Ask Bella

[Malaul]

Dear Bella,

Which shall I use?

The gloss and polish soft hold hairspray?

or the 'fruity pebbles' maximum hold hairspray?





Also........................................do I have any visible panty lines?

Both. One on top of the other.

PS: Only when you wear panties.

HAHAHAAA

[Trollax]

Dear Bella,
How do I go all Super Menendez Bros. without landing in jail?

[Bella]

Dear Bella,
How do I go all Super Menendez Bros. without landing in jail?

You don't.

[Guido Finucci]

I broke my body at the gym yesterday.
-me-

Dear Bella,

Can't you just sew your body back together or whatever it is that Zombies do?

[Bella]

I broke my body at the gym yesterday.
-me-

Dear Bella,

Can't you just sew your body back together or whatever it is that Zombies do?

What a good idea :P
I tried gluing myself back together with margaritas last night and guess what?
It didn't work

[Guido Finucci]

I tried gluing myself back together with margaritas last night and guess what?
It didn't work

Ahhh - you didn't make the maragritas chunky enough then.  

[Bella]

I tried gluing myself back together with margaritas last night and guess what?
It didn't work

Ahhh - you didn't make the maragritas chunky enough then.  

Ohh......is that the secret?

[Guido Finucci]

Ohh......is that the secret?

Yup. usually smooth is good but if you want to hold yourself together you need to keep the ice lumpy.

In extreme cases you may wish to consider leaving out all the other ingredients altogether and just drinking the tequila.

[Bella]

Ohh......is that the secret?

Yup. usually smooth is good but if you want to hold yourself together you need to keep the ice lumpy.

In extreme cases you may wish to consider leaving out all the other ingredients altogether and just drinking the tequila.

Hmmm....just so happens that I have an almost full bottle of tequila in the refrigerator right now, Guido.  

[Guido Finucci]

Hmmm....just so happens that I have an almost full bottle of tequila in the refrigerator right now, Guido.  

Isn't having a full bottle of tequila considered to be a crime in the good state of California? So wouldn't you almost be committing a crime, right now?

You really should remedy that.

[Malaria test subject #777]

Hmmm....just so happens that I have an almost full bottle of tequila in the refrigerator right now, Guido.  

Isn't having a full bottle of tequila considered to be a crime in the good state of California? So wouldn't you almost be committing a crime, right now?

You really should remedy that.

A crime? Hmm.....I do believe you're right.
Yes, come ot think of it, I'm almost certain you're correct, Guido.
And I also have a full bottle of tequila.

Hold on.....be right back.

K, now I'm a law abiding citizen once more.
What a relief!

Wait......I'm not in California, I'm in New York. Is it a crime here too?
It must be. Oh well, bottoms up!

[Bella]

Well, I certainly don't want to the be the only outlaw
among such a pair of upstanding citizens, now do I?

Time for me to obey the law, too.
Only, I just happen to have some margarita mix
in the fridge to go with the tequila.

You two are such a comfort to me.

[Guido Finucci]

Well, I certainly don't want to the be the only outlaw among such a pair of upstanding citizens, now do I?

Indeed not. The system loves you and wants to be your friend. Obey the crab. Obey. OBEY!
































OBEY!

[Bella]

Oh well, if I must, then I must.
But what a sacrifice to make....
and on Chaoflux of all nights, too.  

PS: The system loves me???
Are you sure?
Scary thought

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

Having a full bottle of tequila anywhere is just wrong, man.