46
Apple Zone / Re: Open Bar VII: written by George Lucas!
« on: April 29, 2013, 09:49:11 pm »
man, prepayment meters sound awesome compared with that shit.
News:
MysticWicks endorsement: ""Oooh, I'm a Discordian! I can do whatever I want! Which means I can just SAY I'm a pagan but I never bother doing rituals or studying any kind of sacred texts or developing a relationship with deity, etc! I can go around and not be Christian, but I won't quite be anything else either because I just can't commit and I can't be ARSED to commit!"
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47
Aneristic Illusions / Re: So much fucking rage fuel, here. Can't even see straight.
« on: April 29, 2013, 09:47:49 pm »
Not watching the video, but holy fuckballs.
48
Apple Zone / Re: Conquest of the Planet of the Bride of the Son of the Return of the Open Bar
« on: April 29, 2013, 09:22:27 pm »prepayment meters have been a thing as long as i remember. I remember my mum getting a rebate every quarter ALL IN 50 PENCE PIECES. you can get gas ones too. Ahh, growing up in poverty.I was eating.
It happens.
Though I may need to depart again soon to undertake domestic chores.
It's hard to get false slack past Pixie.
Eating is no excuse. I just strap a feed bag on my face and hork down while I say rotten shit to people. I don't need my mouth to type (though it IS more efficient that way).
damn straight on the false slack. Today i drew up a rota for new flatmate, payne and myself, did the monthly bills calculation and a little space to say if it's been paid, and a who paid how much on the prepayment electric meter.
Prepayment electric meter?
there's a little electronic stick you take to the store to buy electric. They make poor people have them in the UK. Was here when we moved in.
Wow. Your country is almost as fucked as ours is.
But but but!
It's kind enough to beep at you very quietly to let you know when you're about to run out of money!
And and and!
They only charge you sliiiiiightly more per kilowatt/hour if you run out of credit.
I ain't never heard of such a thing. Unless you count the extra fee people in certain income brackets have to pay to get their utilities turned on in the first place.
it'll cost a massive deposit fee to get it switched to a normal meter.
49
Apple Zone / Re: Payne, all your Pixie issues SOLVED in 9 easy payments!
« on: April 29, 2013, 08:50:22 pm »What have I told you?
NO MORE ROBOTIC PUSSIES!
BUT I WANT A MECHA KITTEN!
50
Apple Zone / Re: Conquest of the Planet of the Bride of the Son of the Return of the Open Bar
« on: April 29, 2013, 08:49:41 pm »I was eating.
It happens.
Though I may need to depart again soon to undertake domestic chores.
It's hard to get false slack past Pixie.
Eating is no excuse. I just strap a feed bag on my face and hork down while I say rotten shit to people. I don't need my mouth to type (though it IS more efficient that way).
damn straight on the false slack. Today i drew up a rota for new flatmate, payne and myself, did the monthly bills calculation and a little space to say if it's been paid, and a who paid how much on the prepayment electric meter.
Prepayment electric meter?
there's a little electronic stick you take to the store to buy electric. They make poor people have them in the UK. Was here when we moved in.
51
Apple Zone / Re: Payne, all your Pixie issues SOLVED in 9 easy payments!
« on: April 29, 2013, 08:48:34 pm »Get her a Chia-TGRR. Everyone loves Chia-TGRR. It shows up as an oversized, vaguely humanoid lump. Water it daily, and watch the hair grow out of places you didn't know you had places! Hours of fun for the whole family and Pix will forgive your various and sundry transgressions.
Warning: England is the absolute perfect climate for Chia-TGRR, so do NOT leave outside, on account of what happened to Machu Pichu. Southampton would be overgrown in days, and then you'd have to fuck off to the Midlands until the Spaniards arrive to convert everyone.
Do not put your Chia-Roger where it can see a television, as we cannot be held responsible for the results of its blind rage. Do not attempt to comb your Chia-TGRR, as severe damage to your hands may result. Hose your Chia-TGRR down with Malathion once per week to minimize various vermin infestations.
Call today. Supplies are limited. Nine easy payments of YOUR VERY SANITY and it's yours to enjoy forever.
Sign me up!
