The Barstool Experiment

[Triple Zero]

please don't post while you're drunk. especially not in stickied threads.

if you feel you've got something interesting to say while intoxicated, write it up in notepad, re-read when you're sober and if it's still interesting, only then post it.

we care not for the ramblings of drunken n00bs.

did you check the several "n00bs read this" threads on this forum?

[note to people who are thinking "50 posts!", i'm not flaming him, just educating. that's what the 50 posts are for.]

if the barstool-salad was a serious attempt of rewriting the barstool story, i got a remark: i don't like how "Bill and Joe" are suddenly introduced in the story as if they were always there, it was a barstool thinking/talking and now suddenly there's Bill and Joe being pretentious assholes deserving a beatdown? there is nothing in the story to suggest why or how.

[fast speed]

lookey here mam... my points are that not only does things we look at sometimes seem unreal, but also our very own existence. and if i can think like that, i can certantly not have bill and joe becomming pretentious assholes because i would be one myself... i think that the suddenicity of them becomming pretentious assholes in each story are the same. ive got a kinda "nothing can be proven do wtf ever" kinda thing going.

[P3nT4gR4m]

... and you thought you'd share?

Lucky us.

[fast speed]

nonono, lucky me that i am not the only one with someting intestintegrating to say. now just let me be... the greatest way to kill me is to have me boycutted. the way your acting it could look like its some weird noob "come be one of us BUT FIRST HAHAHA" thing... just leave me be, if you dont like it.

like i did, ya? 

[P3nT4gR4m]

Do you only post when in the throes of a temporal lobe seizure or something?

I can't make out a word of it 

[LMNO]

Guys!


50.

Posts.


fast speed may have been drunk when he posted, but that's his right.

I think he was close to something.  Don't bash him. 


Fast, I invite you to speak more on this.  In the meantime, here's bit of fun:

A serious minded barstool was sitting in his pub, having a few pints, and
talking about the nature of Universe.
Suddently he started ranting that most of what we consider “matter” is made up
of empty space.  "The distance between a nucleus, its electrons, and the
nearest adjacent atom is comparatively large; why, I shouldn't even be
considered a solid!"

"But wait, As far as I can actually prove, I might simply be a
hallucination, for I am not actually seeing myself, I'm processing
electric signals in my head generated by my optic nerves.  And all they are
doing is claiming certain wavelengths of light have bounced off an object.  But
what if the nerves are misfiring, which we all know happen quite often?  So, I
can't really say whether or not I even exist!" He continued.

Just then, a man approached him and said, HOLY SHIT!! A TALKING BARSTOOL!

[Triple Zero]

lookey here mam... my points are that not only does things we look at sometimes seem unreal, but also our very own existence.

what do you mean by this?

and if i can think like that, i can certantly not have bill and joe becomming pretentious assholes because i would be one myself...

but you did? what do you mean?

i think that the suddenicity of them becomming pretentious assholes in each story are the same.

how is is the same?

ive got a kinda "nothing can be proven do wtf ever" kinda thing going.

that's nice. a lot of us here can relate to that sort of thing. we appreciate, however, if you can discuss these concepts in understandable language.

nonono, lucky me that i am not the only one with someting intestintegrating to say. now just let me be... the greatest way to kill me is to have me boycutted. the way your acting it could look like its some weird noob "come be one of us BUT FIRST HAHAHA" thing... just leave me be, if you dont like it.

like i did, ya? 

sorry but if i can't understand half a sentence you're saying, i'd rather not have those posts mess up stickied threads.

it's not like we ask you to "come be one of us", it's simply that it's a lot more fun and less work for us to discuss all these concepts when we try to write them down in a clear manner.

Guys!

50.

Posts.

what? how?

my interpretation of the 50 post suggestion is that i won't flame him for being incomprehensible in his first 50 posts.

that does NOT mean i'm not going to ask him to clarify himself, nor does it mean i will not point out the incomprehensibility of his posts.

because otherwise, how is he going to learn you don't need to babble incoherently in order to say something interesting on a discordian board?

fast speed may have been drunk when he posted, but that's his right.

I think he was close to something.  Don't bash him. 

not bashing him.

just asking for clarification.

preferably clarification when he's sober.

Fast, I invite you to speak more on this. 

me too, but please do it in comprehensible sentences.

[fast speed]

tch

i see. 

i will try to write in a language that we can all easily understand, although it will probably not be as rewarding when you finally understand it. 

i will clarify my points later.

i wasnt drunk, at any time. dunno how that came to be such a big thing.

ooh how i will clarify... 

[LMNO]

I look forward to it.

My questions:

1. Why give sentience to the barstool?

2. In doing so, how do you feel about taking a parable against flights of fancy, and making it fancful?

3.  How would two assholes be enlightened after being hit by a sentient barstool?

[HBOMB]

The barstool as a metaphor for the foundation that we sit upon making our pretentious statements as if we ever completely understood the entire scope of existence?

Basically....st00pid humans?

I'm still new at this but well aware that I'm fair game for a smack down.

[LMNO]

I think almost everything boils down to "stupid humans".

[P3nT4gR4m]

LMNO waving a huge big troofbrush ITT

[Fuzzymike]

I think almost everything boils down to "stupid humans".

I've been thinking and saying this for years. In fact it has become my mantra. And yes everything (and I mean everything!) boils down to "stupid humans". Simply because without humans and the way they percieve reality, and force their perceptions on others, nothing would seem like it does.

[AFK]

First of all, welcome to the boards.

Second, could you expand upon that.  In particular, I'm interested in an expansion on the idea of "nothing would seem like it does."
How do things seem in your estimation?

[Darth Cupcake]

I am curious how "nothing would seem like it does" without us perceiving the seeming.

Did that make sense?

Even within the realm of "stupid humans," perception is wildly varying. The roomies and I were having one of those drunk philosophy talks the other night about people we know who exist in COMPLETELY different realities, who just perceive the world completely differently from the "norm," if you will. But every one of these so-called realities are subjective. Perhaps my roomie's ex-girlfriend was closer to "actual" reality, if you will, than he and I are. But who are we to say?

There are concrete things (such as barstools, for example), but how people respond to them, etc, happens on a huge scale of variation. So how can we even say things would "seem" different if we weren't here to say how it seems?

Or am I just ending up saying "if a tree falls and no one is there to hear it, does it make a noise?" I don't know. I had a point when I started.