Word Salad

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

I have a book that I acquired for free at some ridiculous new age conference thing (me and a bunch of friends went to laugh at dumb people) that I'm planning on turning into word salad. It's full of delicious words like "Zoroastrianism" and biblical references, should be entertaining.

Has anyone done one of these before, and if so, any tips?

[AFK]

paper shredder

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

paper shredder

Don't have one. Do have two enthusiastic grade-schoolers. We're considering the merits of cutting out all the content with an exacto and turning the husk into a hidden compartment book project, too.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Things I have learned so far:
Cutting the guts out of a book is harder than it looks
The author of this book is dumber than I thought (and I thought it was dumb enough to destroy already)
Shredders are much more efficient than grade-schoolers.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

Box cutter? Carpet knife?

[navkat]

Fire.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Box cutter? Carpet knife?

I've got an exacto, that's gonna have to do for now.

[navkat]

Re-write the book's jacket-summary to better reflect its former contents.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

"Forgiveness then is an illusion... a kind of happy fiction, sheaths of the 'self', the outcome of Nothing and is nothing."

[LMNO]

Cut each page into six parts.  Rearrange.  Transcribe, adding just enough syntax and grammar for faux coherence.  Marvel at the wonderful poetry you created.

[Mangrove]

1) Remove a page. Fold it in half length wise.
2) Remove another page & do the same.
3) Take folded pages 1 & 2 and find interesting ways to line up the text.
4) Copy the most interesting word combos and sentences.

(W S Burroughs' "fold in" method)



PS What is the book and who wrote it? (Morbid curiosity).

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

A lot of the pages are already shredded in a paper bag, but I have some more full pages cut out today so we can try some of the other methods. Thanks a bunch!

[Mangrove]

For added crazy, try a spot of bibliomancy.

Think of a question, flip through the pages of text without looking. Stop suddenly. Open pages and then stick your finger on a page. Read the text where your finger lands. This is most definitely the voice of God giving the correct answer to your question. 

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

I don't know if this would have been a great book for that. It's one of those "I studied all the religions and Christianity is right and I'm gonna prove it to you!" piles of crap.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

For added crazy, try a spot of bibliomancy.

Think of a question, flip through the pages of text without looking. Stop suddenly. Open pages and then stick your finger on a page. Read the text where your finger lands. This is most definitely the voice of God giving the correct answer to your question. 

No, no no, you have to use a GOOD book for that.
I suggest Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas.