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What if....?

Started by Payne, November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM

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Payne

If TGRR was a furry, he would be a giraffe and he would braid his ass hair into a tail.

If Kai was a furry, you'd totally get eaten in the yiff pile.

If Twid was a furry, he'd be a leprechaun. A gay leprechaun.

If Hustle was a furry, he'd accidentally the whole atlantic with supra-whale semen.

If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

If Coyote was a furry, he'd call himself Man. He's an enigma like that.

If Charley was a furry, he'd probably be quite good at it.

If Cram was afurry, he'd wear a fake fursuit.

If TTM was a furry, he'd be illegal in all 50 states, not just the lower 48.

if AKK was a furry, he'd be an alley cat and he'd have a record deal by now.

If Aini was a furry she'd be a black swan. No wait, she'd be a cat or neko or whatever the fuck it was.

If Anna Mae Bollocks was a furry, people would begin to wish Dubya was still president.

If BadBeast was a furry, he could stop being the Beast of Bodmin for a while and let someone else have a go.

If Paes was a furry, he would be bred into the natural sheep population of New Zealand to form slightly less boring sheep.

IF BGP WAS A FURRY IT WOULD BE MOST UNHELLO, WEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOO

If Cain was a furry he'd be the horse from Animal Farm.

If Cainad was a furry, he'd be sniffing the glue they made out of Cain.

If cavehamster was a furry, I'd think he was a pretty cool furry. He'd run in wheels and doesn't afraid of anything.

If chef was a furry, he would advise people to bring a baggie for their fangs, and he'd BE the teddy for their ghetto shrine.

if Cuddlefish was a furry, his name would be a verb.

If Da6s was a furry, he would be worshipped in backwater hamlets all through the Pennines.

If Dalek was a furry, the party in his pance would migrate all through his fursuit, and he'd die within seconds.

If Darth Cupcake was a furry, she'd still be gone :cry:

If Demolition_Squid was a furry, everyone else would be forced to go the level beyond furry to ostracise him.

If Disco Pickle was a furry, he'd have to be wolf. No funny reason. He'd just be a wolf. An asshole wolf. Asshole.

If Dok Howl was a furry, he'd immediately construct an upgraded exoskeleton and fuck the biggest thing he could find to death.

If Phox was a furry, she'd have to wear a human face. Being human IS furry to her.

If James Semaj was a furry, he'd be a complete C.Woc

If E.O.T. was a furry, there would be no point to it anymore. The world would automatically suicide via vulcanism.

If EoC was a furry, people would just assume that things had gone very very wrong in the circus as Clown Eating Hate Sex became all the rage.

If Efrim was a furry, he'd still be a bad ass hippy.

If Emo Howard was a furry, he'd be Eeyore.

If Enki was a furry, we'd have to send him back in time to properly inspire The Epic of Gilgamesh

If Enrico was a furry, people would hardly be able to tell the difference.

If Faust was a furry, he'd be a gay leprechaun too. He'd be a top though.

If GIGGLES was a furry, he'd be a swarm of angry hornets flying in phallus formation.

If Hoopla was a furry, no matter what kind, people would mistake him for a Koala.

If Hunter S. Durden was a furry, he'd be a rabid battle llama.

If Iason was a furry, Indiana would commemorate the most exciting thing to happen to their state ever with a public holiday.

If Iptuous was a furry, he'd win best dog in show at crufts for the rest of his unnatural disgusting life.

If Jenne was a furry, all of PD would go to jail for very long time. We wouldn't be able to help ourselves.

If Joh'Nyx was a furry, he'd be a toy poodle.

If Khara was a furry, she'd be composed mostly of alluring, lingerie clad tentacles.

If Leln was a furry, she'd never leave the house again.

If LMNO was a furry, he'd.... Wait? IF?

If Madigan T Nubilous was a furry, he would fap so hard it'd make people think of Noahs Ark, where Noah just fed them Viagra instead of food.

If Nast was a furry, he'd be.... uh.... A MOUSE.

If Navkat was a furry she'd fucking everybody. In a good way though.

If Nigel was a furry, people would call it art and everyone was really a furry would have to go do something else.

If NoLeDeMiel was a furry, it might make people notice him more.

If P3nT was a furry, Falkirk would be declared a disaster area. It is anyway, but it'd be official

If Pixie was a furry, I'd totally be a furry too. I'd probably have no choice at all in the matter mind you.

If Pterodactyl Handler was a furry, he'd be redundant.

If Regret was a furry, he'd only join in to snake yiff piles.

If Remington was a furry, it would cause a brief news sensation in North Korea.

If Richter was a furry, he'd be a rancor.

If RWHN was a furry, people would pet him but he'd never get any.

