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Big Bird Brine

Started by phaedrusthemad, October 07, 2008, 05:20:04 PM

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phaedrusthemad

In this house, Autumn means big birds.  My wife loves big birds.  I was never that fond until I stole this recipe.  You will need:

2 C. dark brown sugar
1 C. genuine maple syrup, not Aunt Jemima
¾ C. kosher salt
3 whole heads of garlic, (separate the cloves but do not peel them,) bruised.
6 bay leaves
¾ C. coarsely chopped, unpeeled fresh ginger
1 Tbs. dried chile flakes
1½ C. soy sauce
3 Qt. water
Handful of fresh thyme sprigs.

Large pot
5 gal. foodgrade bucket (liberate or buy a white bucket from a donut shop)


Combine all the brine ingredients in a large pot. Stir and bring to a simmer.  Remove from heat and let cool completely. Remove neck and giblets.  Rinse the bird well and put it in the cold brine. I use a 5 gallon bucket. Add water if the brine doesn't cover the bird.

Refrigerate and Soak for 3 to 4 days (4 days adds a LOT of flavor) turning the bird twice a day. That would be turning it top to bottom. 

Rinse.  Prepare as you please.

However prepared, the meat will be brown and juicy.   :D

Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

Quote from: phaedrusthemad on October 07, 2008, 05:20:04 PM
In this house, Autumn means big birds.  My wife loves big birds.  I was never that fond until I stole this recipe.  You will need:

2 C. dark brown sugar
1 C. genuine maple syrup, not Aunt Jemima
¾ C. kosher salt
3 whole heads of garlic, (separate the cloves but do not peel them,) bruised.
6 bay leaves
¾ C. coarsely chopped, unpeeled fresh ginger
1 Tbs. dried chile flakes
1½ C. soy sauce
3 Qt. water
Handful of fresh thyme sprigs.

Large pot
5 gal. foodgrade bucket (liberate or buy a white bucket from a donut shop)


Combine all the brine ingredients in a large pot. Bring to a simmer, remove from heat and let cool completely. Remove neck and giblets and rinse the bird well and put it in the cold brine. I use a 5 gallon bucket. Add water if the brine doesn't cover the bird.

Refrigerate and Soak for 3 to 4 days (4 days adds a LOT of flavor) turning the bird twice a day. That would be turning it top to bottom. 

Rinse.  Prepare as you please.

However prepared, the meat will be brown and juicy.   :D


I think you'd need at least a 55 gallon drum to fit Big Bird in a brine, I dunno if a white 5 gal bucket would work at all...
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

phaedrusthemad

#2
^True.

Recipe suitable for >20 lb. birds.  Rescale as necessary for emu, ostrich, or Big Bird.


Mesozoic Mister Nigel

I fucking love Thanksgiving and all that fucking cooking and the turkey and the ham! I LOVE IT! I am a shitty indian because not only do I completely disregard Day of Mourning when we are supposed to fast in honor of our murdered and enslaved ancestors, I actually cook up a feast and stuff my greedy fucking face with all the food that traditionally celebrates OUR HIDEOUS OPPRESSION AND SLAUGHTER but fuck me if I'm willing to stop because damn, that shit tastes good.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

Well, the Thanksgiving meal can represent that, if that's the model being used... or it could be a continuation of the tradition started by the Native Americans, by sharing food with strangers. Just because the strangers ended up being assholes, doesn't negate the awesome benevolence, kindness and giving nature of those who lived here. Hell, it speaks far more to their honor, than to our nations bounty.

At least for me. ;-)
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Ratatosk on October 07, 2008, 08:13:31 PM
Well, the Thanksgiving meal can represent that, if that's the model being used... or it could be a continuation of the tradition started by the Native Americans, by sharing food with strangers. Just because the strangers ended up being assholes, doesn't negate the awesome benevolence, kindness and giving nature of those who lived here. Hell, it speaks far more to their honor, than to our nations bounty.

At least for me. ;-)

It could be, as in a Jew could eat bacon on Channukah and make up some reason for it. I could do whatever I want. Turns out, I do!

But the actual holiday is called Day of Mourning and we're supposed to fast.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Suu

Trufax: The happy friendly Wampanoag tribe of MA/Eastern RI are the ones that fed the pilgrims...

The bitchy, cannibalistic "we want a casino and equal rights nao" Narragansett tribe of Southern Rhode Island killed everyone.

