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Messages - Emo Howard

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Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Free Russian Orphans with Every Purchase
« on: March 20, 2018, 05:55:30 pm »
Why is it that the law enforcement profession attracts some of the biggest chicken shit weasels?

My current operating theory is that our planet has been under the control of bored alien teenagers (or the equivalent thereof for their species) for several millenia. I can't see any other motivation for aliens to intervene on this planet, and I have a hard time seeing us humans getting this far on our own. We're just too goddamn stupid to not be dead yet.

Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Free Russian Orphans with Every Purchase
« on: March 14, 2018, 08:10:09 am »
Well, we had our first test of the "Blue Wave" here in TN, today.

How did that go, you ask?

Final tally:

Trump-loving Republican: 72%

Democrat ATHETIT: 28%

Apple Talk / Re: Pack it in, humans.
« on: March 14, 2018, 08:01:24 am »

What about Bill Nye!

BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL! Bill! Bill. bill... bill...


I'm sorry.

Aneristic Illusions / Re: General Trump hilarity free-for-all thread
« on: March 09, 2018, 07:54:56 am »

OMG! 35 across the U.S. in 2010, and now up to 50! Why isn't Trump doing anything about this!!!1

Aneristic Illusions / Re: General Trump hilarity free-for-all thread
« on: March 09, 2018, 07:47:49 am »
Just had a thought. Trump's supporters haven;t been swayed by the sensible reasons to not support Trump, but they might be swayed by deranged reasons. Specifically, a lot of them are conspiracy nuts so perhaps they could be convinced that the fact that he hasn't shown the world the space aliens they're keeping at Area 51 means that he's one of THEM

He hasn't done shit about the alleged muslim terrorist training camps in Tennessee that people seem to know all about, but can't point to on Goggle Maps, either. Why is that, I wonder?

It seems like it is legal, because they're just threatening not to pass a law.

But...well, it's not a good look for Georgia.  Makes you wonder what other businesses they might target on some spurious political agenda.  That kind of thinking makes companies and investors nervous.  Makes them think about looking for more stable operating environments.

Yeah, but... it's the part where the guy says out loud that he's doing it to hurt a company for political reasons. If he had just said "Gosh, we sure are disappointed in youse guise"....... also, in an unrelated note, we're not doing that thing we were going to do that would have benefited your business. THAT would have been business as usual. Most of politics seems to be sticking it to people who ignore them when they tell them how to live. It's the explicit extortion for political allegiance that's new to me. Maybe I just haven't been paying close enough attention.


Is this a new thing? I can't remember another example of a state or federal government entity openly imposing sanctions against a company because of their political activity. I mean, maybe they did it before and gave some bullshit reason, but never actually just coming right out and explicitly stating "We are punishing you because we don't like your political stance. Get your politics right or suffer the consequences!"

This seems like something that someone should go to prison over.

Aneristic Illusions / Re: General Trump hilarity free-for-all thread
« on: February 26, 2018, 03:57:02 pm »
Samuel L Jackson is laying down the law on this one!

Makes a pretty good point though. Barely trained, armed teachers are not the solution. I don't know what it is but that ain't it.

Robo-Cop style hall monitors, obviously.

"Alexa, lay down suppressive fire."

Apple Talk / Re: Nazi Poetry
« on: February 15, 2018, 09:18:07 am »
Neckbeards with torches
"Fine people", he says. Bullshit.
Kill them with hammers.

Apple Talk / Re: The *REAL* Evil in Today's Society
« on: February 13, 2018, 09:44:38 am »
If I'm not careful with my diet, sometimes I have to reach in and pull it out.

This isn't even a metaphor. :sad:

The first time I realized this one simple trick, I hadn't shat in at least 5 days. I had been binging on laxative for the previous two, which has only caused the enemy to grow larger, yet more pliable. when I finally laid eyes on its corpulent visage, it was one continuous unit approximately two feet in length, and two inches in girth.

I did not regain control of my bowels for a few hours afterwards. Fortunately, I had already called out sick from work. Even more fortunately, my company's policy did not require that I explain the reason for my absence.

Apple Talk / Re: The Compleat Billy Chronicles (thanks to Zenpatista)
« on: February 13, 2018, 09:34:49 am »
So what do you do with all that carbon when it's, err... full?

Can you just lay it out in the sun and let it ventilate itself, and then reuse it?

Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Free Russian Orphans with Every Purchase
« on: February 12, 2018, 06:55:24 pm »
Cops have just raided stores in TN selling CBD. Apparently they think kids were using it to get high.

Here's the press conference that was just webcast live on Facebook.

Aneristic Illusions / Re: General Trump hilarity free-for-all thread
« on: February 06, 2018, 07:27:04 am »
Dow Jones down 1175 points (4.6%).  Everyone grab your asses!

Yeah, my drug money is taking a beating.

And, of course, by drug money I mean money I will need in my old age to buy medicine.

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