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The Barstool Experiment

Started by LHX, June 13, 2006, 05:31:36 PM

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the last yatto

#450
this picture belongs here, from a comic book called Transmetropolitan


Look, asshole:  Your 'incomprehensible' act, your word-salad, your pinealism...It BORES ME.  I've been incomprehensible for so long, I TEACH IT TO MBA CANDIDATES.  So if you simply MUST talk about your pineal gland or happy children dancing in the wildflowers, go talk to Roger, because he digs that kind of shit

Jasper


the last yatto

Look, asshole:  Your 'incomprehensible' act, your word-salad, your pinealism...It BORES ME.  I've been incomprehensible for so long, I TEACH IT TO MBA CANDIDATES.  So if you simply MUST talk about your pineal gland or happy children dancing in the wildflowers, go talk to Roger, because he digs that kind of shit

Reginald Ret

hmmm have to go check the local comicbook store now... to buy some for real(already downloading) because this kind of shit deserves my money.
Lord Byron: "Those who will not reason, are bigots, those who cannot, are fools, and those who dare not, are slaves."

Nigel saying the wisest words ever uttered: "It's just a suffix."

"The worst forum ever" "The most mediocre forum on the internet" "The dumbest forum on the internet" "The most retarded forum on the internet" "The lamest forum on the internet" "The coolest forum on the internet"

Xirian

"Self Test for Paranoia: You know you have it when you
can't think of anything that's your own fault"

"Paranoia will get you through times of no enemies
better than enemies will get you through times of
no paranoia"
Henry Rollins

~Xirian~

ElbowMacaroni

#455
A duck, a preist, and a proctologist walk into a bar...

they sit down, have a few drinks and the duck starts arguing with the priest about the the physical existence of stool. The duck contemplates that his stool perhaps wasn't actually solid due to the majority of space between sub-atomic particles, etc... The priest insists that although the stool was put there by god himself and as a result must be solid, admits that he is also a learned man and realizes that perhaps the stool may not indeed be solid. However, he refused flatly to take a firm stand on the topic. Eventually the proctologist tires of this banter and walks over to the duck, shoves his hand up the ducks ass rips out a big old blob of green and white and proceeds to slap both the duck and the priest, and says to them, this shit'd be solid if yah ate more protien!

And so they were enlightened...

Lies

NA zen story
Nothing Exists

Yamaoka Tesshu, as a young student of Zen, visited one master after another. He called upon Dokuon of Shokoku.

Desiring to show his attainment, he said: "The mind, Buddha, and sentient beings, after all, do not exist. The true nature of phenomena is emptiness. There is no realization, no delusion, no sage, no mediocrity. There is no giving and nothing to be received."

Dokuon, who was smoking quietly, said nothing. Suddenly he whacked Yamaoka with his bamboo pipe. This made the youth quite angry.

"If nothing exists," inquired Dokuon, "where did this anger come from?"
- So the New World Order does not actually exist?
- Oh it exists, and how!
Ask the slaves whose labour built the White House;
Ask the slaves of today tied down to sweatshops and brothels to escape hunger;
Ask most women, second class citizens, in a pervasive rape culture;
Ask the non-human creatures who inhabit the planet:
whales, bears, frogs, tuna, bees, slaughtered farm animals;
Ask the natives of the Americas and Australia on whose land
you live today, on whose graves your factories, farms and neighbourhoods stand;
ask any of them this, ask them if the New World Order is true;
they'll tell you plainly: the New World Order... is you!

Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

Quote from: Lysergic on January 11, 2009, 11:19:15 AM
NA zen story
Nothing Exists

Yamaoka Tesshu, as a young student of Zen, visited one master after another. He called upon Dokuon of Shokoku.

Desiring to show his attainment, he said: "The mind, Buddha, and sentient beings, after all, do not exist. The true nature of phenomena is emptiness. There is no realization, no delusion, no sage, no mediocrity. There is no giving and nothing to be received."

Dokuon, who was smoking quietly, said nothing. Suddenly he whacked Yamaoka with his bamboo pipe. This made the youth quite angry.

"If nothing exists," inquired Dokuon, "where did this anger come from?"

