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Topics - The Fixer

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Think for Yourself, Schmuck! / 'Thank the goddess I'm not a father' day
« on: August 10, 2015, 06:14:21 am »
Note: I don't know if this is the correct board, though, I don't really, but if the mods care, they can move to the right place, if this please them.

Hi, my dear discordians friends from all around the globe. I'm Anderson Victorious Molotov Dias, the lunatic. But you can call me Dias (pronounced as Di-ass). I'm a delegate from Brazilian Illuminati Cabal S.H.I.M.O. (Sociedade Hermética Iniciática da Mão Onanástica).
I'm a writer and also the guy of the calender, I mean, not the guy who poses for the calendar (It would be funny, though), but the guy who translate the Whollydays from english to portuguese. My name is Dias, if I didn't took care of the calendar, what would I be? - Dias is the portuguese word for days.

Yesterday was 2 of Bureacracy, and in Brazil was what the catholics call "Father's Day". And since I was drinking, grateful that I'm no child's father, Our Lady gave me the idea, that we should celebrate that we're no parents! We should drink in name of Eris, for we are not fathers, and we should drink in name of our comrades, that failed in this mission and are fathers. Every "Father's Day", we should apologize to our fathers, for being born. Womens can drink in honor for their friends, that became fathers, and they should apologize with their fathers too. People can tell Dad Jokes, if they want. As we brazilians celebrates in the second sunday of august, the north americans should celebrate on the third sunday of June, just like people from spain shoul celebrate on the 5th of discord, and people from Seychelles on the Confusion 21st. It would be a mutable Whollyday, though.

In Counterpart, women could celebrate the "Thank the goddess I'm not a mother" day. It would be almost the same thing, everybody should apologize with our mother, for being born, and women should drink, because they're not mothers, or drink in honor of they comrades. Men should apologize with their mothers, and drink for their friend who are mothers. Plus, we all should apologize with Eris, for we are all born from Her will, I think. And drink a lot too, well, everybody should drink in every fucking day, and use tons and tons of drugs too. Brazillians celebrate Mother's day on the 2 sunday of may, just like Nort americans. People on Spain would celebrate on the first sunday of may, I don't know about people from Seychelles, though.

That's a proposition for discordians all around the world, we from SHIMO will celebrate it anyway, though, 'cause we like to drink. The problem I see, with the 'Thank the Goddess I'm not a father' day, in Brazil, is that is too close from the Multiversal Undergarment Day. I will basically close my eyes, and hope to people not to apologize with their father in their undergarments, it would be something-I-can-describe.

Be thankful that you're not some kid parent! (Or how we say in portuguese: "Tire a batata do cu e jogue pela janela, quem sabe assim nasce uma árvore de cachorro-quente".

Safety and Peace, brothers and sisters.

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