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Started by The Good Reverend Roger, September 26, 2012, 03:20:32 AM

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The Good Reverend Roger

Listen up, you bastards, because I'm only gonna spew this once!  You fuckers have been getting up my ass with your Goddamn secular humanist Keep "Bob" Out of the Classroom shit, and your incessant monkey breeding and your piss-poor driving.

Deny it all you like, but it was YOU that cut me off in the fast lane, and then drove a mere 65MPH.  THE SPEED LIMIT IS FOR THE RIGHT TWO LANES.  And it's YOU strolling around in the mall, groaning like zombies and clogging the fucking place up.  I'm just here for the fucking bookstore, and you need to GET OUT OF MY FUCKING WAY.

I can't get away from you fucks, no matter how fast you get yourselves killed in stupid ways.  It's shoulder to fucking shoulder, primates wall to wall, and there needs to be about 5 billion less of you, at the least.  WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM, ALL OF YOU.  24 hours a day.  It's the only way to be safe. 

Oh, I think you know who I'm talking about, Mister "I was doing this before it was cool" SIR!  Ms "We need to censor Youtube for the children", MA'AM!  Mister "Sorry for reporting you to the HOA, but there was A weed in your front yard", SIR!  Goddammit, I hate you all.  I've had it with your shit...and I'm going to kill you all, one fine day.  Soon.

It's not that I WANT to...I mean, that's a lot of work.  I would have to kill 200 people a minute, just to break even.  But it's not like you've given me much choice, is it?  No, you insist on spousal battery, letting your brats run loose, and Taylor fucking Swift.  If it were up to me, it would be legal to kick unattended children into traffic, and Taylor Swift would be fed into a laundry-folding machine, feet first.

I hate your music, I hate your awful TV programming, I hate you talking about your TV programming, I hate your fucking Earth Day, your Quiverful bastards that insist on pumping out 18 fucking children, I hate your inability to do YOUR job, and stop worrying about MINE.  I most especially hate your STINKING FACES, mister fucking subhuman slack-jawed, no-chin, "White supremacy" inbred little fuckwads.  The fact that God didn't reach down and tear your mother's uterus out is just more proof that he's not really all that benevolent, isn't it?

So stop coming up to me, whimpering about "persecution", before you I bludgeon you.  Nobody in America is being persecuted right now, by any previous standards of persecution.  Not the Muslims, not the Gays, NOBODY.  Sure, you're being shat on, everyone can see that, but that's not "persecution".  Ask the Polish Jews in 1939 what "persecution" is...And besides, who's putting up with the little rabbit pellets of poop dropping on your head?  Oh, yeah, YOU.  If you want sympathy, look in the dictionary between "shit" and "syphilis"...When you start kicking peoples' teeth in for messing with you, THEN you'll have my sympathy.

And it's not just America.  England, you better get your shit straight.  Why are you putting up with CCTV everywhere you fucking go?  Why are you putting up with laws that throw you in the fucking can for speaking your mind anywhere near the parliament building?   Why are you putting up with Belgians running around loose just a stone's throw away?  What the hell is WRONG with you?  Last time I checked, the English chopped off peoples' heads for that sort of shit.  Remember King Charles?  Remember when you'd make a fucker's eyes bleed, just for leaning on you?

And those backscatter devices.  Oh, yeah.  That's America, leaking all over your Europe, and there you are with your thumb up your arse, putting up with it.  It's bad enough that you accepted McDonalds and WalMart and Microsoft, but now you have to walk through the pervert machine just to get on a plane.  It will be trains and busses, too, you just watch.

What the fucking hell is wrong with you?  All of you!  America, England, Europe, EVERYONE!  Get off your fucking asses and stop whining about "persecution", and DO something about it.  You'll never see a Yeti whining about persecution, because a Yeti will put a Phelpstien choke-hold on anyone who fucking thinks about putting the arm on us.

WHY DO YOU PUT UP WITH THIS SHIT?

Why do you put up with what passes for "politics", these days?  Why do you put up with your governments TORTURING people for "your safety"?  If they do it for a GOOD reason, then one day they'll do it for a BAD reason, and when they're pulling your son's fingernails off to get him to give up the guy that sold him a joint, don't come crying to me.  Why do you put up with THEIR religion creeping into YOUR government?  Hell, "creeping" isn't the word, is it?  No, it's more like "stomping around your government like a rabid buffalo", right?  And there you sit, with your face buried in a pail of junk food, watching that Goddamn Here Comes Honey Boo Boo and pretending that you're not JUST AS FUCKED UP AS THAT FAMILY.

I fucking hate you.  I hate you all.  Oh, Goddammit.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Internet Jesus

At least you left the Furries out of it.
HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS!

