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Urgh, this is what I hate about PD.com, it is the only site in existence where a perfectly good spam thread can be misused for high quality discussions.  I hate you all.

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101 things to say to children that will be greeted with silence

Started by Mesozoic Mister Nigel, January 08, 2009, 02:14:43 PM

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LMNO

That's what mothers* do.














































*sombunallbumosoitsnolikethersadiffrencsisit?

Darth Cupcake

Be the trouble you want to see in the world.

Fuquad

Quote from: Darth Cupcake on April 03, 2009, 04:39:53 PM
Quote from: Squid on April 03, 2009, 04:21:06 PM
Quote from: A Pesky Nonvoting Screeching on April 03, 2009, 10:03:51 AM
two lazy two look up the #. Yes, YOU CAN have it. How are you going to PAY for it?

dude, that's a good one.

Be careful what you wish for.

When I was 15, I told my mom I wanted a car when I got my license. She said sure, I could have any car I wanted... if I bought it.

A year and a half later when I got my license, I had $6k in the bank and she was faced with a daughter who was very, very prepared to buy that bright red sports car.

I'm still waiting for her to want a knife.

I mean she's only seven now. When does Knife fascination kick in for kids?

I mean I've got her to the point where I'm confident that if i walk away while she's sooking that she would make it fine with no supervision.

It's mainly an agreement with the mother that keeps me from doing so.


She has started to make french toast better than I do.

Nut anyways.... Knives.... how do you generate intrest bedsides merely giving her the dice, slice and chop jobs?

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the other anonymous

Quote from: A Pesky Nonvoting Screeching on April 04, 2009, 12:36:15 AM
She has started to make freedom toast better than I do.

Is that still funny? Or did I miss an administration?

-toa,
the only truth is in the old jokes

Fuquad

Quote from: the other anonymous on April 04, 2009, 12:46:43 AM
Quote from: A Pesky Nonvoting Screeching on April 04, 2009, 12:36:15 AM
She has started to make freedom toast better than I do.

Is that still funny? Or did I miss an administration?

-toa,
the only truth is in the old jokes
it was never funny. our standards were low at that point.

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Rococo Modem Basilisk

My grandfather always does this senile schtick. My cousins (who are quite young) play along for a while and then eventually get to the stage where it qualifies for this thread.

I think it would work far less well if he actually was senile, though it helps that he doesn't act senile particularly convincingly.


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.

fomenter

Quote from: A Pesky Nonvoting Screeching on April 04, 2009, 12:36:15 AM
I'm still waiting for her to want a knife.

I mean she's only seven now. When does Knife fascination kick in for kids?



Nut anyways.... Knives.... how do you generate intrest bedsides merely giving her the dice, slice and chop jobs?


don't know for girls but dads swiss army getting pulled out and used to mcgiver things (before the tv show existed) in usfull ways got me knife happy at a young age
"So she says to me, do you wanna be a BAD boy? And I say YEAH baby YEAH! Surf's up space ponies! I'm makin' gravy... Without the lumps. HAAA-ha-ha-ha!"


hmroogp

bones

filmmusic

Cain

Anything you say to your kids which is from the....amazingly NSFW Morning Glory webcomic would likely be met with stunned silence at best.

About the most SFW example below:


Fuquad

"Get me meat and some pudding. I'm going to have a dipping party."
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Mesozoic Mister Nigel

"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Doktor Howl

This thread reminds me of when an outraged TGG discovered upon learning to read that Snow White and the 7 Dwarves doesn't end with cannibalism and horror.
Molon Lube

Jasper

The OP made me snark up coffee and I had to run to the bathroom to wipe my nose.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Doktor Howl on October 04, 2010, 10:12:42 PM
This thread reminds me of when an outraged TGG discovered upon learning to read that Snow White and the 7 Dwarves doesn't end with cannibalism and horror.

Hahahaha! Oh god. That, in turn, reminds me that day before yesterday EFO cheerfully said, "Other people's pain is funny."
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Nast

"That may be true, but how do you really feel about it?"
"If I owned Goodwill, no charity worker would feel safe.  I would sit in my office behind a massive pile of cocaine, racking my pistol's slide every time the cleaning lady came near.  Auditors, I'd just shoot."