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That line from the father's song in Mary Poppins, where he's going on about how nothing can go wrong, in Britain in 1910.  That's about the point I realized the boy was gonna die in a trench.

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The Barstool Experiment

Started by LHX, June 13, 2006, 05:31:36 PM

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fast speed

#180
May 08, 2007, 11:30:26 AM
Tomorrow then proceeded to pick up itself and pummel triple zero squarely about the head and torso :evil:

tomorrow i will write a list of all things sapient, so as not to piss them off

Lies

#181
May 08, 2007, 11:40:04 AM
The only thing discordians fear are sentient barstools attacking us tomorrow.

Thankfully the goddess protects us by making sure tomorrow never comes.
- So the New World Order does not actually exist?
- Oh it exists, and how!
Ask the slaves whose labour built the White House;
Ask the slaves of today tied down to sweatshops and brothels to escape hunger;
Ask most women, second class citizens, in a pervasive rape culture;
Ask the non-human creatures who inhabit the planet:
whales, bears, frogs, tuna, bees, slaughtered farm animals;
Ask the natives of the Americas and Australia on whose land
you live today, on whose graves your factories, farms and neighbourhoods stand;
ask any of them this, ask them if the New World Order is true;
they'll tell you plainly: the New World Order... is you!

PopeTom

#182
May 08, 2007, 11:47:51 AM
Quote from: Lysergic on May 08, 2007, 11:40:04 AM
The only thing discordians fear are sentient barstools attacking us tomorrow.

Thankfully the goddess protects us by making sure tomorrow never comes.

You are just begging for a schism and Annie to be it's first martyr.
-PopeTom

I am the result of 13.75 ± 0.13 billion years of random chance. Now that I exist I see no reason to start planning and organizing everything in my life.

Random dumb luck got me here, random dumb luck will get me to where I'm going.

Hail Eris!

Lies

#183
May 08, 2007, 11:50:40 AM
Quote from: PopeTom on May 08, 2007, 11:47:51 AM
Quote from: Lysergic on May 08, 2007, 11:40:04 AM
The only thing discordians fear are sentient barstools attacking us tomorrow.

Thankfully the goddess protects us by making sure tomorrow never comes.

You are just begging for a schism and Annie to be it's first martyr.

That made absolutely no sense, even for a discordian.

I don't know who failed in this case, as you might actually be saying complete tripe and in that case, you fail. But then I probably just missed the lulz, and in that case, I fail.

In anycase, I don't want to know the answer.
- So the New World Order does not actually exist?
- Oh it exists, and how!
Ask the slaves whose labour built the White House;
Ask the slaves of today tied down to sweatshops and brothels to escape hunger;
Ask most women, second class citizens, in a pervasive rape culture;
Ask the non-human creatures who inhabit the planet:
whales, bears, frogs, tuna, bees, slaughtered farm animals;
Ask the natives of the Americas and Australia on whose land
you live today, on whose graves your factories, farms and neighbourhoods stand;
ask any of them this, ask them if the New World Order is true;
they'll tell you plainly: the New World Order... is you!

LMNO

#184
May 08, 2007, 12:49:04 PM

Discord

#185
May 08, 2007, 12:56:34 PM
Yeah TOMORROW, I just cant wait.

But you really got me thinking, what if tomorrow really comes? Actually its per definitionem not possible but... time travel? Time travel THROUGH empty Space?  :lulz:

PopeTom

#186
May 08, 2007, 01:04:36 PM
Quote from: Lysergic on May 08, 2007, 11:50:40 AM

That made absolutely no sense, even for a discordian.

I don't know who failed in this case, as you might actually be saying complete tripe and in that case, you fail. But then I probably just missed the lulz, and in that case, I fail.

In anycase, I don't want to know the answer.

You think that's bad, you should see the sad looks of confusion on the faces of my non-Discordian friends when I say something that ends up being uproariously funny only to me.
-PopeTom

I am the result of 13.75 ± 0.13 billion years of random chance. Now that I exist I see no reason to start planning and organizing everything in my life.

Random dumb luck got me here, random dumb luck will get me to where I'm going.

Hail Eris!

Lies

#187
May 08, 2007, 01:23:46 PM
Quote from: LMNO on May 08, 2007, 12:49:04 PM


Yeah, I figured it to be *that* Annie, but... whats she got to do with being a martyr and barstools?
- So the New World Order does not actually exist?
- Oh it exists, and how!
Ask the slaves whose labour built the White House;
Ask the slaves of today tied down to sweatshops and brothels to escape hunger;
Ask most women, second class citizens, in a pervasive rape culture;
Ask the non-human creatures who inhabit the planet:
whales, bears, frogs, tuna, bees, slaughtered farm animals;
Ask the natives of the Americas and Australia on whose land
you live today, on whose graves your factories, farms and neighbourhoods stand;
ask any of them this, ask them if the New World Order is true;
they'll tell you plainly: the New World Order... is you!

