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Books That No One Should Read

Started by A.N. Other, August 27, 2008, 04:38:51 AM

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Manta Obscura

Quote from: Enki-][ on October 28, 2008, 10:27:18 PM

Genesis is interesting if you consider it the output of machine translation (according to historians, Genesis is actually translated into hebrew from caananite, from akkadian, from sumerian, with heavy censoring from the deutronomists in the ugartic stage between caananite and hebrew).

Holy-Moses-Eating-Out-a-Burning-Bush, this post just brought back terrible PTSD memories from my Linguistics units courses. Biblical linguistic history should mold and rot in a sealed filing cabinet in the deepest depths of hell reserved for intellectual travesties.

Quote from: Enki-][ on October 28, 2008, 10:27:18 PM

As for the bits of the bible to read, you forgot the heretical bits.

Nah, I didn't forget. Most of them are just bad, excluding parts of the Gospel of Thomas, which isn't really worth reading as far as entertainment or aesthetic value goes. I went to a Catholic college, and had to read a lot of those excluded books, and it was a really bad time. Also, just a quick note: most of the parts that have been labeled "heretical bits" are not actually considered "heretical." A lot of them were just left out because of historical and circumstantial situations during canonization, and many of the original canonizers thought that the "heretical bits" would be too esoteric or irrelevant to the average reader. Few of the gospels/books/commentaries were actually condemned, except for some of the stuff by the Donatists, Aryans and the works of some later scholars of their ilk.

Quote from: Rabbi LMNO on October 28, 2008, 11:23:14 PM
Dear Enki,

Fuck off.

Love,
LMNO

For some reason, this just made me laugh my ass off. Seriously, I nearly choked on a spoonful of Fruit Loops as I read it. Matter-of-fact statements are kryptonite in the morning, I tells ya.
Everything I wish for myself, I wish for you also.

Shadowdaemon

Quote from: Cain on August 28, 2008, 11:05:57 AM
The Bible sucks hairy goat balls.  Awful writing, boring plot, nothing of interest whatsoever.  "Elia who begat Noah who begat Adam who begat Joesph who begat NO-ONE GIVES A FUCKING SHIT, THATS WHO."

I hope you don't mind that I added this to my sig.
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on May 06, 2008, 11:37:00 PM
Prisons are for those who cannot exist without preying on others.

Murderers, rapists, thieves, and Halliburton execs. 

Potheads?  Meh.  All they do is sit on the couch, eating Cheetohs.

Quote from: Cain on August 28, 2008, 11:05:57 AM
The Bible sucks hairy goat balls.  Awful writing, boring plot, nothing of interest whatsoever.  "Elia who begat Noah who begat Adam who begat Joesph who begat NO-ONE GIVES A FUCKING SHIT, THATS WHO."

Rococo Modem Basilisk

Quote from: Manta Obscura on October 29, 2008, 01:14:14 PM
Quote from: Enki-][ on October 28, 2008, 10:27:18 PM

Genesis is interesting if you consider it the output of machine translation (according to historians, Genesis is actually translated into hebrew from caananite, from akkadian, from sumerian, with heavy censoring from the deutronomists in the ugartic stage between caananite and hebrew).

Holy-Moses-Eating-Out-a-Burning-Bush, this post just brought back terrible PTSD memories from my Linguistics units courses. Biblical linguistic history should mold and rot in a sealed filing cabinet in the deepest depths of hell reserved for intellectual travesties.


I actually like dead languages. Especially ones that have been dead or so long that barely anyone know that they exist. I also use my cursory knowledge of sumerian (which no one can correct me on, because no one else even knows that much) to "prove" that <insert your favourite monotheistic abrahamic religion here> was translated incorrectly in these places, totally fabricated much later here, and still noticably dating from a particular period aside from minor details like how many gods they have and whether or not their penis size is documented.


