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If you really want to hurt your parents, and you don't have the nerve to be a homosexual, the least you can do is go into the arts. But do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites, standing for absolutely nothing. All they do is show you've been to college.

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One Sentence Rants

Started by Cramulus, December 17, 2008, 08:24:05 PM

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tyrannosaurus vex

#15
December 18, 2008, 05:36:17 PM
I'm glad you're happy with your computer, but I should have told you Linux was a premium OS and pocketed your $300, because at least then whenever you had a problem, you wouldn't immediately assume the issue was with the "Free Operating System."
Evil and Unfeeling Arse-Flenser From The City of the Damned.

Eater of Clowns

#16
December 20, 2008, 05:32:29 PM
I think you're kind've a twat and I'm only being nice to you because you have cancer.
Quote from: Pippa Twiddleton on December 22, 2012, 01:06:36 AM
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on March 07, 2014, 01:18:23 AM
EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

Quote
the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.

Requia ☣

#17
December 21, 2008, 01:22:20 AM
Fuck off
Inflatable dolls are not recognized flotation devices.

Cramulus

#18
December 21, 2008, 05:50:50 AM
I'M GONNA FUCKING STRAP YOU TO A CHAIR AND MAKE YOU READ MARMADUKE COMICS UNTIL YOUR FACE MELTS AND YOUR NIPPLES SQUIRT URINE AND I MAKE YOU DRINK THE URINE

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#19
December 21, 2008, 06:49:13 AM
Quote from: Cramulus on December 21, 2008, 05:50:50 AM
I'M GONNA FUCKING STRAP YOU TO A CHAIR AND MAKE YOU READ MARMADUKE COMICS UNTIL YOUR FACE MELTS AND YOUR NIPPLES SQUIRT URINE AND I MAKE YOU DRINK THE URINE

:potd:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

Mangrove

#20
December 22, 2008, 04:37:39 PM
IF YOU STOP GOING TO SEE ADAM FUCKING SANDLER MOVIES, THEN MAYBE HE MIGHT STOP MAKING THEM!!!!!!!!
What makes it so? Making it so is what makes it so.

Richter

#21
December 22, 2008, 07:07:25 PM
I hate your hair, it makes your body look like a giant penis.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on May 22, 2015, 03:00:53 AM
Anyone ever think about how Richter inhabits the same reality as you and just scream and scream and scream, but in a good way?   :lulz:

Friendly Neighborhood Mentat

pope zero

#22
December 22, 2008, 08:53:07 PM
who died and made you the head penguin?
Its usually the Quiet ones..

Dysfunctional Cunt

#23
December 22, 2008, 09:12:04 PM
One more merry christmas from you and you'll be the tree topper!

Manta Obscura

#24
December 22, 2008, 09:27:12 PM
Quote from: Khara on December 22, 2008, 09:12:04 PM
One more merry christmas from you and you'll be the tree topper!

A.K.A.:

"Bah-Humbug!" -Ebenezer Scrooge, as transcribed by Sir Charles Dickens
Everything I wish for myself, I wish for you also.

the last yatto

#25
December 23, 2008, 01:17:57 AM
when i say i have cold feet it JUST MEANTS THAT, not that im afraid of something as stupid as an idea
Look, asshole:  Your 'incomprehensible' act, your word-salad, your pinealism...It BORES ME.  I've been incomprehensible for so long, I TEACH IT TO MBA CANDIDATES.  So if you simply MUST talk about your pineal gland or happy children dancing in the wildflowers, go talk to Roger, because he digs that kind of shit

pope zero

#26
December 23, 2008, 03:02:45 AM
"Get your paws off me you damn dirty apes!" - Charleston Heston from the planet of the apes
Its usually the Quiet ones..

Richter

#27
December 23, 2008, 03:30:22 AM
Many of these could be meme bombs.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on May 22, 2015, 03:00:53 AM
Anyone ever think about how Richter inhabits the same reality as you and just scream and scream and scream, but in a good way?   :lulz:

Friendly Neighborhood Mentat

Suu

#28
December 23, 2008, 04:55:07 AM
Why oh why can't my sewing machine behave for more than FIVE FUCKING MINUTES OF CONTINUOUS STRAIGHT STITCHING?! WHY?! FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT ASS GOBLIN SINGER FUCKTARD! DIE BITCH DIE!
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Kai

#29
December 24, 2008, 03:49:10 AM
HUMANS SHOULD ALL GO DIE IN A FIRE.
If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. --Loren Eisley, The Immense Journey

Her Royal Majesty's Chief of Insect Genitalia Dissection
Grand Visser of the Six Legged Class
Chanticleer of the Holometabola Clade Church, Diptera Parish
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