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Messages - Cainad (dec.)

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1
Apple Talk / Re: Dear Mr. The Doktor Howl:
« on: December 14, 2017, 05:02:39 am »
While your proposal is creative, we regret to inform you that our company will be unable to assist you in your "topograhical reassignment" of the greater Washington DC area. Your proposed designs to use our drilling and hydrofracturing technologies to create a series of small-scale earthquakes that would spell out the entire First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States in the form of miniature mountain ranges is, unfortunately, not in line with our company's mission.

We should point out that, if we are reading your charts correctly, your plans require exploiting fault zones that are deeper than any such faults that have been mapped previously. As we do not have access to, nor have ever heard of, the proposed "HIMEOBS-grade drilling apparatus" you refer to on page 13, we could not reach these fault zones even if we were assured of their presence.

Additionally, we have found no records of the credentials, or even the existence, of your recommended "on-site supervisory experts." We have been unable to locate the people you refer to on page 24 as "Signor Richtedor" and "ECH Consulting, LLC."

In summary, we are sorry that we cannot help you in achieving your goals. We wish you the best of luck in all future endeavors.

Sincerely,
TerraTech Industries, Inc.

Dear Corporate Swine,

I just now received this in the mail.  It was soggy and hard to read, which is probably because I piss in the mailbox before opening it, to defuse bombs sent by my admirers.

In any case, I assure you that there is no such thing as "HIMEOBS-grade" boring tools.  That part of the request was probably caused by my ungrateful children putting LSD in my breakfast cereal again.  Mind you, this was back when I could eat REAL FOOD, and was more easily fooled.

In any case, I have decided that the country doesn't need the first amendment.  They have come right out and said so.  Instead, I'd like to frack in Beverly Hills.  Send me a quote.

Sincerely,
Martin Bormann

Dear Mr Bormann,

There has been some restructuring of things here at The Company since last we spoke. In fact, I am very glad indeed to have the opportunity to touch base with you, as there were clearly some missed opportunities that we would like to make good on. Can't leave "money on the table," as they say. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Please be aware that our corporate entity has since merged with and joined The Good FolksTM and will be glad to receive your future proposals. We will consider everything that crosses our desk. Nothing is out of scope, and if it is out of scope, we will Find The Money anyway.

Sincerely,
Inc.
"Service so good, you won't even remember your teeth."

2
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: December 14, 2017, 04:53:25 am »
Well, at least Sorweel should come out of things OK.  Unless he literally runs into the No-God or goes on to kill Kelhus, that boy's unstoppable.

Well that was fucking prophetic.

 :lulz: Fucking hell.

3
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: October 23, 2017, 05:29:33 pm »
Khellus grasped the Gnosis, literally a knowing of the Divine. He assumed it could all fall within the scope of the Logos, that the Dunyain were not fundamentally wrong about Cause and Effect, merely lacking the necessary knowledge to grasp it in totality. He worked on the assumption that the Outside could be manipulated by intellect, the same way that the World could be. That the Outside could be made to “walk Conditioned ground,” as they say. But I think that in gaining the perspective of the Gods, he gained their very same blindness: he couldn’t perceive the No-God.

Up until the end I had assumed that Kelmomas and his dickery was the work of Ajokli. Oops.

I read the first book back in high school, I think the same year it was published. 2005-ish? I’m 27 now. R.S. Bakker is a sonovabitch and I think I love him.

4
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: October 23, 2017, 02:56:03 pm »
No problem.  In that case....

WHAT

THE

FUCK

JUST

HAPPENED

Everything fell logically into place, as far as I can see.  It all makes a terrifying amount of sense, the end of The Unholy Consult.  That the Consult would take Dunyain alive was incredibly foolish, but once they did, it sealed their own fate.  The tekne and the Dunyain philosophy are too close...that's assuming the Mutiliated are still Dunyain, and not Shaeonara possessing them. 

Proyas was being set-up all along.  He was the scapegoat, the fall-man designed to take the blame for the decision to eat Sranc.  His breaking was necessary, to make that step possible, and once it was done, he served the purpose of dying to redeem the Great Ordeal.

Kellhus was trying to save the world, and his plan was actually quite brilliant.  The gods could not see the threat, so he used the daimos to travel to the Outside, and made pacts with the pit.  Ajokli's summoning at the topos that is Golgotterath completely negated the advantages of the Consult and their chorae-armed skin spies, and is one of the most chilling scenes in a series full of them.

And then, Kelmomnas ruins it all, as he ruins everything.  Of course he's the No God.  No wonder the Narindar couldn't see him, couldn't react to him.  Once he was on the path to becoming the No-God, he was always the No-God, and so always invisible to the Hundred.  Ajokli intended to use the Consult as the lash to drive nations to despair, but he very conveniently abandons Kellhus at a key moment (very conveniently indeed, considering he cannot see the No-God).  Whether Kellhus had a contingency for this it's hard to say, but at the very least he is now a Ciphrang in the Outside, which means his part may not be over just yet.  And then of course, Ajokli is now also loose in the world, in the body of Cnauir, which makes a terrifying amount of sense.

Finished. The appendices tricked me into thinking I had farther to go than I did.

So, in conclusion


Um.


what?


So What Comes After always did rule What Comes Before. But if Mog-Pharau does its work and the goal of Ark/The Consult is realized, then that will cease to be true once the World is shut against the Outside... I think?

