Vs. Organized Religion

[Vene]

For a while I was nominally Christian.  I believed in God and Jesus, but didn't really care or know much about Christianity.  One day I got it into my head to open up a Bible and start reading (I've always been a bookworm, still am).  I could not get through all of Genesis before I was thoroughly disgusted.  I didn't care whether or not it was true, I refused to worship that monster.  I have since looked for more evidence for Bible-god (I found nothing), read apologetics (riddled with fallacies), and read secular sites (hey, these guys care about evidence).  I've also looked a bit into some other religions, but it's all just magic and fairytales.  Christianity was only somewhat real to me because I was told from a young age that it was correct.  As for Discordianism, it's just a big joke to me.  And a joke that makes more sense than any religion.

Besides, who else but a crazy woman would make such a fucked up universe?

[Voodoo]

Are the rumors about the horrifying things Mormons do to jello true?

Elohim approves this message.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Are the rumors about the horrifying things Mormons do to jello true?

One word:

celery.

[Kurt Christ]

My family was never very devout, though I went to a Baptist church when I was a kid, and a Methodist church after we moved. I liked the youth group and the youth minister at the Methodist church, and it wasn't any experience with them that turned me off towards Christianity. I just didn't like the whole "Be Christian or go to Hell" part of the religion, and became deist after a while. After that, I found the Goddess during a time when I was becoming more interested in philosophy in general, and she followed me home, and I made the mistake of feeding her, so she never left.

[Calendula!]

I think the jello thing might actually have more to do with Mormon culture being so very middle-American at heart, because we've got some very scary jello-based recipes in our family cookbook that long predate my mom's family's conversion.

Jello: it's what's for dinner.

[Voodoo Chile]

Raised Catholic in Ireland which basically boils down to Baptism 6 months after birth,First Communion,Confirmation and repeat for your kids. Can't remember exactly what it was that I it was all bullshit, But tbh we were hardly devout. It was mass every Sunday(not a big deal to miss it if parents were hungover) and on the holidays. Sit there for 30minutes,listen to the stories bemoan the sermons etc.

I think it was when my local church got this Northern Irish priest(live in the South West of the Republic so far removed from that bullshit up north) who was the hammer and thongs of the Catholic church that started me seeing religion as the parse it is rather then a weekly inconvenience it was. Just he absolute crap he would come up with for a sermon made me hate him and it just spread to everything he stood for.

Following my renouncing of my faith my mum has held out hope that as I got older I'd see the error of my ways and such and I just turned 21 and with that I got the line
"Now that your twenty one,and matured a bit,you'll have to start going to mass again"

My reply had to be "Exactly,I'm a little old to be believing in imaginary friends"

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I think the jello thing might actually have more to do with Mormon culture being so very middle-American at heart, because we've got some very scary jello-based recipes in our family cookbook that long predate my mom's family's conversion.

Jello: it's what's for dinner.

That makes total sense, it's just the uniform level of saturation of horrifying (and yet often delicious) recipes among Mormons everywhere, yes, even right here in Portland, Oregon, that is remarkable.

Also, hi Voodoo Chile. Nice name!

[PeregrineBF]

Raised Jewish, which basically boils down to getting bits cut off a week after birth...
Polish/Russian/German Jewish mother, family fled Nazis, etc. Irish/English/Italian Catholic-raised Father.
Mother is, well, mostly Jewish, with some disillusionment about the whole thing. Father is Christian, in the sense of actually being nice and trying to follow Jesus's teachings. No church or anything, and doesn't call himself religious normally, but tries not to be an asshat. Ignores everything Paul said, that sort of thing. Neither one believes in god in the normal way, they're more deistic than theistic if anything. Can't speak for them though.

So I went to temple, got Bar-mitzvahed, The rabbis always encouraged questioning religion, and I did. Perhaps a bit more than they thought, but they were always encouraging.  No one got angry or upset when I converted to Discordianism, they just said, well, you're a Jewish Discordian, and laughed. (Old joke reference: A man goes to his rabbi, and says, "Rabbi, I want to be an atheist." "Ok," the rabbi says, "but remember, you're a Jewish Atheist.")

