The Hare and the Pineapple
by Daniel Pinkwater
In olden times, the animals of the forest could speak English just like you and me. One day, a pineapple challenged a hare to a race.
(I forgot to mention, fruits and vegetables were able to speak too.)
A hare is like a rabbit, only skinnier and faster. This particular hare was known to be the fastest animal in the forest.
“You, a pineapple have the nerve to challenge me, a hare, to a race,” the hare asked the pineapple. “This must be some sort of joke.”
“No,” said the pineapple. “I want to race you. Twenty-six miles, and may the best animal win."
"You aren't even an animal!" the hare said. “You're a tropical fruit!"
“Well, you know what I mean,” the pineapple said.
The animals of the forest thought it was very strange that tropical fruit should want to race a very fast animal.
"The pineapple has some trick up its sleeve," a moose said.
Pineapples don't have sleeves, an owl said
"Well, you know what I mean,” the moose said. "If a pineapple challenges a hare to a race, it must be that the pineapple knows some secret trick that will allow it to win.”
“The pineapple probably expects us to root for the hare and then look like fools when it loses,” said a crow. “Then the pineapple will win the race because the hare is overconfident and takes a nap, or gets lost, or something.”
The animals agreed that this made sense. There was no reason a pineapple should challenge a hare unless it had a clever plan of some sort. So the animals, wanting to back a winner, all cheered for the pineapple.
When the race began, the hare sprinted forward and was out of sight in less than a minute. The pineapple just sat there, never moving an inch.
The animals crowded around watching to see how the pineapple was going to cleverly beat the hare. Two hours later when the hare cross the finish line, the pineapple was still sitting still and hadn't moved an inch.
The animals ate the pineapple.
MORAL: Pineapples don't have sleeves
The questions followed by my response:
Beginning with paragraph 4, in what order are the events in the story told?
A switching back and forth between places
B In the order in which the events happen
C Switching back and forth between the past and the present
D In the order in which the hare tells the events to another animal
The animals ate the pineapple most likely because they were
A. Because eating sentient beings for exciting/annoying/amusing you is frowned upon in highschool specifically and society at large.
I'm pretty sure this question is in as a sociopath detector
Which animal spoke the wisest words?
A The hare
B The moose
C The crow
D The owl
Tricky, the Moose is paranoid so the desired answer should not be him (but we know better muhaha!)
The Owl is being a pedant and that is at most faux-wisdom
The Hare spent too much time being surprised and not enough time being either paranoid or betting on himself. Such a thoughtless attitude in the face of two diametrically opposed possible scenarios is not wisdom.
The Crow took the Moose's paranoia and fleshed it out a bit to create a more interesting situation, possibly leading to everyone hating the pineapple so he could eat it without being hated. This is the wisest of them all.
Before the race, how did the animals feel toward the pineapple?
Is this before the race and before the challenge or between the challenge and the race? I'm just going with Hungry even if it isn't one of the options.
What would have happened if the animals had decided to cheer for the hare?
A The pineapple would have won the race.
B They would have been mad at the hare for winning.
C The hare would have just sat there and not moved.
D They would have been happy to have cheered for a winner.
It depends a bit on the personality of the Hare but assuming he's anywhere near normal i'll have to go with D.
When the moose said that the pineapple has some trick up its sleeve, he means that the pineapple
A is wearing a disguise
B wants to show the animals a trick
C has a plan to fool the animals
D is going to put something out of its sleeve
What is the sleeved something refered to in D and why would the pineapple put it out of it's sleeve? these are important questions that demand an answer!
Hmmz, i don't feel stumped at all. Slightly annoyed at some of the more boring questions but that's all. I wish all education was like this.