ITT: Best Posts of the Day

[Cramulus]

*tadahhhhhhhhhhhahhhhhhhhhh*

*bounces in* here i am darlings! yeahhhhhhhhh!

*flexes muscles and wraps legs and arms around Tao and hangs off his wonderful body and kisses him*

*stops kissing for a moment to announce* hey if you do not like bonking while st. till sings to you its yer own problem. I just love rammstein and sex. wonderful combination and the lyrics inspire you for nice kinky games. yeah... isnt that so Tao? *kisssssses again really deeply*

its sooooooooo cute you waiting for me to arrive in this thread and Tao especially describing my body so wonderfuly! *kissssssssssss*


hey bella, where is your personal cabbage killer bodyguard? every assassin needs one actually *grinnnn* the atrocities we leave behind - cabbages and such do not like that and turn vicious at times. thats why i decided to have Tao with me for protection and other things.... like *kissses her cabbage killer boyfriend bodyguard again*

Hey horab and guido, you need canibal corpse to get bonkin´ ´ard or what? *giggle*

we should submit this shit to fanfic sites

[Triple Zero]

Like, fanfic written in the first person?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

It could be the start of a trend! A terrible, terrible trend.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

That was painful to read and almost made me puke in mah pance.

negative 20 stars! would not read again!!

[Cainad (dec.)]

*tadahhhhhhhhhhhahhhhhhhhhh*

*bounces in* here i am darlings! yeahhhhhhhhh!

*flexes muscles and wraps legs and arms around Tao and hangs off his wonderful body and kisses him*

*stops kissing for a moment to announce* hey if you do not like bonking while st. till sings to you its yer own problem. I just love rammstein and sex. wonderful combination and the lyrics inspire you for nice kinky games. yeah... isnt that so Tao? *kisssssses again really deeply*

its sooooooooo cute you waiting for me to arrive in this thread and Tao especially describing my body so wonderfuly! *kissssssssssss*


hey bella, where is your personal cabbage killer bodyguard? every assassin needs one actually *grinnnn* the atrocities we leave behind - cabbages and such do not like that and turn vicious at times. thats why i decided to have Tao with me for protection and other things.... like *kissses her cabbage killer boyfriend bodyguard again*

Hey horab and guido, you need canibal corpse to get bonkin´ ´ard or what? *giggle*

we should submit this shit to fanfic sites

Dear God. You guys really aren't kidding when you talk about the Bad Old Days of this forum.

[Chairman Risus]

The only pill I CAN forget to take is my Nexium (though I remember the next day when I start shooting horrible streams of acid out of my mouth).

My problem with the other pills is that sometimes I take 'em, then I forget I took 'em, and I take 'em again.  Then I go to work the next morning convinced that I am Tancred of Hauteville, and I burn the break room down looking for plunder.

What I am NOT going to do is buy pill bottles that tell me what to do and when to do it.  This is why I don't own a GPS in my car.  Machines don't tell me what to do.  They shouldn't tell ANYONE what to do, or even that THE WHITE ZONE IS FOR LOADING AND UNLOADING ONLY.  But people DO allow machines to tell them what to do, even as they drive their talking GPS-guided car to their Empowerment Group Session.  This pisses me off, and makes me feel like installing machine guns on my car.  Three of them.  And a mine layer, like in those James Bond films.  But no, there are "laws" that prevent me from doing this, so I am restricted to flipping off the autocop cameras on my way through.

If any of you loved me, you'd all kill yourselves.

I'll be running on this all week.

[Doktor Howl]

The only pill I CAN forget to take is my Nexium (though I remember the next day when I start shooting horrible streams of acid out of my mouth).

My problem with the other pills is that sometimes I take 'em, then I forget I took 'em, and I take 'em again.  Then I go to work the next morning convinced that I am Tancred of Hauteville, and I burn the break room down looking for plunder.

What I am NOT going to do is buy pill bottles that tell me what to do and when to do it.  This is why I don't own a GPS in my car.  Machines don't tell me what to do.  They shouldn't tell ANYONE what to do, or even that THE WHITE ZONE IS FOR LOADING AND UNLOADING ONLY.  But people DO allow machines to tell them what to do, even as they drive their talking GPS-guided car to their Empowerment Group Session.  This pisses me off, and makes me feel like installing machine guns on my car.  Three of them.  And a mine layer, like in those James Bond films.  But no, there are "laws" that prevent me from doing this, so I am restricted to flipping off the autocop cameras on my way through.