Pixie is always pestering me for a pet, and the stick I found outside and called Ryan The Stick Insect is not longer doing the business.
A mecha kitten would do. Needs batteries and wont puke hairballs on the carpet.
52
Apple Zone / Re: Payne, all your Pixie issues SOLVED in 9 easy payments!
« on: April 29, 2013, 08:11:19 pm »Get her a Chia-TGRR. Everyone loves Chia-TGRR. It shows up as an oversized, vaguely humanoid lump. Water it daily, and watch the hair grow out of places you didn't know you had places! Hours of fun for the whole family and Pix will forgive your various and sundry transgressions.
Warning: England is the absolute perfect climate for Chia-TGRR, so do NOT leave outside, on account of what happened to Machu Pichu. Southampton would be overgrown in days, and then you'd have to fuck off to the Midlands until the Spaniards arrive to convert everyone.
Do not put your Chia-Roger where it can see a television, as we cannot be held responsible for the results of its blind rage. Do not attempt to comb your Chia-TGRR, as severe damage to your hands may result. Hose your Chia-TGRR down with Malathion once per week to minimize various vermin infestations.
Call today. Supplies are limited. Nine easy payments of YOUR VERY SANITY and it's yours to enjoy forever.
Can i use it to scare New Housemate if he acts up?
53
Apple Zone / Re: Conquest of the Planet of the Bride of the Son of the Return of the Open Bar
« on: April 29, 2013, 08:09:37 pm »I was eating.
It happens.
Though I may need to depart again soon to undertake domestic chores.
It's hard to get false slack past Pixie.
Eating is no excuse. I just strap a feed bag on my face and hork down while I say rotten shit to people. I don't need my mouth to type (though it IS more efficient that way).
damn straight on the false slack. Today i drew up a rota for new flatmate, payne and myself, did the monthly bills calculation and a little space to say if it's been paid, and a who paid how much on the prepayment electric meter.
54
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Call the cops, get evicted
« on: April 29, 2013, 08:06:31 pm »And why aren't the freemarketfags railing against this!?
This isn't 4chan.
^THIS^
Also, misogyny/ not thinking it applies to them. That's why they aren't going RAARGH.
55
Apple Zone / Re: Attn: Roger
« on: April 29, 2013, 05:29:01 pm »Also, expect the pint as soon as I can figure out how to mail a full pint glass to AZ using only standard envelopes.
Unless you fancy grabbing helping me grab it off him when you're next in Blighty.
Might be soon. I've been contacted about a training job that does a shitpile of work in Southampton, London, and a few other cities on that benighted flyspeck you call an island.
Should I take the job, I'll be there 3-5 months out of the year, which I can assure you will be more fun than you really wanted.
YAY!
56
Apple Zone / Re: Attn: Roger
« on: April 29, 2013, 05:28:28 pm »Also, expect the pint as soon as I can figure out how to mail a full pint glass to AZ using only standard envelopes.
Unless you fancy grabbing helping me grab it off him when you're next in Blighty.
Roger should totally tackle Boris Johnson.
57
Apple Zone / Re: ITT: YELL AT GOGIRA UNTIL SHE FINISHES HER WORK
« on: April 29, 2013, 04:55:02 pm »
LESS FAFFING, MOAR WORKING!
58
Apple Zone / Re: Conquest of the Planet of the Bride of the Son of the Return of the Open Bar
« on: April 29, 2013, 04:53:31 pm »
I HAVE PROPER BROADBAND!
it takes less than 30 seconds to load a page.
OOh, get me, all bourgois and shit.
it takes less than 30 seconds to load a page.
OOh, get me, all bourgois and shit.
59
Apple Zone / Re: Attn: Roger
« on: April 27, 2013, 11:56:31 pm »I have.
It's making slightly horny.
Pretty sure there's a Rain God in your area who can help with that.
This goddess is in mooncup week.
60
Apple Zone / Re: Quotes of the Moment II
« on: April 27, 2013, 03:14:22 pm »My 13-year-old son is more mature and capable than most adults I know.
But then, he was kind of born a 30-year-old lawyer.
He thinks I'm silly.
I kind of love serious sensible teenagers.