Prince Glittersnatch III

Quote from: Internet Jesus on September 26, 2012, 04:10:20 AM
At least you left the Furries out of it.

Furries have been pretty low key lately, but don't mistake that for them no longer being a threat. They've infiltrated our Schools, our Churches and even politics.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?=743264506 <---worst human being to ever live.

http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/False%20Religions/Other%20Pagan%20Mumbo-Jumbo/discordianism.htm <----Learn the truth behind Discordianism

Quote from: Aleister Growly on September 04, 2010, 04:08:37 AM
Glittersnatch would be a rather unfortunate condition, if a halfway decent troll name.

Quote from: GIGGLES on June 16, 2011, 10:24:05 PM
AORTAL SEX MADES MY DICK HARD AS FUCK!

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Now THAT is more like it!
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Anna Mae Bollocks

That was fucking SUBLIME. The man was in fine fettle today.

Honey Boo Boo, Taylor Swift...I WANT TO GO OUT AND FUCK SOME SHIT UP.

Inspiring.
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

Anna Mae Bollocks

Quote from: Prince Glittersnatch III on September 26, 2012, 04:18:39 AM
Quote from: Internet Jesus on September 26, 2012, 04:10:20 AM
At least you left the Furries out of it.

Furries have been pretty low key lately, but don't mistake that for them no longer being a threat. They've infiltrated our Schools, our Churches and even politics.

"Scritching"?  :horrormirth: :horrormirth: :horrormirth:
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

EK WAFFLR

Now that's some HOLY™ right there.
"At first I lifted weights.  But then I asked myself, 'why not people?'  Now everyone runs for the fjord when they see me."


Horribly Oscillating Assbasket of Deliciousness
[/b]

Pope Pixie Pickle

Quote from: Prince Glittersnatch III on September 26, 2012, 04:18:39 AM
Quote from: Internet Jesus on September 26, 2012, 04:10:20 AM
At least you left the Furries out of it.

Furries have been pretty low key lately, but don't mistake that for them no longer being a threat. They've infiltrated our Schools, our Churches and even politics.

Oddly, the furries seem to have the best anti sexual harassment policies of ALL CONVENTION ATTENDING GEEKERY!

Apparently the furverts have been doing SOMETHING right. The rest of geekdom, for shame, for shame.

Prince Glittersnatch III

Quote from: Pixie on September 26, 2012, 12:52:59 PM
Quote from: Prince Glittersnatch III on September 26, 2012, 04:18:39 AM
Quote from: Internet Jesus on September 26, 2012, 04:10:20 AM
At least you left the Furries out of it.

Furries have been pretty low key lately, but don't mistake that for them no longer being a threat. They've infiltrated our Schools, our Churches and even politics.

Oddly, the furries seem to have the best anti sexual harassment policies of ALL CONVENTION ATTENDING GEEKERY!

Apparently the furverts have been doing SOMETHING right. The rest of geekdom, for shame, for shame.

Consider that this might not be because they are inherently more progressive than the rest of Geekdom, but because they need those anti-harassment rules.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?=743264506 <---worst human being to ever live.

http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/False%20Religions/Other%20Pagan%20Mumbo-Jumbo/discordianism.htm <----Learn the truth behind Discordianism

Quote from: Aleister Growly on September 04, 2010, 04:08:37 AM
Glittersnatch would be a rather unfortunate condition, if a halfway decent troll name.

Quote from: GIGGLES on June 16, 2011, 10:24:05 PM
AORTAL SEX MADES MY DICK HARD AS FUCK!

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Pixie on September 26, 2012, 12:52:59 PM
Quote from: Prince Glittersnatch III on September 26, 2012, 04:18:39 AM
Quote from: Internet Jesus on September 26, 2012, 04:10:20 AM
At least you left the Furries out of it.

Furries have been pretty low key lately, but don't mistake that for them no longer being a threat. They've infiltrated our Schools, our Churches and even politics.

Oddly, the furries seem to have the best anti sexual harassment policies of ALL CONVENTION ATTENDING GEEKERY!

Apparently the furverts have been doing SOMETHING right. The rest of geekdom, for shame, for shame.

They're still furries.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Prince Glittersnatch III on September 26, 2012, 04:18:39 AM
Quote from: Internet Jesus on September 26, 2012, 04:10:20 AM
At least you left the Furries out of it.

Furries have been pretty low key lately, but don't mistake that for them no longer being a threat. They've infiltrated our Schools, our Churches and even politics.

The best thing about that clip was the closed-captioning subtitles! Seriously, they were hilarious, I want a transcript.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."