:mrgreen:
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

This is proof that not shooting intruders is a BAD IDEA.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


phaedrusthemad

Quote from: Nigel on October 07, 2008, 08:27:03 PM
It could be, as in a Jew could eat bacon on Channukah and make up some reason for it. I could do whatever I want. Turns out, I do!

But the actual holiday is called Day of Mourning and we're supposed to fast.

I thought it was called Yom Kippur.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: phaedrusthemad on October 08, 2008, 01:05:55 AM
Quote from: Nigel on October 07, 2008, 08:27:03 PM
It could be, as in a Jew could eat bacon on Channukah and make up some reason for it. I could do whatever I want. Turns out, I do!

But the actual holiday is called Day of Mourning and we're supposed to fast.

I thought it was called Yom Kippur.

Yes, because American Indians are a lost tribe of Israel.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


LMNO

Quote from: Suu on October 07, 2008, 09:50:22 PM
Trufax: The happy friendly Wampanoag tribe of MA/Eastern RI are the ones that fed the pilgrims...

The bitchy, cannibalistic "we want a casino and equal rights nao" Narragansett tribe of Southern Rhode Island killed everyone.

:mrgreen:

Quote from: Nigel on October 07, 2008, 10:30:03 PM
This is proof that not shooting intruders is a BAD IDEA.

:potd:

Suu

Quote from: Nigel on October 08, 2008, 07:00:43 AM
Quote from: phaedrusthemad on October 08, 2008, 01:05:55 AM
Quote from: Nigel on October 07, 2008, 08:27:03 PM
It could be, as in a Jew could eat bacon on Channukah and make up some reason for it. I could do whatever I want. Turns out, I do!

But the actual holiday is called Day of Mourning and we're supposed to fast.

I thought it was called Yom Kippur.

Yes, because American Indians are a lost tribe of Israel.

:lulz:
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on October 07, 2008, 08:10:44 PM
I fucking love Thanksgiving and all that fucking cooking and the turkey and the ham! I LOVE IT! I am a shitty indian because not only do I completely disregard Day of Mourning when we are supposed to fast in honor of our murdered and enslaved ancestors, I actually cook up a feast and stuff my greedy fucking face with all the food that traditionally celebrates OUR HIDEOUS OPPRESSION AND SLAUGHTER but fuck me if I'm willing to stop because damn, that shit tastes good.

And then Nigel shat turkey on the steps of the Bureau of Indian Affairs, and made the employees eat diseased blankets.

The End.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Anna Mae Bollocks

Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on October 07, 2008, 08:27:03 PM
Quote from: Ratatosk on October 07, 2008, 08:13:31 PM
Well, the Thanksgiving meal can represent that, if that's the model being used... or it could be a continuation of the tradition started by the Native Americans, by sharing food with strangers. Just because the strangers ended up being assholes, doesn't negate the awesome benevolence, kindness and giving nature of those who lived here. Hell, it speaks far more to their honor, than to our nations bounty.

At least for me. ;-)

It could be, as in a Jew could eat bacon on Channukah and make up some reason for it. I could do whatever I want. Turns out, I do!

But the actual holiday is called Day of Mourning and we're supposed to fast.

A lot of Jews go out for Chinese on Christmas.
The reasoning is that "All Chinese food is kosher!"  :lulz:

Quote from: The Dead Reverend Roger on July 24, 2012, 08:49:06 PM
Quote from: PROFOUNDLY RETARDED CHARLIE MANSON on October 07, 2008, 08:10:44 PM
I fucking love Thanksgiving and all that fucking cooking and the turkey and the ham! I LOVE IT! I am a shitty indian because not only do I completely disregard Day of Mourning when we are supposed to fast in honor of our murdered and enslaved ancestors, I actually cook up a feast and stuff my greedy fucking face with all the food that traditionally celebrates OUR HIDEOUS OPPRESSION AND SLAUGHTER but fuck me if I'm willing to stop because damn, that shit tastes good.

And then Nigel shat turkey on the steps of the Bureau of Indian Affairs, and made the employees eat diseased blankets.

The End.

This TOTALLY needs to happen.  :fap:
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

East Coast Hustle

That's a good brine recipe. I know this because it's very nearly identical to mine. The maple syrup in the brine is the key to a transcendent roasted bird.
Rabid Colostomy Hole Jammer of the Coming Apocalypse™

The Devil is in the details; God is in the nuance.


Some yahoo yelled at me, saying 'GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME DEATH', and I thought, "I'm feeling generous today.  Why not BOTH?"