Chaos Magik

[Adios]

This clown is a troll.

[Dimocritus]

This clown is a troll.

[the last yatto]

okay, let me put this in a way that maybe makes it more clear to you:

This ritual can be used as an unearthing sequence to close off a 'heavy' period of whatever. It's aim is to promote laughter by having fun and inviting a bunch of people over to party and rock out.

Discordians have long identified pie, cake, music and socializing with a bunch of friends as a contemporary avatar of Whothefuckreallycarus, the God of Awesome. Pie, Cake, Music and Friends are awesome.

- Preparation
Priest to pick out three of his favourite DVDs that he has fond memories of having a superb time watching with others.

Priest to take his phone, email and instant messaging client and send out the following statements of intent over the communicational astral quantum fairy tubes (being, a contactlist of his closest friends):

HI DUDE WANNA COME OVER AND WATCH MOVIE X Y AND Z ON <date ####>? ITLL BE AWESOEM AND THERE WILL BE PIE AND CAKE, ALSO GREAT PARTY AFTERWARDS

Priest then to make a list of cool people that he thinks are awesome, or would do well in generally jazzing up the place and/or for decorational purposes. He will then call those people up on their mobile and intone the following incantation:

HEY YEAH I WAS WONDERING I AM THROWING THIS PARTY BECAUSE OF <reason selected from this list> ON <date ####> THERE WILL BE PIE AND CAKE AND BEER, ITS GOING TO BE AWESOEM AND ALSO BRING SOMETHING TO DRINK AND/OR EAT

(make sure it's the same date as the other statement of intent, or you might haunt your house with summoned unwanted entities at a later date)

Now for everybody that didnt pick up the phone (but you still intoned the incantation into the temporal shifting mechanism known as "voicemail"), you will use TELEPATHY. you can use TELEPATHY (which works by astral quantum spirit molecules) by opening your email program and writing the above statements of intent to the proper people, and, this is really important, you WRITE YOUR NAME, DATE AND ADDRESS BELOW IT. this will anchor the Awesome from the astral onto the material plane.

Finally, close your eyes and try to contact your Common Sense Egregore (he sort of looks like a glowing lightbulb), and a way to repeat the above process with a separate telepathic mechanism known as "Instant Messaging" might come to you, if you have received the proper initiation for this grade (see "registering for an AIM account" in the telepathy help guide on http://www.aim.com, a very useful website on quantum communicating). AIM stands for Aetheric Iniate Magicqk.

Your Common Sense Egregore might also provide you with additional means of telepathy, such as "Text-messaging" or "Handing Out Flyers".

- On the <date #####>, before manifestation happens, you will make sure you have rented the DVDs, have a DVD player ready, there must be cookie, pie and beer. also a salad buffet (altar) and quiche. you may also adorn yourself with a party hat but please don't overdo it. wear bright coloured clothes.

Make sure to arrange the holy temple furniture (that's chairs and couches and pillows) in such a way as to make circular formations of more than 4 our 5 people impossible.

Turn on your favourite insane happy music (i have some suggestions if you wish) and do a little dance.

- If you done everything properly, your best friends should begin to manifest early in the afternoon. Watch the DVDs with them. Repeat until laughter is acquired. Then continue.

- After (or while) the DVDs have been watched, eat something, drink something.

- The rest of the guests might begin to manifest. Be nice to them.

- Honk, Honk, Honk, Honk, Honk (ad infinitum) (this was already there, but i left it in)

- Nobody cares about what kind of music you play, as long as it's laid back and sort of backgroundish. No techno. No death metal. No cybergoth industrial. No Joy Division. Also, unfortunately, no insanely happy bouncy music because this will undoubtedly tire out your guests. I suggest "fatboy slim - on the floor at the boutique", Kruder & Dorfmeister and Shpongle.

- Upon hearing the sound of the horn, all celebrants must 'freeze' into statues of pomposity and self-importance. This is why you must make sure there are no horns around.

- You will now proceed to exchange pleasantries, drink, partake of a hotdog, chat, have fun and think up plans for world domination (aka: drink beer).

- The rite may end here, or alternatively, you may continue to party on indefinitely as per the suggestion in the HHGTTG.

- If a Banishing is required, you can turn off the music and kindly tell your guests that you are really tired and maybe they can go to a bar or something and continue there because you really need the sleep.

- The next morning, clean up.

[Stelpa]

The first thing I saw on that site:

"An Old Point That Bears Repeating"

Fuckin' bears >_>