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Messages - Reverend Loveshade

#1
GASM Command / Re: Choose Your Own GASM
August 26, 2008, 05:36:53 AM
Quote from: VERB` on August 24, 2008, 11:01:07 AM
Wouldn't starting Book 2 om page 201 make a little more sense?

I would have thought that too, but saw something somewhere about leaving more room for the house that links to all the stories. I guess if the site keeps expanding, 100 pages for the house might not be enough.

But all the pages for Book Two seem to be set for 501 to 599. Keeping the pages for a book together may make no difference to the reader, but I think it will make it much easier for the editors. A total of 32 pages for The Seven Seers of Solomon's Sewer have been written so far.
#2
GASM Command / Re: Choose Your Own GASM
August 24, 2008, 06:48:15 AM
Quote from: Professor Cramulus on August 23, 2008, 03:41:13 PM
Quote from: Reverend Uncle BadTouch on August 23, 2008, 06:00:25 AM
I am very new to Choose Your Own Misadventure (ironically, I saw it advertised on another website).  I love it, but so far have done very little there.  I don't speak from any position of authority whatsoever.  But as far as I can tell, book one, The First Day of Fifth Grade, is finished!  That is, there doesn't appear to be any dead links, and all of the story lines seem to get to some sort of a conclusion.  Obviously, editiing may and probably will continue.

Pope Hilde has suggested a second book, The Seven Seers of Solomon's Sewer, which has gotten cudos from Professor Cramulus and Cainad.  You can see the discussion at http://www.principiadiscordia.com/Adventure/index.php?title=Main_Page.  It will probably begin very soon, maybe today.  You might want to check it out!

I've done a bit of structural tinkering over there. I put together a "metastory" bit, where you're wandering around a house, and that will link to our stories.

check out the Discussion Page on http://www.principiadiscordia.com/Adventure/index.php?title=Page_101 . Wandering around the house is sort of like blundering through a Table of Contents.

So to kick off the Seven Seers of Solomon's Sewer, pick a door, and begin writing from that point.  :mrgreen:



The house is cool.  I think that's a great way to make it easy for people to begin new books.

The Seven Seers of Solomon's Sewer is linked from the house at http://www.principiadiscordia.com/Adventure/index.php?title=Page_123 and begins at http://www.principiadiscordia.com/Adventure/index.php?title=Page_501.
#3
GASM Command / Re: Choose Your Own GASM
August 23, 2008, 06:00:25 AM
I am very new to Choose Your Own Misadventure (ironically, I saw it advertised on another website).  I love it, but so far have done very little there.  I don't speak from any position of authority whatsoever.  But as far as I can tell, book one, The First Day of Fifth Grade, is finished!  That is, there doesn't appear to be any dead links, and all of the story lines seem to get to some sort of a conclusion.  Obviously, editiing may and probably will continue.

Pope Hilde has suggested a second book, The Seven Seers of Solomon's Sewer, which has gotten cudos from Professor Cramulus and Cainad.  You can see the discussion at http://www.principiadiscordia.com/Adventure/index.php?title=Main_Page.  It will probably begin very soon, maybe today.  You might want to check it out!
#4
Or Kill Me / Re: Five Blind Men and an Elephant
August 15, 2008, 01:00:34 AM
Quote from: vexati0n on August 14, 2008, 09:49:54 PM
Also the premise of the OP is completely false: a Discordian would generally not give two shits about charging admission -- we'd leave that to the Subgenii.

Excellente!  I thought of that when I wrote it, but have never seen anyone point it out before.  :D
#5
I didn't clarify in the above that, when I talked about species reproducing, I was referring to sexual reproduction.  I know many species reproduce asexually but, as likely won't be surprising, I find asexual reproduction boring.  It doesn't fit in my reality tunnel, so therefore I pretend it doesn't exist.
#6
The report hints that this new bacteria may actually be a new species, or at least be moving very strongly in that direction.  That seems very significant.

