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Sabotage manual from 1944 describes today's workplace

Started by greyseraph, June 11, 2008, 07:18:39 PM

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greyseraph

Sorry I'm new here and I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this but I figured it would be interesting nonetheless!

Apparently this "Simple Sabotage Field Manual" was recently declassified. Found it on this blog and haven't read the whole thing yet but its very interesting.

http://www.hyperorg.com/blogger/2008/06/11/simple-sabotage/

Maybe we can find a few tips in it, but hilariously enough it seems like some are already being put into place, as most people who work in an office (thankfully not me) might recognize these in their workplace already.

Quote from: Page 28...

(1) Insist on doing everything through "channels." Never permit short-cuts to be taken in order to expedite decisions.
(2) Make "speeches." Talk as frequently as possible and at great length. Illustrate your "points" by long anecdotes and accounts of per­sonal experiences. Never hesitate to make a few appropriate "patriotic" comments.
(3) When possible, refer all matters to committees, for "further study and considera­tion." Attempt to make the committees as large as possible — never less than five.
(4) Bring up irrelevant issues as frequently as possible.
(5) Haggle over precise wordings of com­munications, minutes, resolutions.
(6) Refer back to matters decided upon at the last meeting and attempt to re-open the question of the advisability of that decision.
(7) Advocate "caution." Be "reasonable" and urge your fellow-conferees to be "reason­able" and avoid haste which might result in embarrassments or difficulties later on.
(8) Be worried about the propriety of any decision — raise the question of whether such action as is contemplated lies within the juris­ diction of the group or whether it might conflict with the policy of some higher echelon.

...

Cain


Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

BADGE OF HONOR

The Jerk On Bike rolled his eyes and tossed the waffle back over his shoulder--before it struck the ground, a stout, disconcertingly monkey-like dog sprang into the air and snatched it, and began to masticate it--literally--for the sound it made was like a homonculus squatting on the floor muttering "masticate masticate masticate".

LMNO


greyseraph

Quote from: Rabid Badger of God on June 11, 2008, 07:36:40 PM
Hello and welcome.

Thank you. I joined because of the beautiful women and wild orgies everyone has been talking about. By the way, when is the next one scheduled?

LMNO


AFK

Quote from: greyseraph on June 11, 2008, 07:48:45 PM
Quote from: Rabid Badger of God on June 11, 2008, 07:36:40 PM
Hello and welcome.

Thank you. I joined because of the beautiful women and wild orgies everyone has been talking about. By the way, when is the next one scheduled?

the what?  Must be in one of those secret forums. 
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

Quote from: R.W.H.N. on June 11, 2008, 08:02:39 PM
Quote from: greyseraph on June 11, 2008, 07:48:45 PM
Quote from: Rabid Badger of God on June 11, 2008, 07:36:40 PM
Hello and welcome.

Thank you. I joined because of the beautiful women and wild orgies everyone has been talking about. By the way, when is the next one scheduled?

the what?  Must be in one of those secret forums. 

Nah, you're just inordinately drunk when they happen... so you don't remember the next day.

You should be glad we didn't have magic markers at the last one!!!
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

greyseraph

I work at [LARGE SHIPPING COMPANY DELETED] and as I've been discovering more and more its quite difficult to make anything more ineffective or chaotic or disorganized than it already is. I shall do my best however! I really have no clue how that 30lb package of bouncy balls opened up and spilled everywhere...

BADGE OF HONOR

Quote from: greyseraph on June 11, 2008, 08:37:41 PM
I work at [LARGE SHIPPING COMPANY DELETED] and as I've been discovering more and more its quite difficult to make anything more ineffective or chaotic or disorganized than it already is. I shall do my best however! I really have no clue how that 30lb package of bouncy balls opened up and spilled everywhere...

I have friends who work/ed at UPS, and yeah, by the sounds of it there's no real need to deliberately screw around with things.  Although they did like to pack the trucks with something especially heavy on top, just to be mean.
The Jerk On Bike rolled his eyes and tossed the waffle back over his shoulder--before it struck the ground, a stout, disconcertingly monkey-like dog sprang into the air and snatched it, and began to masticate it--literally--for the sound it made was like a homonculus squatting on the floor muttering "masticate masticate masticate".

Verbal Mike

Hehe, yeah, ever since I got this Real Job where I'm at now I can't help but notice how NOTHING is more infused with Verwirrung than a well-ordered coporation. I work in customer service and I find myself thinking "WTF?" all the time. I can hardly imagine what our poor poor customers think.
Unless stated otherwise, feel free to copy or reproduce any text I post anywhere and any way you like. I will never throw a hissy-fit over it, promise.

Daruko

                          :mittens:
Wow.. 1944.  Excellent amazing material! 

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Wow, that manual is delightful! What a find!

I must say, my UPS people are mostly fucking excellent. There was one guy who kept returning my personal purchases as "undeliverable" because I sold one of my businesses so stuff coming to that business was now going to a different address (never quite got his logic on that one), but I think he was fired.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Dysfunctional Cunt

 :lulz:

That is some seriously funny stuff!

Nice post!  And Welcome!!!