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Topics - Don Coyote

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106
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100910/ap_on_re_us/us_gays_in_military

I guess being gay has no bearing on your combat readiness.

Also a bunch of gay Republicans seem to be behind this.



ETA: I just read this over due to he lack of emoticons, I might be coming off as opposed to this. Which I am not. I think this judge is right.

107
Or Kill Me / Why I hate the western martial arts community
« on: September 06, 2010, 06:45:52 am »
This is a rant most people won't give a shit about. So fucking what. And those that might have an opinion on this subject will most likely disagree with me. Again, so fucking what.

The biggest reason I hate the general western martial arts community is the rampant clichism and circle-jerking back-patting. Hurray you can translate medieval dialects of German or Italian. I mean that is fucking rad. I can barely understand modern German, and without your help I wouldn't be able to go, "dude you are fucking wrong here"

Which brings me to the next thing. Academics thinking that because they could translate some old books they are now qualified to teach martially sound interpretations of this old books. Dude, your fucking measure is wrong. Your timing is wrong. And wtf do you think you are doing cutting from guard to guard? Just an fyi, swords are metal. Metal is harder than skin. Guess which wins? Ya, the sword. You don;'t need to cut from fucking vom Tag to Alber or Nebenhut to kill someone. No really. I am sure once you cut about 12 inches into his chest from his clavicle he might not be able to fight. I'm pretty sure you can do that a blunt, never mind a sharp sword.

Oh and on that note. Test cutting. WHAT THE FUCK??? You wanted to break from EMA but now you are aping what bad JSA dojos do? Just an FYI sure it's fun, but the Japanese only did it to prove the BLADE. That is right douchebag. Test cutting is a test of the sword. Being able to cleanly cut a non-moving roll of soaking wet tatami doesn't really mean anything. Well it does. It means you are fixated on looking cool. Cuz it is fucking cool to cut shit with your fucking sword. I know this. It is. I used to love just practicing cuts. But just an FYI for you. You don't need to cleanly cut someone to fuck them up enough to make them dead. You aren't trying to fucking make a gourmet meal with exquisitely cut garnish. You are CUTTING ANOTHER PERSON INTO PIECES, or at least training as if you were going to.

Which brings me to unarmored sparring. Hey why not, I mean you are training to fight with swords, swords are sexy. Armor is expensive. So hey just use your blossfechten training with a minimum of training gear. Ya...no. You are going to start making compromises somewhere. You will start trying to pad your weapon, so it won't act like a steel blade, which matters for winding, which you practice right? So you start to add more protective gear, cuz you don't want to get crush fingers, but hey those gloves mean you don't have to the full dexterity in your hands. But hey all that can be trained around. But what's that? You don't want to bother even doing drills so you can internalize the techniques? You want to start fighting NAO? You are a douche. You one of those guys on youtube posting videos about how you understand Liechtenaurer but nothing you do matches up with anything any of the fechtbucher in that lineage ever showed. Even better, when you AREN'T 'sparring' your drills look exactly the way they "should". Ya you suck, you can't make your sparring bear more than a passing semblance to your drilling. So you are dishonest and impatient and LAZY. Just fucking drill more. It is not like your life is on the fucking line if you can't use this shit.

And Fiorites? You guys can piss off. Fiore has a lot of kick ass grappling. Everything is basically grappling in his books.

108
Apple Talk / This can't be real food and this is why we are obese!!!
« on: September 05, 2010, 08:28:42 pm »
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IGtDPG4UfI&feature=fvw

Um...ya. Not really sure this lady is firing on all her cylinders.

110
All creative works are copyright under United State laws. Usage of my works in whole or part may be prosecuted.

Bear in mind I am some what embarrassed by this morass of words.   


This here is the beginning of a story I wrote in 2007 while bored in AIT at Ft Lee, learning how to look stuff up in a regulation was just so taxing... It is no where near completion, partly due to me not knowing where I was going with it in the first place. I am sharing this in hope that with some sort of feedback I will be motivated to complete this.

