ATTN: everyone who eats in restaurants

[East Coast Hustle]

Get the fucking sauce.

or don't get the fucking sauce.

I don't care.

but I will pull your eyeball out with a pair of tongs, batter it, deep fry it, and serve it with horseradish sauce the next time you order your fucking sauce on the fucking side.

enjoy your meal.

[Triple Zero]

right on.

my idea is usually that the chef knows how the food is served best. how am i even supposed to know? i just see a vague description on the menu. so he can put the sauce whereever he wants.

i prefer it sort of drizzled over the meat, with a fine line of splashes around the clean white plate, or whatever it is they do to make it look so fancy. on top of it should be a deep fried chip or curl of some obscure vegetable (so you can ask the waiter, "what is this?", "deep fried black salsify root chips", "oh, cool! ") and one or two chives.

try doing that "on the side"

[Adios]

In a lot of dishes 'on the side' completely alters the flavor as it doesn't allow the flavors to meld correctly.

I agree with the OP.

[Darth Cupcake]

Ah'm a payin' customerrr
Yuh'll put the sawce where Ah wants the sawce
Yew unnerstand?
    \

     /
All this "flavor" and "cookin" stuff makes a man right nervous
Ah need a li'l space from that sneaky sawce
It might try'n hurt me

[Richter]

Order "Big Mac" with the sauce on the side.

(Eat it at your own peril.)

[LMNO]

Get the fucking sauce.

or don't get the fucking sauce.

I don't care.

but I will pull your eyeball out with a pair of tongs, batter it, deep fry it, and serve it with horseradish sauce the next time you order your fucking sauce on the fucking side.

enjoy your meal.

Can I get the horseradish on the side?

[Adios]

Order "Big Mac" with the sauce on the side.

(Eat it at your own peril.)

O:MF. Have 6 people in the car at the peak of their rush and every one of you order it 'special'.

[LMNO]

Explain again how this is a mindfuck?

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

I usually let them just make it however they make it as the chef is the professional. 

The only thing I ask for on the side is my salad dressing so my salad isn't one lump of wilted veggies.  UGH!

[Adios]

Explain again how this is a mindfuck?

Correction. Jake.

Nazi! 

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Get the fucking sauce.

or don't get the fucking sauce.

I don't care.

but I will pull your eyeball out with a pair of tongs, batter it, deep fry it, and serve it with horseradish sauce the next time you order your fucking sauce on the fucking side.

enjoy your meal.

Fuck you.

[Richter]

Explain again how this is a mindfuck?

Correction. Jake.

Nazi! 

I'd just label it "Being an ass at an eatery for kicks".
Honestly better fun with a SLIGHTLY snooty joint. 

[hooplala]

Get the fucking sauce.

or don't get the fucking sauce.

I don't care.

but I will pull your eyeball out with a pair of tongs, batter it, deep fry it, and serve it with horseradish sauce the next time you order your fucking sauce on the fucking side.

enjoy your meal.

Fuck you.

[hooplala]

Explain again how this is a mindfuck?

Correction. Jake.

Nazi! 

I'd just label it "Being an ass at an eatery for kicks".
Honestly better fun with a SLIGHTLY snooty joint. 

Why don't you kids go back to the clubhouse?
                                           \

[Jenne]

I JUST WATCHED THAT TODAY!  Ferris, one of the bestest cinematic jakers of the 80's!