If Freeky was a furry, people would merely blame Tucson and shake their head. She could get away with murder with that excuse yanno.

If GARBO was a furry, she'd be a furry handcuffs.

If Sepia was a furry, he'd be an infinite number of monkeys with typewriters.

If ShoeEars was a furry, he/she couldn't have asked for better advice than getting Roger to do his/her personals ad.

If Squiddy was a furry, she'd probably get confused for her cat and be driven mad by people saying SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR PENIS

If SisterFracture was a furry, she'd bend yuor space/time. Again.

If Suu was a furry she'd accidentally herself among the mothballs.

If Telarus was a furry, no one would take it seriously.

If That Green Gentleman was a furry, she'd be the Cat with the Hatchet

If The Wisdom Cube was a furry, it's Other Fursuit would be a Porsche.

If Triple Zero was a furry, you'd be choking on tribble cum dribble by lunchtime.

If Fred was a Furry, she'd be released by a madman who would then kill himself and she'd go on a rampage with her exotic friends until taken down by the cops.




The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If TGRR was a furry, he would be a giraffe and he would braid his ass hair into a tail.

I have a couple of problems with this here theory.

1.  Giraffes are mute.  Anyone who's met me knows that I am definitely not mute.

2.  My ass hair could be braided, no question...But that would tie my ass shut, and there's no relief valve.  OSHA and the EPA would never allow it.

Also, if Payne was a furry, he'd be a Scotsman.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Payne

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 16, 2011, 07:13:15 PM
Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If TGRR was a furry, he would be a giraffe and he would braid his ass hair into a tail.

I have a couple of problems with this here theory.

1.  Giraffes are mute.  Anyone who's met me knows that I am definitely not mute.

2.  My ass hair could be braided, no question...But that would tie my ass shut, and there's no relief valve.  OSHA and the EPA would never allow it.

Also, if Payne was a furry, he'd be a Scotsman.

:crankey:

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:16:17 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 16, 2011, 07:13:15 PM
Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If TGRR was a furry, he would be a giraffe and he would braid his ass hair into a tail.

I have a couple of problems with this here theory.

1.  Giraffes are mute.  Anyone who's met me knows that I am definitely not mute.

2.  My ass hair could be braided, no question...But that would tie my ass shut, and there's no relief valve.  OSHA and the EPA would never allow it.

Also, if Payne was a furry, he'd be a Scotsman.

:crankey:

WHY MUST YUO STEP?  THERE'S NOTHING HERE BUT PAIN, PAYNE.

BRING A TEDDY BEAR FOR YOUR GHETTO SHRINE.

:digtbk:

:hammer:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Juana

"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."


Pope Pixie Pickle


The Good Reverend Roger

Sorry.

Payne woke Chef Diesel up.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Payne

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 16, 2011, 07:20:32 PM
Sorry.

Payne woke Chef Diesel up.

I was going to wake The Mgt up, but even I'm not that dumb.

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:23:14 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 16, 2011, 07:20:32 PM
Sorry.

Payne woke Chef Diesel up.

I was going to wake The Mgt up, but even I'm not that dumb.

Don't worry.  I played a Franz Ferdinand song and he went right back to sleep.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Jenne

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If TGRR was a furry, he would be a giraffe and he would braid his ass hair into a tail.

If Kai was a furry, you'd totally get eaten in the yiff pile.

If Twid was a furry, he'd be a leprechaun. A gay leprechaun.

If Hustle was a furry, he'd accidentally the whole atlantic with supra-whale semen.

If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

If Coyote was a furry, he'd call himself Man. He's an enigma like that.

If Charley was a furry, he'd probably be quite good at it.

If Cram was afurry, he'd wear a fake fursuit.

If TTM was a furry, he'd be illegal in all 50 states, not just the lower 48.

if AKK was a furry, he'd be an alley cat and he'd have a record deal by now.

If Aini was a furry she'd be a black swan. No wait, she'd be a cat or neko or whatever the fuck it was.

If Anna Mae Bollocks was a furry, people would begin to wish Dubya was still president.

If BadBeast was a furry, he could stop being the Beast of Bodmin for a while and let someone else have a go.

If Paes was a furry, he would be bred into the natural sheep population of New Zealand to form slightly less boring sheep.

IF BGP WAS A FURRY IT WOULD BE MOST UNHELLO, WEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOO

If Cain was a furry he'd be the horse from Animal Farm.

If Cainad was a furry, he'd be sniffing the glue they made out of Cain.

If cavehamster was a furry, I'd think he was a pretty cool furry. He'd run in wheels and doesn’t afraid of anything.

If chef was a furry, he would advise people to bring a baggie for their fangs, and he'd BE the teddy for their ghetto shrine.

if Cuddlefish was a furry, his name would be a verb.

