Holy Bible UNRATED

[NegativeNinja999]

Ok so here's how this works.  The following ideas are as spreadable as butter(and herpes).  Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to absorb this reinterpretation and use it to fnord a Biblical scholar(using 'scholar' narrowly)............. FIRST THING'S FIRST.................... start your sequence with the word Tabernacle.  Ask your scholar why the Alter of Incense was built with acacia wood.  When he answers explaining that acacia was known as "incorruptible wood" in Biblical times, simply say "Oh, is that because it contains DMT?"  When he responds, "DM-what?" you can then have fun educating him on Dimethyltryptamine(DMT) and its significance to the pineal gland(hoping he won't denounce your scientific mumbo-jumbo).  Tell him how DMT is found in almost every plant & animal, but when extracted becomes a Schedule 1 drug in America.  However, emphasize that there is a church in New Mexico who fought the Supreme Court for the right to drink tea containing DMT in their ceremonies, and won.     #fnord

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I think that you underestimate seminary education and clergy degree requirements.

[NegativeNinja999]

On the contrary sir, I actually tend to OVERestimate such things.  Now back to your homework!

[Nephew Twiddleton]

On the contrary sir, I actually tend to OVERestimate such things.  Now back to your homework!

I was never big on the homework thing. Something about someone telling me to study something that I may or may not be interested in. Anyway, do tell me how this acacia debate goes over with your local minister/priest. I personally have no interest in wasting the time of a man of the cloth by trying to seem smarter than him.

I'd rather make him think that my sinful life is more interesting (and fun) than his.

[NegativeNinja999]

Tweedle Dum, if you have no interest in participating in what I am posting, then do yourself the favor of not wasting your valuable time posting on it less homework for you, genius.

[NegativeNinja999]

Also, nobody cares how interesting your little life is... not even a man of the cloth :/

[East Coast Hustle]

Ok so here's how this works.  The following ideas are as spreadable as butter(and herpes).  Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to absorb this reinterpretation and use it to fnord a Biblical scholar(using 'scholar' narrowly)............. FIRST THING'S FIRST.................... start your sequence with the word Tabernacle.  Ask your scholar why the Alter of Incense was built with acacia wood.  When he answers explaining that acacia was known as "incorruptible wood" in Biblical times, simply say "Oh, is that because it contains DMT?"  When he responds, "DM-what?" you can then have fun educating him on Dimethyltryptamine(DMT) and its significance to the pineal gland(hoping he won't denounce your scientific mumbo-jumbo).  Tell him how DMT is found in almost every plant & animal, but when extracted becomes a Schedule 1 drug in America.  However, emphasize that there is a church in New Mexico who fought the Supreme Court for the right to drink tea containing DMT in their ceremonies, and won.     #fnord

Wow. Stunningly brilliant. I bow before your mighty powers of mindfuckery. Please do let us know how many theologians you manage to convert with your hippie drug rant. After that, let us know how many friends you manage to make here by barging in and being needlessly insulting to other forum members right off the bat. I mean, nobody knows you from Adam so why WOULDN'T that be a good tactic for getting people to listen to what you have to say?

HEY GUYS, THIS NOOB IS KIND OF A DICK SO WE SHOULD TOTALLY LISTEN TO WHAT HE HAS TO SAY!

[Bruno]

Jesus was a mushroom, bro.

[NegativeNinja999]

Well go ahead & pick your pussy-weggie & note that the forum member was a dick first and no these are not hyperbolic "mind-fuckery powers" you twit, these are simple facts that absolutely NO ONE need enjoy unless they genuinely like disproving contemporary religious views... WHICH A DISCORDIAN WOULD NEVER DO lol conserve your anger child.

[Bruno]

Ezekiel 16:49...


WHO'S A SODOMITE NAO?

[Cain]

Well go ahead & pick your pussy-weggie & note that the forum member was a dick first and no these are not hyperbolic "mind-fuckery powers" you twit, these are simple facts that absolutely NO ONE need enjoy unless they genuinely like disproving contemporary religious views... WHICH A DISCORDIAN WOULD NEVER DO lol conserve your anger child.

Are you a Really Real Discordian?

[Cuddlefish]

0/10

Didn't read. Would recommend not reading this to a friend.

Bye now.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Well go ahead & pick your pussy-weggie & note that the forum member was a dick first and no these are not hyperbolic "mind-fuckery powers" you twit, these are simple facts that absolutely NO ONE need enjoy unless they genuinely like disproving contemporary religious views... WHICH A DISCORDIAN WOULD NEVER DO lol conserve your anger child.

This one is SPECIAL.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Tweedle Dum, if you have no interest in participating in what I am posting, then do yourself the favor of not wasting your valuable time posting on it less homework for you, genius.

Yeah, you're gonna go far, kid.

[Freeky]

I WISH more people had seminal degrees. The religious nutjobs might be fewer in number, because I'm pretty sure you have to read the Bible at some point.

Also, as far as Bibles go, I was not aware they weren't all the same for different denominations! So this thread wasn't a complete waste of time.  Are the differences in what books go in, or how it was translated, or