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Messages - Precious Moments Zalgo

#766
Literate Chaotic / Re: Books That No One Should Read
February 10, 2009, 03:34:50 AM
Quote from: Requiem on February 09, 2009, 10:38:17 PMGood job, now go read the entire TFYS,S archive,
There's 9 pages of threads in there.  I think I'll just take a look at the 17 page noobie thread and then see what else looks compelling.

Quote from: Requiemas well as at least one thread involving Wade, Daruko, or AKK, and you should be caught up.
I did find this thread about Wade, but I couldn't find him in the members list, so I didn't read anything he wrote. 

I did find Daruko, AKK and IANAR.  People who self-diagnose with Asperger's (not the people who really have it, but the people who read the list of symptoms and think, "I don't give a shit about other people -- I must have Asperger's!") are always fun to have around.
#767
Literate Chaotic / Re: Books That No One Should Read
February 09, 2009, 07:24:42 PM
Quote from: Requiem on February 09, 2009, 04:51:09 AM
Whats with all the lurkers/newbies in this thread?
Dunno, just felt like I had something interesting to say on the subject.  I haven't been lurking all this time (that would be creepy) -- I just logged back on after being away for about a year or so.

Quote from: RequiemNot that I mind, since you seem to be non lame.
I read the "Attention, N00bs" thread before I posted anything.
#768
Literate Chaotic / Re: Books That No One Should Read
February 09, 2009, 01:37:10 AM
Quote from: Lilith Complex on February 08, 2009, 08:15:37 PM
Well, if we're talking about parts of the Bible someone SHOULD read, I always liked the Book of Ruth. I mean, c'mon, that was one lesbian couple if I ever saw one. It was quite moving, actually.
Another fun thing about Ruth is that we learn that David is an octaroon, so according to the anti-miscegenation laws in force at the time, he shouldn't have even been allowed to attend church, much less have been allowed to be king.  I guess people have always picked and chosen which the parts of the Bible to follow and which parts to ignore.

Quote from: Lilith ComplexOh, and hi.
Howdy.  :wave:
#769
Discordian Recipes / Re: ITT, Squiddy reviews beer.
February 07, 2009, 07:04:24 PM
Quote from: Dirtytime on December 01, 2008, 03:12:49 PM
Dogfish Head is, IMO, the best brewery in America.
I like Dogfish head, but my favorite American brewery would be either Ommegang or Founders.  I would also have to give lots of gold stars to Deschutes, Fort Collins, Duck Rabbit, Brooklyn, and Lost Coast.  I also like the beer that comes out of the brewery in my garage, but that opinion is a bit biased.

Quote from: DirtytimeThat's not as strong a statement as it sounds like because the fact is that 99.9% of American beer sucsk rancid goat balls, even the stuff that's supposed to be good.
There's a lot of crappy imports too.  Now that In-Bev has bought AB, I'm sure we'll be seeing more of them.
#770
Literate Chaotic / Re: Books That No One Should Read
February 07, 2009, 03:27:31 AM
Quote from: Manta Obscura on October 28, 2008, 08:59:53 PMI concur with everyone who said not to read the Bible, excepting a few parts:
1) The Song of Solomon.
2) Some of the Psalms.
3) Some of the stuff Jesus said.
4) The Book of Job.
I don't know.  Job drags on and on there in the middle.  Maybe it's an interesting read if you just read the first couple of chapters and then skip to the part near the end where Elihu says "and Heeeeeeeeeeeeere's God!"

I think the Psalms all suck.  David just whines and moans about how everyone is out to get him.  Dear God, you are so great, my enemies do evil yet they prosper, I am awesome yet I suffer, please smite all my enemies, you are so great, don't forget me and how great I am, amen.  There, you just read every psalm.  :D

Granted, Nehemiah was much worse than David about the whole "Hey God!  Pay attention to me and see how great I am!", but at least his book was short.  And he kicked peoples asses and held them in a headlock while he plucked out their hair instead of just whining and playing a harp.

Even better (or at least funnier) than Song of Solomon, is John Wesley's commentary on Song of Solomon, where he strains the metaphorical capability of the English language past its limits in his futile attempt to make SoS into something other than a poetic Penthouse letter.

I think that verse-for-verse, Numbers, Joshua, and Judges are the most action-packed books in the Bible.  I'd like to see those made into a trilogy by the same folks that did 300.

For philosophy and wisdom, I think Ecclesiastes is the best book.

There's good advice in Proverbs, but there's even more bad advice.  I haven't actually counted, but it's probably close to 40% good to 60% bad.  If you're smart enough to figure out which is which, then you don't need the book, so Proverbs is worthless.  That also goes for moral advice in the whole Bible, but THAT ratio is probably more like 25:75 good to bad, and if you're capable of discerning which is which, then you don't need a book to teach you right from wrong.

Oh yeah, I also enjoyed the book of Esther.  I thought the whole Mordecai / Haman subplot was hilarious.

The rest of the Bible is crap. 

Unless, of course, you're looking for a good way to make money off of suckers.  But that's been done.
#771
Or Kill Me / Re: READ THIS SIGN
December 01, 2007, 01:46:24 AM
Quote from: Professor Cramulus on November 25, 2007, 06:18:24 PMthe average human has less than three original thoughts per week
Hi Professor,

Where did you get that statistic?  I wouldn't have imagined that the number was anywhere near that high. 

I would have guessed that the average human has about three original thoughts per lifetime.

Pastor Mullah Zappathruster