If Da6s was a furry, he would be worshipped in backwater hamlets all through the Pennines.

If Dalek was a furry, the party in his pance would migrate all through his fursuit, and he'd die within seconds.

If Darth Cupcake was a furry, she'd still be gone :cry:

If Demolition_Squid was a furry, everyone else would be forced to go the level beyond furry to ostracise him.

If Disco Pickle was a furry, he'd have to be wolf. No funny reason. He'd just be a wolf. An asshole wolf. Asshole.

If Dok Howl was a furry, he'd immediately construct an upgraded exoskeleton and fuck the biggest thing he could find to death.

If Phox was a furry, she'd have to wear a human face. Being human IS furry to her.

If James Semaj was a furry, he'd be a complete C.Woc

If E.O.T. was a furry, there would be no point to it anymore. The world would automatically suicide via vulcanism.

If EoC was a furry, people would just assume that things had gone very very wrong in the circus as Clown Eating Hate Sex became all the rage.

If Efrim was a furry, he'd still be a bad ass hippy.

If Emo Howard was a furry, he'd be Eeyore.

If Enki was a furry, we'd have to send him back in time to properly inspire The Epic of Gilgamesh

If Enrico was a furry, people would hardly be able to tell the difference.

If Faust was a furry, he'd be a gay leprechaun too. He'd be a top though.

If GIGGLES was a furry, he'd be a swarm of angry hornets flying in phallus formation.

If Hoopla was a furry, no matter what kind, people would mistake him for a Koala.

If Hunter S. Durden was a furry, he'd be a rabid battle llama.

If Iason was a furry, Indiana would commemorate the most exciting thing to happen to their state ever with a public holiday.

If Iptuous was a furry, he'd win best dog in show at crufts for the rest of his unnatural disgusting life.

If Jenne was a furry, all of PD would go to jail for very long time. We wouldn't be able to help ourselves.

If Joh'Nyx was a furry, he'd be a toy poodle.

If Khara was a furry, she'd be composed mostly of alluring, lingerie clad tentacles.

If Leln was a furry, she'd never leave the house again.

If LMNO was a furry, he'd.... Wait? IF?

If Madigan T Nubilous was a furry, he would fap so hard it'd make people think of Noahs Ark, where Noah just fed them Viagra instead of food.

If Nast was a furry, he'd be.... uh.... A MOUSE.

If Navkat was a furry she'd fucking everybody. In a good way though.

If Nigel was a furry, people would call it art and everyone was really a furry would have to go do something else.

If NoLeDeMiel was a furry, it might make people notice him more.

If P3nT was a furry, Falkirk would be declared a disaster area. It is anyway, but it'd be official

If Pixie was a furry, I'd totally be a furry too. I'd probably have no choice at all in the matter mind you.

If Pterodactyl Handler was a furry, he'd be redundant.

If Regret was a furry, he'd only join in to snake yiff piles.

If Remington was a furry, it would cause a brief news sensation in North Korea.

If Richter was a furry, he'd be a rancor.

If RWHN was a furry, people would pet him but he'd never get any.

If Freeky was a furry, people would merely blame Tucson and shake their head. She could get away with murder with that excuse yanno.

If GARBO was a furry, she'd be a furry handcuffs.

If Sepia was a furry, he'd be an infinite number of monkeys with typewriters.

If ShoeEars was a furry, he/she couldn't have asked for better advice than getting Roger to do his/her personals ad.

If Squiddy was a furry, she'd probably get confused for her cat and be driven mad by people saying SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR PENIS

If SisterFracture was a furry, she'd bend yuor space/time. Again.

If Suu was a furry she'd accidentally herself among the mothballs.

If Telarus was a furry, no one would take it seriously.

If That Green Gentleman was a furry, she'd be the Cat with the Hatchet

If The Wisdom Cube was a furry, it's Other Fursuit would be a Porsche.

If Triple Zero was a furry, you'd be choking on tribble cum dribble by lunchtime.

If Fred was a Furry, she'd be released by a madman who would then kill himself and she'd go on a rampage with her exotic friends until taken down by the cops.





:potd:

Dysfunctional Cunt

:spittake:

I am going to have to look for tentacle lingerie just because!!!

:lulz:

Payne

If Eve was a furry, she'd be a land dolphin. a reeeeeeeealy high one.

Nephew Twiddleton

Ok Payne, but neither of us have to like it.

Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Payne

Quote from: Nph. Twid. on November 16, 2011, 07:47:22 PM
Ok Payne, but neither of us have to like it.



That oddly suits you, sir.

I DEMAND YOU DO A SHOW DRESSED LIKE THAT.