:mittens:

Beautiful and poignant!
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

Cain

Quote from: Lysergic on January 11, 2009, 11:19:15 AM
NA zen story
Nothing Exists

Yamaoka Tesshu, as a young student of Zen, visited one master after another. He called upon Dokuon of Shokoku.

Desiring to show his attainment, he said: "The mind, Buddha, and sentient beings, after all, do not exist. The true nature of phenomena is emptiness. There is no realization, no delusion, no sage, no mediocrity. There is no giving and nothing to be received."

Dokuon, who was smoking quietly, said nothing. Suddenly he whacked Yamaoka with his bamboo pipe. This made the youth quite angry.

"If nothing exists," inquired Dokuon, "where did this anger come from?"

:lulz:

Ziggy Odyssey

a priest walked into a bar... and split his head open... on it.

:kingmeh:


ElbowMacaroni

Quote from: Ziggy Odyssey on January 14, 2009, 09:21:27 PM
a priest walked into a bar... and split his head open... on it.

:kingmeh:



Yeah, that sounds about right

LMNO

::hits the "restart" button::

Quote from: LMNO on June 13, 2006, 05:38:30 PM
Clumsily put, Let's say we were in a bar, having a few pints, and talking about the nature of Universe.

You point out that most of what we consider "matter" is made up of empty space; the distance between a nucleus, it's electrons, and the nearest adjacent atom is comparatively large; why, that barstool over there shouldn't even be considered a solid!

I respond by saying that as far as we can actually prove, that barstool might simply be a hallucination, for we're not actually seeing the barstool, we're processing electric signals in our heads generated by our optic nevrves that claim certain wavelengths of ligh have bounced off an object, but none of that says anything about whether or not the barstool actually exists.


Then ECH comes along, picks up the barstool, and proceeds to beat the shit out of us with it for being such pretentious assholes.



Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

Quote from: LMNO on January 16, 2009, 12:49:16 PM
::hits the "restart" button::

Quote from: LMNO on June 13, 2006, 05:38:30 PM
Clumsily put, Let's say we were in a bar, having a few pints, and talking about the nature of Universe.

You point out that most of what we consider "matter" is made up of empty space; the distance between a nucleus, it's electrons, and the nearest adjacent atom is comparatively large; why, that barstool over there shouldn't even be considered a solid!

I respond by saying that as far as we can actually prove, that barstool might simply be a hallucination, for we're not actually seeing the barstool, we're processing electric signals in our heads generated by our optic nevrves that claim certain wavelengths of ligh have bounced off an object, but none of that says anything about whether or not the barstool actually exists.


Then ECH comes along, picks up the barstool, and proceeds to beat the shit out of us with it for being such pretentious assholes.




Then, of course, ECH goes to jail for putting LMNO in the hospital and you in a coma for the rest of your life....
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

Golden Applesauce

Quote from: Ratatosk on January 16, 2009, 05:33:02 PM
Quote from: LMNO on January 16, 2009, 12:49:16 PM
::hits the "restart" button::

Quote from: LMNO on June 13, 2006, 05:38:30 PM
Clumsily put, Let's say we were in a bar, having a few pints, and talking about the nature of Universe.

You point out that most of what we consider "matter" is made up of empty space; the distance between a nucleus, it's electrons, and the nearest adjacent atom is comparatively large; why, that barstool over there shouldn't even be considered a solid!

I respond by saying that as far as we can actually prove, that barstool might simply be a hallucination, for we're not actually seeing the barstool, we're processing electric signals in our heads generated by our optic nevrves that claim certain wavelengths of ligh have bounced off an object, but none of that says anything about whether or not the barstool actually exists.


Then ECH comes along, picks up the barstool, and proceeds to beat the shit out of us with it for being such pretentious assholes.




Then, of course, ECH goes to jail for putting LMNO in the hospital and you in a coma for the rest of your life....

LMNO and Ratatosk get into a heated argument over whether it is possible to escape from said jail, or if one will always (in some sense) remain in jail.
Q: How regularly do you hire 8th graders?
A: We have hired a number of FORMER 8th graders.

ElbowMacaroni

chugga chugga choo choo ding ding choo choo