The scientific concept of species has a great deal of grey area.  As I understand it, generally the concept is that members of different but closely related species may be able to produce offspring, but the offspring will be infertile.  Problem is, that doesn't work, even in some "higher" species.  Parrots, for example, freely mate and produce fertile offspring not only outside their own species, but even outside their own genus.

Evolution is fundamental to a number of sciences, certainly including medicine.  I suppose if you don't believe in evolution, you shouldn't take modern-day antibiotics, because those are based on the idea that the old drugs don't work very well because the bacteria have evolved.  I think Gary Trudeau did a Doonesbury strip on that.
#7
Or Kill Me / Re: Five Blind Men and an Elephant
August 14, 2008, 08:20:00 PM
Quote from: East Coast Hustle on August 14, 2008, 07:41:23 PM
oh...so you just happened to write the exact same story as two other people without having read either story?

wow. not only are you pretentious and annoying, you're either really dumb or you think we're really dumb.

go be a namefag somewhere else.

The story is an ancient one, and there are different versions of it all over the world.  It probably began in South Asia, but no one knows for sure.  If you notice in my heading, I say that I ripped it off.  Many people have done their own ripoffs, including Sam Gross, Robert Anton Wilson, John Godfrey Saxe (who wrote the most famous English-language version of the 19th century), and many others.  I figured if the Sufis, Jainists, Buddhists, Hindus, etc. could have their own version, why not write a Discordian version?

A friend of mine even used a version of the story in a Christian adult Sunday school class, of all places, and was asked by the church's pastor to present it to children's church.  It actually fits in well with the New Testament teaching that the eye can't say to the hand that, because you aren't an eye, the body doesn't need you.

I think that teaching applies to Discordians as well.
#8
Or Kill Me / Re: Five Blind Men and an Elephant
August 14, 2008, 08:01:04 PM
Quote from: Golden Applesauce on August 14, 2008, 05:11:12 PM
Quote from: Hoopla on August 14, 2008, 01:11:30 PM
Quote from: Reverend Uncle BadTouch on August 14, 2008, 05:08:58 AM
I really don't like syncretists. (fixed)

Why not?

One of Christianity's big points is that salvation can only come through God, specifically the form of Jesus of Nazareth.  To try to save yourself without God is essentially denying God.  Buddhism explicitly makes the statement that humans can discover the truth and thereby save themselves, without teachers or gods - and goes so far as to say that gods can't really help with enlightenment.  Syncretists would have you believe that both religions are simultaneously correct, describing different perspectives of the same truth as the various blind men are describing the same elephant.  Similarly, Mohammed was the last prophet... there just happen to be many other prophets (J. Smith, Baha'u'llah) of God who came later.  It's okay in that it doesn't say that any religion is wrong, it just recognizes that the people who say that that religion is wrong are also correct.

It's doublethink and compartmentalization of beliefs at a massive level under the banner of tolerance.

Interesting points.

Buddhism is essentially an atheistic religion; at least it's one where believing in gods is not a part of the mainstream belief.

You mention combining Buddhism and Christianity, in spite of their contradictions.  I think of modern Christianity itself as syncretistic.  In the Christian New Testament, it's presented as the fulfillment of Judaism (i.e., the prophets were all right about the Messiah, even if no one understood what they meant, but now we can explain it all to you--they all point to Jesus).  Every miracle attributed to Jesus of Nazareth was done in some form by a Jewish/Old Testament prophet (except, perhaps, for raising himself from the dead).

But look at the story of a man who was the son of god and a human virgin who died and raised from the dead.  That's both Jesus and Dionysus/Bacchus (who came before Jesus).

The modern day Christian version of Hell is largely from Greek mythology and Dante's Inferno, not from the Bible.  The wise men seeing the star and reading it as a sign in the heavens, and the book of Genesis specifically saying that stars are for signs, likely come from the religions of Persia and Babylon, respectively (the Jews generally weren't into astrology/astronomy).

