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Messages - Nepos twiddletonis

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12346
The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: It's Britney, Bitch!
« on: September 27, 2011, 11:42:47 pm »
Hey dude, how's things in Bulgaria?

12347
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Commit a crime, go to church
« on: September 27, 2011, 11:41:29 pm »
What's got your panties in a bunch?

That people expect me to not wear panties. I'm a dude, it's considered unsightly. So this "normalcy" character won't let me bunch up my panties. It's an all-around unpleasant experience. But then if I were allowed to wear panties, I'd be satisfied and there would be no need for bunching.

It's like a catch-22 for women's underthings, if you catch my drifty-drafty boxers. But that's for another, more private discussion.

I would definitely go to a church where they charged for drinks, assuming the drink is substantially larger than the thimble they insist on serving the blood of Christ in.

He's only human and only has so much blood to go around sir. He needs to keep some of it so he can regenerate and serve up some more next Sunday.

12348
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Commit a crime, go to church
« on: September 27, 2011, 10:42:14 pm »
While I understand the hilarity, what exactly is the (hypothetical) goal here?

1. Set up a Discordian Church in Alabama
2. Receive criminals for 1h per week on a sunday
3. ????
4. :lulz:



Why, to provide a place for people to go who both don't want to go to jail or go to a boring old Christian church where they will try and make you repent of your sins.

12349
Aneristic Illusions / Re: They arent even pretending to care any more...
« on: September 27, 2011, 10:16:17 pm »
I just cant get over the idea that anyone would be converted at a Christian Rap concert.
I'm sure plenty of people have been converted at Christian rap concerts, though mostly in the opposite of the intended direction of conversion.

Upon hearing B-Shoc at a Christian Music Festival that he attended for the purpose of trying to score with a girl by the name of Mae Rae, Jimmy John decided to sell his soul to Satan for black magic powers and buy as many Burzum albums as he could.

And he ended up scoring, since Mae Rae thought she could change him from his diabolical ways.

12350
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Commit a crime, go to church
« on: September 27, 2011, 09:40:05 pm »
"Oh yeah, your honor. He was here all day. got nice and filled up with the spirit he did."

12351
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Commit a crime, go to church
« on: September 27, 2011, 09:39:00 pm »
This is awesome  :lulz:

http://www2.wkrg.com/news/2011/sep/22/serve-time-jailor-church-ar-2450720/

Quote
BAY MINETTE, Alabama --
Non-violent offenders in Bay Minette now have a choice some would call simple: do time behind bars or work off the sentence in church.

Operation Restore Our Community or "ROC"...begins next week. The city judge will either let  misdemenor offenders work off their sentences in jail and pay a fine or go to church every Sunday for a year.

If offenders elect church, they're allowed to pick the place of worship, but must check in weekly with the pastor and the police department. If the one-year church attendance program is completed successfully, the offender's case will be dismissed.

The program is constitutional, because the offenders aren't forced to go to church, and they choose the church.  They have a choice between going to jail, paying a fine, and having a criminal record, or remaining free except for one hour every Sunday and having no criminal record.

PMZ,
needs to open a combination church/sports bar in Bay Minette with video poker machines and a two-drink minimum during the Sunday service, which consists of watching football on big screen TVs.

Get a ULC certificate and open up a Temple to Dionysus.  :lulz:

12352
Aneristic Illusions / Re: They arent even pretending to care any more...
« on: September 27, 2011, 09:28:32 pm »
Oh dear god....

I just watched Jesus Lean. I've come to the following conclusions:

White people aren't allowed to rap.
People in general are not allowed to rap about Jesus.
White people really are incapable of dancing.
Christians appear to have a tendency toward higher BMIs.
Christians in Christian rap videos are either under 15 or over 65. Unless your the Sheriff.

I'm going to watch teh other two, aren't I?

Yep.  For SCIENCE!

Lord help me I watched them and now I have Christ-like Cruising stuck in my head.

PMZ is right too. It's all about the brand name.

I must inflict this on others.

12353
Aneristic Illusions / Re: They arent even pretending to care any more...
« on: September 27, 2011, 09:13:47 pm »
Oh dear god....

I just watched Jesus Lean. I've come to the following conclusions:

White people aren't allowed to rap.
People in general are not allowed to rap about Jesus.
White people really are incapable of dancing.
Christians appear to have a tendency toward higher BMIs.
Christians in Christian rap videos are either under 15 or over 65. Unless your the Sheriff.

I'm going to watch teh other two, aren't I?

12354
Aneristic Illusions / Re: They arent even pretending to care any more...
« on: September 27, 2011, 09:06:02 pm »
Quote
New Heights Middle School in Jefferson, South Carolina, featured the rapper during an assembly that took place earlier this month. B-SHOC's catalog of songs includes titles such as "Jesus Lean'," "Crazy Bout God," and "Christ-Like Cruisin."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7cAYV_lVNI&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvyO4HyQofc&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8D7iT2MT00o

 :lulz:
LOL, no actual Christian message in those songs at all.  He's just promoting Christianity as a brand.  The choice between Christianity and other religions is the same as the choice between Ford and Chevrolet, Coke and Pepsi, or Nike and Reebok.

What, like, New and Improved JudaismTM?  :lulz:

12355
Aneristic Illusions / Re: Bizarro Parties
« on: September 27, 2011, 09:03:41 pm »
I guess I would be ah... problem with this is that I'm registered Green. So, I don't know if it were the other way around for third parties where the economic angle was reversed, I'd be a (legitimate) Libertarian. You don't really find that many conservative socialist parties out there.

Though, that might be a funny idea to hash out.

12356
High Weirdness / Re: Janus Cat
« on: September 27, 2011, 08:55:16 pm »
Cool, it's in Worcester too. I can put that on my list of weird things about/from Massachusetts.

Also, I'm starting to get disheartened that absolutely every news story is turned into a chance to make a political joke in the comments.

12357
The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: WOMP-ertainment
« on: September 27, 2011, 08:44:19 pm »
I IS TEABAGGER NAO.  MY POWERZ OF DOUCHEBAGGERY REIGN ALL YALL.  BOW DOWN BEFORE ME AND KNOW MY LEET BAGGIN' HACKIN' SKEELZ.

:D 

Thanks, Twid!

Lol, no problem!

12358
The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: Jenne and Khara
« on: September 27, 2011, 08:27:29 pm »
 :lulz: yeah it's the one thing that time travel fiction always overlooks. When you're going is not in the same where.

12359
The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: WOMP-ertainment
« on: September 27, 2011, 08:21:13 pm »

12360
The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: WOMP-ertainment
« on: September 27, 2011, 07:59:42 pm »


Do you KNOW I almost did this when they picketed my kid's school last week?  :lulz:

 :lulz: Seriously? Man, I guessed well then

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