Why did I convert? I don't like the Jewish God. So I went looking for another legion. Discordianism fit. I believe that the "goddess" Eris is the inherent chaos in the universe as shown to exist by quantum mechanics. In many ways I'm an atheist, as I don't think it's anything more than that. Then again, I'm not sure where consciousness comes from, it could be that, and if so, would tat make Eris conscious instead of just probability? The Eris I "worship" is the colliective idea of Eris, IE Eris as a meme.

[Pieces]

I was raised Catholic, but never really bought into it. My parents, on the other hand, were pretty devout.

One summer they sent me, along with all the other Catholic kids in the area, to a big sleep-over/rally at the diocese of the region. I was about 13 at the time. I remember we got there a bit late, and the 'fun' (cough cough) was already in full swing. Everybody was singing songs and such, clapping away. I sat down next to this gomer who was completely into the singing and clapping. Big fuckin' smile on his ol' face. He looks over at me.

"Why aren't you clapping?" he asked me.

I replied "Well, I hurt my wrist the other day playing basketball."

His smile fades, and becomes an icy death stare "You know, most people sprain their ankles playing basketball, not their wrists...."

I start slapping the back of my arm.

Later that night, we had a dance. They had one rule... "We like to see Blue, we like seeing Pink, we do not like seeing Purple" This was how they explained that they didn't want the boys and the girls dancing to close to each other, you know, in case they got pregnant (I am not making this shit up). I had met this girl there, and we hit it off really well, so we started dancing. WE REALLY weren't all that close to each other, but every once and a while they would come by and shove a ruler between us. They literally had a goddamn stick that they shoved in between kids that were too close for their comfort.

Next morning, I skip the hymns and the singing and the breakfast, and headed out to the back where these young prep cooks were having a smoke. I bummed a smoke off of them, at sat down on a stool.

"So, are with this religion thing that's going on?" they asked.

"Not anymore".

My parents were completely baffled that a weekend with a whole slew of Catholics turned me into a heathen that took up smoking cigarettes. I told them they should be lucky it's not heroin.

[Kai]

I was raised as a catholic, went to mass weekly, was really hardcore catholic in my early teens. My mother was catholic but fell out of it years ago, disgusted with the church. Her mother and sisters believe in reincarnation, one of them is sorta newagey,and her father is a famous physicist that is more like a deist than anything. I think she doesn't want to support something that doesn't accept her child either, the whole homosexuality/bisexuality is a sin stuff. My dad was raised Lutheran but hes read so much about eastern religions I don't know if he even believes religious stuff anymore. At some point I fell out of Christianity because it felt like bunk and clashed with my scientific leanings. I got into Taoism after reading the Tao Te Ching, fell out of that into Buddhism, and then two summers ago I wrote my own personal manifesto which finally made sense to me. During this whole time I was getting to know Discordianism through this forum, and I guess I stick around here for the discussion and the people more than any sense of a religion. The whole "think for yourself schmuck" philosophy always jived with me. I enjoy writing fiery rants about stupid religious folks and the reception they get here.

Its a bit more complex than that but I'd rather keep the rest to myself.

[Pterodactyl Handler]

I was born a Dinosaur Shaman
and I'll die a Dinosaur Shaman

[Vene]

I was born a Dinosaur Shaman
and I'll die a Dinosaur Shaman

But, pterodactyls aren't dinosaurs.  You're a Pterosaur Shaman.  At best a Dinosaur Shaman heretic.

[Calendula!]

I was born a Dinosaur Shaman
and I'll die a Dinosaur Shaman

But, pterodactyls aren't dinosaurs.  You're a Pterosaur Shaman.  At best a Dinosaur Shaman heretic.

Maybe Pterodactyl Handler  converted to Pt. Shamanism from Dinosaur Shamanism after realizing how oppressive the latter faith was-- but s/he's still a little scared about the "Pit of Fire" that's supposed to await the heretic after death (I think in this faith it's something to do with volcanoes???) and is planning to make a hasty deathbed conversion back to D. Sham. before going to meet his/her Cold-Blooded Maker???

"God" sees what you're trying to do there, PH. It's a risky game you're playing. 

[Cain]

He was clearly born a dinosaur shaman.

And besides, so what if he's a Pterosaur?  Next you'll be saying you have to be born a Jew to be considered a Jew.  You racist.

[Voodoo]

what's the word for people who discriminate on the basis of religion?

and don't say American or Republican or...