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Messages - Reverend Loveshade

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16
Or Kill Me / Re: She apparently likes me.
« on: August 06, 2008, 06:13:40 pm »
Quote
Eris is a MOTHERFUCKING BITCH. 

Or the fairies are. Or the Grand Sense of Humor that Rules the Universe. Somebody thinks I'm funny.

Since wandering into the Discordian pie-stand, I have observed the following:

-Weird shit happening....
I would say I like what you wrote, but considering how wonderfully friendly some people are around here to me no matter what I post, I'll refrain.

Here's a couple answers I've heard from Christians who believe Satan is everywhere waiting to get you (although I'm translating from God to Goddess, and from Satan to Greyface).  Choose one:

1) If your heart were truly right with Goddess, Greyface wouldn't be able to touch you like that.  If Greyface is able to get you that much, the reason you're having so many problems is because you aren't right with Goddess.  Your problems mean you're doing Bad!

2) Now that you're with Goddess, Greyface doesn't like it.  So Greyface is really going after you to try to get you back.  That's why you're having so many problems.  Your problems mean you're doing Good!


You old fraud.  You spout off how Old Skool you are, but the above post runs counter to all POEE Cabal teachings as found in the Principia Discordia.

Greyface is the embodiment of Order and Deadly Seriousness.  Eris is the embodiment of Chaos and Weirdness and Damnded Things That Can't be Cataloged.

To place the reasons for the Weird Shit happening to Cal on Greyface clearly shows your ignorance of the Old Ways of Discordia.

So STFU and GTFO.

DAMN IT!  Somebody finally caught me.  I was using the old Chairman Mao trick: "Cloak the revolution in the clothing of the past."  But as you found me out, I might as well admit it.  I'm really a Born-Again, Spirit-Filled, Pinko-Communist-Fascist, LeftWinged-RightWinger, Kabalan Neo Nazi Anarchist Discordian who's never even been to a Starbucks.

17
Or Kill Me / Re: She apparently likes me.
« on: August 06, 2008, 01:00:24 am »
I would say I like what you wrote, but considering how wonderfully friendly some people are around here to me no matter what I post, I'll refrain.

We're that way with pedos....

Life sucks.  Wear a hat.
Thanks for the hat-wearing advice in the second part.

As for the first part, ah, that old accusation once again.  How about if every time someone brings that up, I post a link to my response at http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=16668.131  (Because of how links work here, you may have to manually scroll down to post 131)

18
Or Kill Me / Re: She apparently likes me.
« on: August 06, 2008, 12:43:28 am »
Quote
Quote from: Reverend Loveshade on Today at 02:54:22 PM

"Threats should not be tolerated. They're demeaning, they're violations to human rights and no one deserves them."

 nice sig does it apply to under age girls?

Yes.  It applies to everybody.  Even to you.  :)

19
Or Kill Me / Re: She apparently likes me.
« on: August 05, 2008, 10:54:22 pm »
Quote
Eris is a MOTHERFUCKING BITCH. 

Or the fairies are. Or the Grand Sense of Humor that Rules the Universe. Somebody thinks I'm funny.

Since wandering into the Discordian pie-stand, I have observed the following:

-Weird shit happening....
I would say I like what you wrote, but considering how wonderfully friendly some people are around here to me no matter what I post, I'll refrain.

Here's a couple answers I've heard from Christians who believe Satan is everywhere waiting to get you (although I'm translating from God to Goddess, and from Satan to Greyface).  Choose one:

1) If your heart were truly right with Goddess, Greyface wouldn't be able to touch you like that.  If Greyface is able to get you that much, the reason you're having so many problems is because you aren't right with Goddess.  Your problems mean you're doing Bad!

2) Now that you're with Goddess, Greyface doesn't like it.  So Greyface is really going after you to try to get you back.  That's why you're having so many problems.  Your problems mean you're doing Good!

20
Or Kill Me / Re: Knowing we are Free
« on: August 05, 2008, 10:39:30 pm »
Dear Loveshade

You are not, and never will be, funny.

Kill yourself.

Thanks in Advance,
RBoG

You mean you thought that was supposed to be funny?

21
Or Kill Me / Re: Knowing we are Free
« on: August 04, 2008, 11:54:25 am »

You know Rev, you really come across like an insightful dude. We really don't take enough time around here to give you the credit you deserve.

So....oh, wow, I'm sorry if I'm a little awkward in asking this. I don't want to be too forward, but...

can I watch you, umm, well... jack off some time?

I mean, I'm totally cool with it if you don't want to, cuz it's kinda queer, but I really feel like it would be a real bonding experience. Really, I just can't get enough of seeing you bring yourself pleasure. It's a thing of beauty, and seeing someone of such intelligence and grace is truly it's own reward....

Thank you for your kind words and your interest.  This is the type of inquiry I often receive on my own website, where I am the King of Everything and everybody loves and worships me.

Because I am asked this question so frequently, my agents have scheduled a showing.  If you are interested in attending a public performance, you can get tickets to "Reverend Loveshade's 537 Ways of Self-Pleasuring," which is scheduled to go on an international tour in spring of 2009.  Stops on our tour include Carnegie Hall in New York City, America; the National Centre for the Performing Arts in Beijing, China; the Kyoto Kaikan in Kyoto, Japan; the National Theatre of Korea in Seoul, South Korea; and the Théâtre des Champs-Elysées in Paris, France.  Tickets will be available exclusively through Ticket Master beginning August 23 of this year.