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Seems like you can kind of tell who is an ex-Christian here.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Manta Obscura

Quote from: Nigel on October 31, 2008, 09:27:19 PM
Seems like you can kind of tell who is an ex-Christian here.

Guilty as charged, Nigel.
Everything I wish for myself, I wish for you also.

Cain


Rococo Modem Basilisk

Meh. Jesus was a pretty cool guy -- became gnostic demiurge and doesn't afraid of crucifiction. Too bad most christians have no idea who he is.


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.

Doktor Loki

Quote from: Triple Zero on August 27, 2008, 11:42:11 AM
Anything by Orson S Card except Ender's Game.


Really?  I liked the whole Ender's Game Series, both arcs.  I've never read any Card outside that series though.
Not a Doctor?  Why, of course I'm a Doctor!  Why else would I have this scalpel?      ~Doctor Mad

"He that hath a beard is more than a youth, and he that hath no beard is less than a man."
- William Shakespeare

"If you hear crazy voices in your head which tell you to do something, even something evil, YOU'D BETTER FUCKING DO IT BECAUSE IT MIGHT BE GOD." - Soren Keirkegaard

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Manta Obscura on November 03, 2008, 01:52:14 PM
Quote from: Nigel on October 31, 2008, 09:27:19 PM
Seems like you can kind of tell who is an ex-Christian here.

Guilty as charged, Nigel.

It is all right. I like you anyway.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Iason Ouabache

Quote from: Doktor Loki on November 05, 2008, 08:49:43 PM
Quote from: Triple Zero on August 27, 2008, 11:42:11 AM
Anything by Orson S Card except Ender's Game.


Really?  I liked the whole Ender's Game Series, both arcs.  I've never read any Card outside that series though.
You should try to read his non-fiction stuff. He does a weekly political column and it is atrocious.  He's a Mormon fundie who loves bitching about gay people.
You cannot fathom the immensity of the fuck i do not give.
    \
┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘

Rumckle

I definitely agree about Mitch Albom, fucking pretentious idiot.

Also may I add Pride and Prejudice, that bored me to death

Honourable mention to Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving, I liked it, but the fact that Owen Meaney spoke in caps-lock shitted me off so much
It's not trolling, it's just satire.

Manta Obscura

Quote from: Nigel on November 06, 2008, 12:16:27 AM
Quote from: Manta Obscura on November 03, 2008, 01:52:14 PM
Quote from: Nigel on October 31, 2008, 09:27:19 PM
Seems like you can kind of tell who is an ex-Christian here.

Guilty as charged, Nigel.

It is all right. I like you anyway.

Aww . . . thanks! I like you, too :)

I'm glad I didn't read this until today. Now I feel all warm and fuzzy, despite the crapulousness of the morning.
Everything I wish for myself, I wish for you also.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Rococo Modem Basilisk

I kind of agree with Cory Doctorow's sentiment that studying a text kills it and cuts it to pieces. That said, what's wrong with killing a text and cutting it to pieces? Isn't that how Burroughs wrote his best stuff? But it means that I consider anything that I've been told to read for school, et cetera, to be totally worthless. Mostly because I was instructed to read it, then instructed to critique it.

On a different note, wierd syncronity alert: I just handed in an assignment and was given a numbered ticket in exchange. I'll bet it will be able to be exchanged for something or other. Robert Anton Wilson, thou art avenged!


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.

shadowfurry23

Quote from: Requiem on August 31, 2008, 07:56:29 AM
I've never regretted reading a book.

I wish I could say that was true, but the first volume of Piers Anthony's "Bio of a Space Tyrant" puts the lie to it.  It was so astoundingly bad that I threw it out rather than have someone else read it.  I enjoyed a lot of Anthony's stuff otherwise though - fun juvenile reading.
This play, however, is an affirmation of lifeā€”not an attempt to bring order out of chaos nor to suggest improvements in creation, but simply a way of waking up to the very life we're living, which is so excellent once one gets one's mind and one's desires out of its way and lets it act of its own accord. - John Cage