If any of you loved me, you'd all kill yourselves.

I'll be running on this all week.

I hate machines that presume to give me orders more than I hate people.

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

[Suu]

How does one go about with loosening up a friend?

Butt plugs.

[Eater of Clowns]

Dunno about harder to service, my point of view about simplicity in fixed gear versus multi gear is that it simply has less cogs cables and other parts that can break. Less parts is less breakage in a hostile environment, such as my city.

My bike is broken, yet I can still ride it around as a two speed.

If more of it breaks, I can still ride it as a one speed.

This is all irrelevant though to the greatest bicycles on earth, which hark from the Netherlands and I'm aghast you have neglected to mention. None of this rear-attaching, shit-falling-off-and-you-don't-know-it-because-it's behind-you, Xtra-cycle, 90's-neo-hippie American crap.

The Dutch know how to MOVE SHIT ON A BIKE:



LOOK AT THAT SHIT! YOU COULD PUT A PERSON IN THAT BUCKET THAT IS TOO FAT TO RIDE A GODDAMN BIKE!

THE FRONT WHEEL IS TINY AS FUCK SO YOU CAN SEE OVER IT.

SEE THAT LONG THUNDERDICK OF A BAR THAT GOES TO THE FRONT WHEEL: THAT'S A MOTHERFUCKING STEERING APPARATUS THAT WOULD RAPE A GIRAFFE WITH YOUR MOM MERELY BY LOOKING AT IT.

THE MOTHERFUCKING DRIVETRAIN IS COVERED WITH PLASTIC SHIT SO YOUR FUCKING PANTIES WONT GET ZALGOED TO A FINE, BLACK PULP OF SUPERNATURAL EXCREMENT.

AND FEAST YOUR EYES ON THE DOUBLE-FUCKING-SIDED KICKSTAND. YOU CAN GO FROM FULLY ERECT, TO THRUSTING YOUR WAY THROUGH TRAFFIC IN A SINGLE GODDAMN GESTURE.

WHEN YOUR NUTS SWELL OUT OF YOUR PANTS FROM RIDING THIS BITCH YOU CAN JUST PARK THAT SHIT ON THE BACK MOTHERFUCKING CARRIER AND FEEL THE COOL BREEZE RIPPLE THROUGH YOUR SCROTE. UNLESS YOUR SWOLLEN-ASS NUTS WEIGH MORE THAN 35 KILOS. THAT'S 77 POUNDS OF BUILT-IN BRA FOR YOUR NUTS IN THE BACKSEAT ALONE.

[NotPublished]

Until you can accept your primate nature you will never be accepted here.

I am accepting my primate nature. I'm embracing it. By way of not letting this drop. This is insane. You're perfectly welcome to act like a barbarian, but to use it to obstruct another person is a really sketchy way to go about life.

Sigh. 

We've gone through this with every new person who is too self-absorbed or too blind to understand that we are a tight-knit community, some of us having been here for six years.  Everyone who has been accepted here has been so because they in some way assimilate to the "Hive-Mind".  Anyone who can't make their peace with the people already here--one way or another--will not be able to post in any productive way, and usually leaves through sheer force of social antagonism. 

The heart of civilization is the ability and willingness to follow the unspoken rules of a community.  You are not one of us, you said something offensive, and you refuse to back down despite our collective denunciations.  And we're barbarians?

Lol Barbarian

[Telarus]

 

[BADGE OF HONOR]

And that was on like page five...

[Freeky]

Our Pixie, who art in Scotland
Hallowed by thy Name
Thy stormclouds come
Thy WRATH be done, in Tucson as it is in Portland.

Give us this day our daily rain
And forgive us our spaggotry, as we forgive those who dost spag against us
Lead us not into temptation
We can find it ourselves
For thine is the weather system, the Thunder and the Payne, for ever and ever I guess.

[Remington]

Woot! First time in this thread, IIRC.