   A lone figure stands. Heavily shrouded, the only indications of life are the white plume of his breath and the slow rise and fall of its shoulders. The wind screams through the narrow canyon, tearing at the figure’s wrappings. Next to him, driven into the ground, is an enormous black sword, taller than he and just as broad. Behind him stretches a narrow and rickety rope bridge over a mist filled chasm.
**********************************************************************
   A quartet of horsemen robed and cowled against the bitter icy cold, ride swiftly through the narrow canyon. Coming around a sharp the lead horse rears up, sliding to a halt on the loose snow and gravel. The other three horsemen skillfully bringing their horses to a stop, laugh loudly as the lead rider curses loudly and reins his horse in.

   “Is Your Highness alright?” bellows the largest of the riders in mirth at the young rider’s antics.

   “Yes, mayhap we should have brought along a pony, an old one, too docile to startle a youngster,” joins in the tallest of the riders.

   Walking his horse back to the rest of the riders, the Prince speaks,”I am quite naturally alright Lord Raerth, merely displaying some horsemanship far beyond your ken.” He pulls back his cowl and gives an impishly young smirk to Lord Raerth. “And as for…”

   Mid-sentence a deep booming voice that seems to come from the very earth, echoing all around them, speaks out,” None shall pass,” accompanied by the horses neighing and a low grinding noise, like the sound of steel being drug along stone.

   The quartet struggle to get their horses under control, while drawing their weapons, the Lord Raerth unsheathed a sizable longsword, followed closely by the tall rider, Master Shiceld, drawing forth a many headed flail.

   “Who dares to deny His Highness, the Prince of Lothland, and his servants?” demands the Prince as he gets his horse under control, again, and unsheathes his with a light steely ring.

   “I do.” The quartet all turn around and see the shrouded figure, who until now had been beyond notice, hefting his massive blade and resting it on his shoulder. “Only strongest in arms may best me and pass through.” The prince pales and nearly drops his at the sight of the massive swords and his equally massive sword. In the brief silence the sharp twanging of a bow fills the air as a handful of arrows thunk deeply into the man’s torso, stopping his advance

   “Well done Sir Bleys!” exclaims the Prince, as the other two men cheer.

Their cheers are cut short by sounds of the arrow shafts being snapped in half. “None. Shall. Pass,” spoke the swordsman as he swings at the Princes head. Lord Raerth barely stopped the mighty blow, his sword chiming loudly with the impact. Suddenly the swordsman whirls his blade around, cutting through the many chains of Master Shiceld’s flail as if they were just twine, sending the spiked weights flying wide. Without missing a beat he cleaves Master Shiceld from shoulder to hip. “Such underhanded tactics shall avail you not.”

Seeing their companion cut down prompts the Prince and Lord Raerth to charge in with a flurry of arrows from Sir Bley’s bow. Moving much faster than seemed possible, the swordsman knocks aside both the Prince’s and Lord Raerth’s blades as he is peppered with the heavy shafts of Sir Bleys’ with no apparent effect.

Sir Bleys, taking what appears to him to be a prime opportunity, drops his bow and draws his sword while spurring his horse to charge the swordsman. Sadly for him, the swordsman moved much quicker and cut down Sir Bleys’ horse, hurling him to the ground. Shaking his head to clear the starbursts from his eyes he barely had enough time to bring his sword up to futilely defend against the swordsman’s attack. With a mighty ringing the swordman’s massive sword shatters Sir Bleys’ sword, cleaving through his head and the stone beneath it.

“None shall pass,” he states, pulling the blade free from the stone and shattered remains of Sir Bleys’ skull, spraying gore and rock chips through the air to spatter on the grounds and no longer virgin white snow.



111
Apple Talk / Torqueblades...WTF
« on: August 06, 2010, 06:53:52 am »
http://www.torqueblade.com/

Man, I missed my calling.

I wish I smart enough to copy 19th century Indian Club regimes, http://ejmas.com/pt/ptart_dick_0101.htm, and then package them with really cool looking 'blades' and then market them as both a fitness program and a meditative practice.

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