I have decided to share my world with you all, as my views will never get published. Only because I don't acknowledge their existance. Maybe you will love me for who I am. I am about to speak the unpublished words of Eric the Transexual.
Firstly, there is no such thing as a non-Penis bearing human. Eris as you know her is really Eric the Transexual.
My first encounter was in the shower, I was washing my sexy calf, but I accidently dropped the soap - and Eric promptly came up from behind.
After my enlightening experience, he imparted on wisdoms from ancients past; I saw that all there is, is Eric and everything else is and/or isn't Eric. People keep mistaking Eric as a female, he was quite upset about that But he has grown to love it. Even embrace it, sometimes s/he resents it. I can't tell anymore. It does not matter!
Anyhow, Eric told me "They will show their acceptance by outrightedly refusing what you say. Or maybe they won't, no one cares at this stage"
Shocked I continued on, "What do you want with me?"
Eric said "Everyones a Discordian. Just like everyone is gay, they may not know it. May not acknowledge it, they may refuse it but they still are Gay"
I asked "What if I refuse it?"
"It does not matter, you are my bitch!"
A few thousand ticks later, I was drying myself - and the prophetic words came to me on a google search.
After plagerising and fixing up Nostradamus's words - it read
"The young poop will overcome the greater one,
On the field in Japan during the fifth day;
Golden Apples run rampant there, but no one is gay
He lives a cruel life. "
I freaked out, I realised why Eric has chosen me! I must awaken up those who deny themselves.
After wandering around aimlessly, I found my way on the shores here. I aimed for entrance, but I was denied!
Fruitlessly, I started to search for the Principia Discordia book ... but it hasn't been sold for 2 years, so I placed an Order; and it will come around The Aftermath 75.
So until then, I will listen to the whispers of Eric and my words will be the real deal!
Until then ...
I'm damn clueless
I forget what my point was, but this is how Eric wanted it. Eris says hi and um ... I love you all?