5
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: September 13, 2017, 02:33:05 pm »
Cainad, have you finished TUC yet?  Because I want to drop spoilers.

Whoops, missed this!

No, I haven't finished but I can easily avoid this thread until I do. Spoil away!

6
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: July 23, 2017, 09:52:23 am »
Trying to convince my band to change our name to Mog-Pharau

Sent from my SM-G955U using Tapatalk

I once generated a Minecraft map using "Mog-Pharau" as the seed string. It generated a giant ocean, with nothing except a half-dozen small mushroom-covered islands scattered about in the emptiness.

Bakker scores points in my fantasy trope book for totally nailing the "Blessed With Suck" trope for the Nonmen. Immortality blows ASS, and the full extent of how much ass it blows gets loads of detail in The Great Ordeal.

7
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: July 07, 2017, 05:34:09 pm »
Thanks to Cain, I have been forced to start this series from the beginning (meaning the first book of the Prince of Nothing series) and now I have a lot of reading ahead of me so I don't appreciate that and Cain should feel bad (and subsidize the cost of these books). But at least I don't have to worry about what I'm going to read next for the next eight years or so.

I pulled the first book off a bookstore shelf when I was in 9th grade because the cover looked cool. It is no exaggeration to say that this series has influenced my development into a horrible person. I think you'll have a great time with it.

8
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: July 07, 2017, 12:07:33 pm »
OK, so, The Unholy Consult.  Wow.  That was an ending.  And then some. 

I really can't say anything without spoilering the shit out of what happened, except I will say Meppa was nowhere to be seen.  So I can only assume he has been secreted away somewhere by Kelhus and has a role to play in the final trilogy.  And as the Last Cishaurim, with power enough to even wow Kelhus, I can't imagine his role being minor.

Yeah, given what Khellus intuited about the Cishaurim at the end of TTT and how the Dunyain couldn't master the Psukhe, I'd expect Meppa to be SOMEONE'S ace in the hole. Either Khellus's or someone else's.

Seeing Khellus having truly run out of Fucks To Give about the crapsack world he lives in is... well, I guess I should have seen it coming, but it's so at odds with the unstoppable force he's painted as in the first trilogy that it's hard to imagine him at the end of his rope, as he seems to be by the end of The Great Ordeal.

TUC is gonna have to wait until I'm back from China and recovered from jet lag, but I am excite.

9
Apple Talk / Re: Open Bar: Fake News, Fake Bar
« on: July 06, 2017, 05:19:37 pm »
This "Hobby Lobby gets busted for illicit trade in thousands of ancient artifacts" shit is the first thing I woke up to this morning, and now I feel like my whole brain has been knocked off-center.

10
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: July 02, 2017, 03:21:16 pm »
4 days until The Unholy Consult is released.

Given the last book ended with a nuke going off, I can't wait to see what happens in this one.  I'm expecting the kind of wham ending we saw with The Thousandfold Thought.  As to what that will be...who can say?

SHIT I FORGOT IT'S JULY

Well I guess I know what I'm doing when I get back from vacation. I already have bookmarks in three other books that I'm dead-set on finishing soon, but some things are more important.

Huh, on Amazon it says it comes out the 25th? Happy Birthday to me, in any case.

BTW, have you encountered any good sum-ups or analyses of the series so far, especially including the ending of the last book? I need a refresher since I've been filling my brain with Malazan while waiting for these books to come out.

11
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: July 02, 2017, 03:16:40 pm »
4 days until The Unholy Consult is released.

Given the last book ended with a nuke going off, I can't wait to see what happens in this one.  I'm expecting the kind of wham ending we saw with The Thousandfold Thought.  As to what that will be...who can say?

SHIT I FORGOT IT'S JULY

Well I guess I know what I'm doing when I get back from vacation. I already have bookmarks in three other books that I'm dead-set on finishing soon, but some things are more important.

Huh, on Amazon it says it comes out the 25th? Happy Birthday to me, in any case.

12
Apple Talk / Re: ITT: I am RESURRCTED! AMA
« on: July 02, 2017, 03:04:03 pm »
Does this mean I have to go back in the box? :sad:

13
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: June 10, 2017, 03:08:26 pm »
Reading all sorts of stuff from the Black Wings of Cthulhu anthologies collected and edited by S.T. Joshi. Full of great weird fiction stories. Really inspiring stuff, and the little introductions by Joshi at the beginning of each book are great too.

I should get back to that collection, it didn't really click for me at the time I was reading it.

Joshi is a excellent Lovecraft historian though; the Penguin Classics collections of HPL's stories are LOADED with annotations that made the stories much more enjoyable for a modern reader to appreciate.

14
Literate Chaotic / Re: Unofficial What are you Reading Thread?
« on: June 09, 2017, 04:02:34 pm »
A little over halfway through Dictionary of the Khazars, and I think I've identified what I like so much about it (other than being premium-quality High Weirdness):

It reads like a historical fantasy book written by someone who doesn't read fantasy books. Which, if you consume as much fantasy trash as I do, is incredibly refreshing.

15
Apple Talk / Re: Sadly, this is NOT a Bruce Springsteen gag.
« on: May 23, 2017, 12:36:34 pm »
God damn it.

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