsibility.
I strive to produce.

[Doktor Howl]

Once, I was young, and full of privilege.
I learned things from books.
I abandoned responsibility.
I was unproductive.
Now, I am older, and full of privilege.
But at least I understand that, now.
I try to learn things from people.
I attempt responsibility.
I strive to produce.

INACCURATE.

Try again.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

and I could be a better mom, but well, here I am.

I've seen your kids.  You do just fine.  And there you are.

It can't be too bad, because, after all, here we are.

[Doktor Howl]

and I could be a better mom, but well, here I am.

I've seen your kids.  You do just fine.  And there you are.

It can't be too bad, because, after all, here we are.

LO bounced around like she owned the world.  That's a sign of a healthy, happy kid.

Nigel is Supermom, only without the compulsion to shame other parents on FB.   

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

and I could be a better mom, but well, here I am.

I've seen your kids.  You do just fine.  And there you are.

It can't be too bad, because, after all, here we are.

LO bounced around like she owned the world.  That's a sign of a healthy, happy kid.

Nigel is Supermom, only without the compulsion to shame other parents on FB.   

Thank god. If I ever do, send someone to my house to pith me.

[Don Coyote]

Where am I?

WHERE am I?

Where AM YOU!!

It's a little bit past the time of day when they start issuing out new hours, minutes, and seconds.

My silkies are soaked to my ass, and my compass is spinning.

The XO ran off with my last protractor.

I asked for an 8-digit and can't even get which map I am supposed to be on.

I wake up, sweating, dry-mouthed, fixxing to shit myself.

I wish I had those problems, because you can always just start walking.

Always just start yelling. Leastwise you know how to blame.

Oh no, noon, and the bus is early instead of late and now I'm late for for the last day of the last class only I'm out of bond my paper got printed on greasy tacobell wrappers in too many colors since I'm out of black of toner but plenty of the other kind maybe if I run I can catch the bus only I trip, fall, tumble, the snaps that never come because all my joints were prebroken.

And now?

I'm lost.

Where I am there are no maps.

Or rather all the maps I have are 30 years out of date.

[Doktor Howl]

 

[Don Coyote]

I'm feeling sideways.

[Eater of Clowns]

 

[Eater of Clowns]

I was an angry kid and I'm still here an angry adult but the anger is humor now unless it escapes me. I wasn't picked on much but sometimes I was the aggressor and I'm ashamed of it still when I think of it. The thing I always was is weird and I had to try and I still have to try, and I'm still here with all my skills watch me go. They used to tell me I was smart and sometimes they tell me I'm funny and a few times they tell me I can write but I am a dispatcher and I am still here.
I was a sucker for a pretty face or two and I had no substance and I was a poor man for my unhappiness but I am still here. I went away to college and I met there so many people and in seven years since many are gone but I am still here and the ones who are still here are why I am still here.