Then the church in the European Middle Ages ironically added the teachings of a pantheistic Aristotle, and fought science because it disagreed with Aristotle (although some of the great works of science were, ironically, done by Christian monks).

But if you really want to find a syncretistic belief system, look at Discordianism.  It borrows from all over the place.  The difference is, Discordianism not only admits the borrowing, but accepts its own internal contradictions, something most religions don't do.

Personally, I think that Discordianism makes the most sense of any religion, because it admits its own nonsense.  At least in some sense.
#9
Or Kill Me / Re: Five Blind Men and an Elephant
August 14, 2008, 07:32:30 PM
Quote from: Nigel on August 13, 2008, 05:16:38 AM
Quote from: Reverend Uncle BadTouch on August 13, 2008, 02:51:07 AM
"This story by Reverend Uncle BadTouch has appeared in the 1995 online Non-Existent Apocrypha Discordia, the 2001 Apocrypha Discordia (which is a distinct work--this is the only story common to both of them), Apocrypha Diskordia (German Version of the 2001 work), Book of Eris, Ek-sen-trik-kuh Discordia: The Tales of Shamlicht, and Principia Harmonia. It is also the subject of a commentary by Al Barger, candidate for the United States Senate.  It has been released into the public domain."

I would like to clarify that this story, which also appears on Baron von Hoopla's site, does not technically appear in ED:TToS as the book is not yet completed, but it is planned for the work.

Nobody fucking cares. Besides, didn't you steal that version of the story from Camden Benares? Fucking lamer.

Did Camden Benares do a version of the elephant story?  Cool.  I just looked for it online, but didn't find it.  Do you know a link?  I'd love to read it.  Robert Anton Wilson did a version of the story too, but I didn't see RAW's until years after I wrote mine.  If I remember correctly, the good DrJon put RAW's in Apocrypha Discordia too.
#10
Or Kill Me / Re: Five Blind Men and an Elephant
August 14, 2008, 07:27:47 PM
Quote from: RWHN - on vacation on August 14, 2008, 01:05:59 PM
It's a cute story.  But seriously, Eristotle?  Couldn't you come up with a better name than that? 

Personally, I really like the name Eristotle, but I can't take credit for it.  This story existed for years without the prophet being named.  But some clever Discordians have created writings and a mythology dealing with Eristotle, so I jumped on the bandwagon, if rather later.  Yep, I ripped off the prophet's name, too.

Reverend "I'm a Rip-Off Artist but at least I admit it" Uncle BadTouch
#11
Or Kill Me / Re: Five Blind Men and an Elephant
August 14, 2008, 05:08:58 AM
Quote from: Golden Applesauce on August 13, 2008, 04:40:43 AM
When I tell the elephant story, one man announces that the elephant consists is a nothing more than a protein sheath around a segment of RNA that causes disease, another that the elephant is about four inches long with pronounced incisors and powerful rear legs for jumping, another that the elephant has a tough fibrous body which converts uses sunlight to convert CO2 into sugars, another that an elephant is a gently pulsing blob of slime, and the last that it is a crystal lattice of sodium and chloride ions.

I really don't like syncretists. (fixed)

Now that's a version of the story not even I've heard.  Cool.
#12
Or Kill Me / Re: Five Blind Men and an Elephant
August 13, 2008, 02:51:07 AM
"This story by Reverend Uncle BadTouch has appeared in the 1995 online Non-Existent Apocrypha Discordia, the 2001 Apocrypha Discordia (which is a distinct work--this is the only story common to both of them), Apocrypha Diskordia (German Version of the 2001 work), Book of Eris, Ek-sen-trik-kuh Discordia: The Tales of Shamlicht, and Principia Harmonia. It is also the subject of a commentary by Al Barger, candidate for the United States Senate.  It has been released into the public domain."

