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There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old's life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.

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Crammed it into your greasy maw and liked it? Wipe that shit off your chin and post about it here. NO MARMITE. NO SOUS VIDE.

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