PopeTom

#188
May 08, 2007, 01:31:15 PM
Quote from: Lysergic on May 08, 2007, 01:23:46 PM
Yeah, I figured it to be *that* Annie, but... whats she got to do with being a martyr and barstools?

Your comment:

Quote
Thankfully the goddess protects us by making sure tomorrow never comes

Annie's thoughts on tomorrow:
Quote
The sun'll come out
Tomorrow
So ya gotta hang on
'Til tomorrow
Come what may
Tomorrow! Tomorrow!
I love ya Tomorrow!
You're always
A day
A way!

Looks like a place for a schism to me.
And since I'm sure you would be able to take a 10 year old orphan in a fight I'd guess she would be the primary martyr for the side that splits.
-PopeTom

I am the result of 13.75 ± 0.13 billion years of random chance. Now that I exist I see no reason to start planning and organizing everything in my life.

Random dumb luck got me here, random dumb luck will get me to where I'm going.

Hail Eris!

Lies

#189
May 08, 2007, 02:34:03 PM
Ah, right, I see. I haven't actually *seen* annie, but I do know of it, and the song does seem familiar, I'm definitely sure I know the tune that accompanies it.

Ok, I'm back on the track now :D
- So the New World Order does not actually exist?
- Oh it exists, and how!
Ask the slaves whose labour built the White House;
Ask the slaves of today tied down to sweatshops and brothels to escape hunger;
Ask most women, second class citizens, in a pervasive rape culture;
Ask the non-human creatures who inhabit the planet:
whales, bears, frogs, tuna, bees, slaughtered farm animals;
Ask the natives of the Americas and Australia on whose land
you live today, on whose graves your factories, farms and neighbourhoods stand;
ask any of them this, ask them if the New World Order is true;
they'll tell you plainly: the New World Order... is you!

PopeTom

#190
May 08, 2007, 02:35:05 PM
Quote from: Lysergic on May 08, 2007, 02:34:03 PM
Ah, right, I see. I haven't actually *seen* annie, but I do know of it, and the song does seem familiar, I'm definitely sure I know the tune that accompanies it.

Ok, I'm back on the track now :D

Sweet, and here comes the train.

:)
-PopeTom

I am the result of 13.75 ± 0.13 billion years of random chance. Now that I exist I see no reason to start planning and organizing everything in my life.

Random dumb luck got me here, random dumb luck will get me to where I'm going.

Hail Eris!

saint aini

#191
May 21, 2007, 08:21:21 PM
Quote from: PopeTom on May 08, 2007, 11:47:51 AM
Quote from: Lysergic on May 08, 2007, 11:40:04 AM
The only thing discordians fear are sentient barstools attacking us tomorrow.

Thankfully the goddess protects us by making sure tomorrow never comes.

You are just begging for a schism and Annie to be it's first martyr.


You better mean the musical.

I've already played the scapegoat once.
Mary: Let me ask you something.
[Grabs his hand]
Mary: Why are you alive?
John Preston: [Breaks free] I'm alive... I live... to safeguard the continuity of this great society. To serve Libria.
Mary: It's circular. You exist to continue your existence. What's the point?
John Preston: What's the point of your existence?
Mary: To feel. 'Cause you've never done it, you can never know it. But it's as vital as breath. And without it, without love, without anger, without sorrow, breath is just a clock... ticking.

fast speed

#192
May 23, 2007, 10:55:19 AM Last Edit: May 23, 2007, 11:06:36 AM by fast speed
apocalypse-is-nigh!!!! Tommorow MIGHT have happened... can anyone confirm this?

A serious minded barstool was sitting in his pub, having a few pints, and

talking about the nature of Universe.

Suddently he started ranting that most of what we consider ,Äúmatter,Äù is made up

of empty space.  ,ÄúThe distance between a nucleus, its electrons, and the

nearest adjacent atom is comparatively large; why, I shouldn't even be

considered a solid!,Äù

"But wait,Ķ As far as I can actually prove, I might simply be a

hallucination, for I am not actually seeing myself, I'm processing

electric signals in my head generated by my optic nerves.  And all they are

doing is claiming certain wavelengths of light have bounced off an object.  But

what if the nerves are misfiring, which we all know happen quite often?  So, I

can,Äôt really say whether or not I even exist!,Äù He continued.

Just then, a man approached him and said, ,ÄúI couldn,Äôt help but overhear you

talking.  If I may, I have an experiment for you.  Purely in the interest of a

Deeper Understanding of the Universe.,Äù

He then proceeded to pick up the barstool and pummel both Bill and Joe squarely

about the head and torso, because they were so obviously pretentious assholes

who deserved a beatdown.

Thus, they were enlightened.


all



of



them



all

Triple Zero

#193
May 23, 2007, 11:06:48 AM
word salad barstool?
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.

fast speed

#194
May 23, 2007, 11:11:20 AM
yes very.

nutricious

plus

only three(or four... i forget) edits... psh i must be drunk... hmm... i don't feel drunk.
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