I would like to clarify that this story, which also appears on Baron von Hoopla's site, does not technically appear in ED:TToS as the book is not yet completed, but it is planned for the work.
#13
Or Kill Me / Five Blind Men and an Elephant
August 13, 2008, 02:50:18 AM
BloodStar Presents:

Five Blind Men and an Elephant*

being by
Reverend Uncle BadTouch,

Episkopos of the Discordian Division of the Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild
who ripped it off from the Hindus/Jainists


(We realize that, in the era of the very late 20th century as this is being written, the title and
content of this story are politically incorrect. We apologize for any discomfort, but ask you to
remember that the original story was created long before political correctness, and is not intended
in any way to be offensive to elephants.)


One day five blind men, who knew nothing of elephants, went to examine one to find out what it
was. Reaching out randomly, each touched it in a different spot. One man touched the side, one an
ear, one a leg, one a tusk, and one the trunk.  Each satisfied that he now knew the true nature of
the beast, they all sat down to discuss it.

"We now know that the elephant is like a wall," said the one who touched the side. "The evidence
is conclusive."

"I believe you are mistaken, sir," said the one who touched an ear. "The elephant is more like a large
fan."

"You are both wrong," said the leg man. "The creature is obviously like a tree."

"A tree?" questioned the tusk toucher. "How can you mistake a spear for a tree?"

"What?" said the trunk feeler. "A spear is long and round, but anyone knows it doesn't move.
Couldn't you feel the muscles? It's definitely a type of snake! A blind man could see that!" said the
fifth blind man.

The argument grew more heated, and finally escalated into a battle, for each of the five had
followers. This became known as the Battle of the Five Armies (not to be mistaken for the one
described by that Tolkien fellow).

However, before they could totally destroy themselves, a blind, self-declared Discordian oracle
came along to see what all the fuss was about. While they were beating the crap out of each other,
she examined the elephant. But instead of stopping after one feel, Eristotle touched the whole thing,
including the tail, which felt like a rope.  "It's just a big animal with big sides, ears, feet, tusk teeth,
nose and a skinny tail," she thought. "What a bunch of fools these guys are."

Then Eristotle said, "Stop! I have discovered the truth. I know who is right."

She being an oracle and all, they stopped and listened and said, "tell us!"

"I have examined the elephant with mine own two hands," she said, "and I find that you are all
right."

"How can this be?" they asked. "Can an elephant be a wall and a fan and a tree and a spear and a
snake?" And they were sorely confused.

Eristotle explained "the elephant is a great Tree, and on this tree grow leaves like great Fans to give
most wondrous shade and fan the breeze. And the branches of this tree are like Spears to protect it.
For this is the Tree of Creation and of Eternal Life, and the Great Serpent hangs still upon it.

"Unfortunately, it is hidden behind a great Wall, which is why it was not discovered until this very
day. It cannot be reached by normal means.

"However I, in my wisdom, have discovered a Most Holy Rope, by which the wall may be climbed.
And if one touches the tree in the proper manner which I alone know, you will gain Eternal Life."

They all became highly interested in this, of course.

Eristotle then named an extremely high price for her services (Eternal Life doesn't come cheap),
and made quite a bundle.



Moral: Anyone can lead blind men to an elephant, but a Discordian can charge admission.
#14
Or Kill Me / Re: She apparently likes me.
August 11, 2008, 11:58:28 PM
Calendula! I enjoyed your post.  It merely got me going on how some Christians (not all--there's some I love and some who are quite intelligent) will twist things in two completely different directions and think it all makes sense.

As for me malfunctioning?  Impossible.

Reverend "I cannot possibly go worng" Uncle BadTouch
#15
Bring and Brag / Re: fractals
August 07, 2008, 06:49:47 AM
Quote from: triple zero on August 06, 2008, 04:56:08 PM
sweet! i used to code stuff like this years ago, played with Fractint and such.

but um, it's not a triangle but a tree? were you confused with the sierpinksy gasket?

It looks either like a tree or a kidney on a stick.  Nice work, though!  I look forward to seeing more.