Cramson and Delailah

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

And it came to pass afterward, that he loved a woman in the boards of
Principiadiscordia.com, whose name was Delailah.

And the lords of the WOMP cabal came up unto her, and said unto her,
Entice him, and see wherein his great strength lieth, and by what means
we may prevail against him, that we may WOMP him to afflict him; and we
will give thee every one of us an humorous manipulated image.

And Delailah said to Cramson, Tell me, I pray thee, wherein thy great
strength lieth, and wherewith thou mightest be WOMPed to afflict thee.
And Cramson said unto her, If they afflict me with seven green n00bs that
were never tried, then shall I be weak, and be as another man. Then the
lords of the WOMP cabal brought up to her seven green n00bs which had
not been tried, and she afflicted him with them. Now there was Payne and 000 lying in
wait, abiding with her in the chamber. And she said unto him, The
WOMP cabal be upon thee, Cramson. And he trolled the n00bs, as a thread of
AKK is trolled when it toucheth the forum. So his strength was not known.

And Delailah said unto Cramson, Behold, thou hast POSTERGASMed me, and told me
jokes: now tell me, I pray thee, wherewith thou mightest be bound. And he
said unto her, If they annoy me fast with outlandish pinealists that never were
occupied, then shall I be weak, and be as another man. Delilah therefore
took new pinealists, and annoyed him therewith, and said unto him, The
WOMP cabal be upon thee, Cramson. And there were SUCKers in wait abiding
in the chamber. And he brake them from off his pics like a thread.

And Delailah said unto Cramson, Hitherto thou hast POSTERGASMed me, and told me
jokes: tell me wherewith thou mightest be bound. And he said unto her, If
thou WOMPest the seven pics of my head with the web. And she altered
it with the MSPAINT, and said unto him, The WOMP cabal be upon thee,
Cramson. And he awaked out of his sleep, and went away with the WOMP of
the MSPAINT, and with the web.

And she said unto him, How canst thou say, I love thee, when thine heart
is not with me? Thou hast POSTERGASMed me these three times, and hast not told
me wherein thy great strength lieth. And it came to pass, when she
pressed him daily with her words, and urged him, so that his soul was
vexed unto death; that he told her all his heart, and said unto her,
There hath not come a razor upon mine upper lip; for I have been a Discordian
unto Eris from my mother's womb if I be shaven, then my strength will go
from me, and I shall become weak, and be like any other man.

And when Delailah saw that he had told her all his heart, she sent and
called for the lords of the WOMP cabal, saying, Come up this once, for
he hath showed me all his heart. Then the lords of the WOMP cabal came
up unto her, and brought pics in their hand. And she made him sleep
upon her knees; and she called for Payne, and she caused him to shave
off the golden locks of his Moustachios; and she began to afflict him, and his
strength went from him. And she said, The WOMP cabal be upon thee,
Cramson. And he awoke out of his sleep, and said, I will post as at
other times before, and shake myself. And he wist not that the Moustache was
departed from him.

[Cramulus]

and lo,
fuckmittens were tossed into the air

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I wish only that it would be illustrated, but alas, I lack the time this day for illustrating the ballad of Cramson and Delailah.

[Contessa_Ugolino]

 

[hooplala]

Is there an actual Delailah, or am I being hornswoggled again?

[Cramulus]

[Disco Pickle]

I LIKE THIS VERA MUCH!

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

DEAR GOD!

[Jasper]

Hahaa!  Oh shit, I missed this? 

PD, what wonders do your forgotten topics hold?