If you were hoping for free tickets, please submit 250 words on the topic, "Why I want to see Reverend Loveshade self-pleasuring."  Your entry will be entered in our contest with the winner announced on August 22.  There is no entry fee, but the winner does agree to pay all applicable taxes.

Thank you once again for your interest, and Have a Nice Day.

Yours Sincerely,

Reverend "tongue planted firmly in cheeky" Loveshade

22
Or Kill Me / Re: Knowing we are Free
« on: August 04, 2008, 11:49:53 am »
You know Rev, you're kinda ruining it for the parts of the forum that don't hate your guts.

I didn't intend to.  I meant that as a quite sincere, if tongue in cheek compliment to those who contributed to what I found a fascinating discussion.

23
Or Kill Me / Re: Who are you anyway ?
« on: August 03, 2008, 06:50:30 am »
I just found this quote.  Don't know if the source is accurate or not, but if the quote fits....

"When a man of true Genius appears in the World, you may know him by this infallible Sign, that all the Dunces are in Conspiracy against him."

- Jonathan Swift

24
Propaganda Depository / Re: Radio Free Discordia
« on: August 03, 2008, 06:13:57 am »
Just saw this thread--cool.  I'll put out a notice out of what's up.

I've got a friend who did DJing, voices for radio skits, wrote radio commercials and jingles and the like, but isn't doing broadcasting right now.  Probably couldn't do a regular show, unfortunately, but has some really weird stuff that no one would touch--how far over the wall can we go with this?

25
Principia Discussion / Re: New Oldskool Discordian Text?
« on: August 03, 2008, 05:30:23 am »
DrJon: So what on Earth would you know about Discordian oldskool?  Who the hell are you, anyway?  Some high faluting n00b? Did you gather together oldskool and newskool writings and put them in a book, such as Apocrypha Discordia?  Do you help get the long-missing 'The Myth of Starbuck' and the first edition of Principia Discordia into our hot little hands?  Huh?  Did ya?

Oh.  You did?

Nevermind.

26
Or Kill Me / Re: Who are you anyway ?
« on: August 03, 2008, 05:22:28 am »
This is a counterthought of a much older post of mine where I called upon the statistically-expected geniuses of the world to Get Up And Do Something Already: with 6 billion people alive, we should have about as many Great Artists / Scientists as there have been during the last several millenia, yet we don't, so I shall blame them for their own inaptitude at living up to my mathematically-backed expectations of them. This text thakes the opposite stand: that we do not have those many geniuses, and why. Maybe playing on those two conflicting views can bring something up in unsuspecting readers ?

Assuming that there are the same percentage of geniuses as in the past, and assuming that not as high of a percentage of them do great work:

In science, things have changed.  As a friend of mine who is a scientist explained it to me, in Albert Einstein's day, a scientist could get money because, "I want to check this out because it looks interesting and we might learn something."

Nowadays, science has turned into a business.  "How will your project help national defense?  Is it going to give us a worthwhile energy source?"   Einstein essentially said, "Well, if this element existed, which it doesn't, and if this process were possible, which it probably isn't, it might do something interesting but I really don't know what."  Had Einstein been forced to answer those questions before getting any money to do the thinking and research that transformed both national defense and energy (atomic bomb/nuclear power), Albert might have been a plumber.

27
Or Kill Me / Re: Knowing we are Free
« on: August 03, 2008, 05:09:42 am »
St. Verbatim: It took me a while to get it up (where's my Viagra?), but I just posted "Knowing we are Free" on our site.  For those who don't know, Verbatim gave me permission.  It's at (WARNING: LINK COMING!) http://discordia.loveshade.org/xtra/wearefree.html

By the way, I don't know if this piece is copyrighted or not--please let me know so I can put the appropriate notice on the page.

As to the discussion here, careful, people.  If you have too many thoughtful, intelligent discussions like this (or at least most of this, which I loved reading, by the way), other people might get the idea you're more than just a single-minded group of hateful, loud nasty flamers.

28
Or Kill Me / Re: Civility vs Decency
« on: July 26, 2008, 01:52:50 am »
Quote
Presumably Letts would have us all drink tea with our little finger's sticking out while discussing the pro's and con's of torture and genocide as well.

That's the mark of a civilized person, that you can be more barbaric than the barbarians as long as you follow proper social decorum.

I prefer my morals carrying knives and dressed in loin cloths.  More honest.

Nice rant, by the way.

29
GASM Command / Re: POSTERGASM
« on: July 10, 2008, 06:11:53 am »
IDEAS NEEDED:

I just found that the bulletin board with the WANTED posters in it is in a short hallway between the main library and the federal courthouse in my town.  I HAVE to put some stuff there. 

The bulletin board in enclosed in glass, so it will be a tape-it-on-as-you-walk-by job.

I hate to rain on the proverbial parade, but I'd be very careful what you post in any government facility in America (or elsewhere, for that matter).  They often have hidden cameras, and any tampering with federal government stuff is considered a federal offense.

Post something on a local telephone pole, and about the worst you'll get is a fine, which likely won't happen.

30
Or Kill Me / Re: Knowing we are Free
« on: June 30, 2008, 03:10:00 am »
That's a great little anecdote, Rev.
Go ahead and yoink the piece. Mentioning I wrote it would be nice, but only if it fits your format.

We'll give you credit, definitely.  Do you want to be called Verbatim, St. Verbatim?

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