Screaming Hysterical Nothingness

[LMNO]

I refute Nigel's post with my drumset.

[hooplala]

I understand what you mean Hunter, and I've seen it in myself too.  

The first time I did ecstasy I love love loved it, and tried to find that feeling again, but was never able to.  I realize now that it wasn't really the drug I liked, but that for whatever reason it allowed me to live COMPLETELY in the moment.  I wasn't really able to think about the past very well, and didn't give shit about the future, and did absolutely NO self reflection... that came afterwards in the horrific crash that followed.

I think back on that night with great fondness and often wonder if thats how most other animals live their entire life.  It wasn't intellectual at all, but it was so enjoyable.

[Cainad (dec.)]

OP:

I feel like I'm in a similar position. I hate sounding like a Discordian elitist, but some of these people have no idea what fun is. Luckily, there are a few people on campus who share the sentiment that we ought to do something hysterically fun instead of just getting drunk and doing nothing.

[Bebek Sincap Ratatosk]

to the OP and the very interesting comments!

[Honey]

Some things just never seem to get old.  Like water slides & surfing (whether or not you're mind-altering in other ways)

[Aufenthatt]

Ever notice how truly brilliant this thread is?

[Kai]

Because I think it's generally bad advice for you, me, one, two, whoever.

Aside from the phrasing I take issue with the message.

Three or four years ago I noticed a phenomenon that occurs in about a quarter of the people I spend more than a couple of hours with. Looking back it's always happened, but I just happened to finally notice it. It was the the ability of people to not be where they were. Physically they are there, but they are always looking for the next thing. People invite me over to drink and watch movies, and within an hours they're on their cell phone calling the other friends they have. Is it the poor quality of my company? No, because no matter where we go or who we meet it's always the next big thing. Go to the bar. Now go to the party. We need girls. Now we need different girls. On and on, never contented with their moment.

I just think that this is one piece of advice that desperately needs to filter out the "must" and "always". Those words aren't helping the guy that swears he'll be happy once he leaves this job for that, the one that in six months will be saying the same thing. The post had a "grass is greener" air to it that didn't sit right. I don't feel it should have been directed at any one. Happiness is tricky in this era, and that advice was just too concrete and misguided for my tastes.

I didn't take the message that way. I saw it more like a beginners mind sort of thing. Every time you experience, it should be a fresh and new experience to you, rather than within the nostalgia of the past. Means you are open to new experiences in things you have done before, and living in the present moment. You shouldn't let yourself stagnate.

I thought it was advice I should take.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

You can never re-use fun, you have to make new fun each time. Sometimes you're not done with the first fun for weeks and weeks, even years, but once that fun is over, the next fun has to be a new experience and a new energy.

Feeling a bit bossy today?

Can you re-have the same orgasm a second time? Or is it a different orgasm?

That's all I'm saying.

The new experience is a new experience, not the same as the old experience, even if you're doing the same thing. It takes new energy to have the new experience. I think that sometimes people get caught up in the nostalgia of the old experience, and they bring this expectation that the energy from the old experience will make it happen again, and then they're disappointed.

[hunter s.durden]

I didn't take the message that way. I saw it more like a beginners mind sort of thing. Every time you experience, it should be a fresh and new experience to you, rather than within the nostalgia of the past. Means you are open to new experiences in things you have done before, and living in the present moment. You shouldn't let yourself stagnate.

I thought it was advice I should take.

Right. It can be good advice. It can also be a gateway to headache. Some need that, but I think even more need to go the other way and learn to be happy with what they're already doing, hence the wording issue.

I think almost all advice has a niche where it will work. "Saw off your arm" sounds like a stupid fucking idea, but if you have a horrendous spreading infection it might be exactly what you need to do. The reason I tangled with that post is because it seemed like she was telling us to amputate when some of us just need antibiotics.

Take a mental inventory of a few dozen people you know, and ask yourself "are they more in need of a change of scenery, or just an attitude adjustment toward the old scenery?" I think enough people will fall into the latter to justify my little post.

Can you re-have the same orgasm a second time? Or is it a different orgasm?

That's all I'm saying.

The new experience is a new experience, not the same as the old experience, even if you're doing the same thing. It takes new energy to have the new experience. I think that sometimes people get caught up in the nostalgia of the old experience, and they bring this expectation that the energy from the old experience will make it happen again, and then they're disappointed.

So you're telling me I can't travel through time? Thanks for the info.

I get what you're saying, but I felt this conversation was necessary. Let's use the orgasm. I know many guys who hop from woman to woman looking for some sort of fulfillment. "If I bang this chick I'll feel much better." (I'm not talking about looking for the right one, I'm talking about those guys that are never satisfied) They keep investing new energy into new experience, and getting new disappointment. Sure it CAN be great to experience hundreds of different women, but sometimes that energy is misused. Sometimes it needs to specifically be directed toward something not new.
That's all. Your OP was far too definitive.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I don't think we're even discussing the same thing. I was basically saying "you can do the same thing again, but it's a new experience every time". If you're just seeking to relive a previous experience, it won't be as fulfilling as experiencing it as it's own unique experience... ie. don't get bogged down in nostalgia or trying to recreate something, because it won't work. Sure, it's obvious and logical on one level, but that doesn't mean our irrational minds don't impose that expectation at times.

I'm not saying you have to do something different every time, with a new partner. I'm saying that each time you do it, it's a new experience, and if you let yourself get bogged down with expectation based on past experiences, you won't be focused and bringing your energy to the NOW experience.

[Cramulus]

relating back to the OP--

I used to smoke infrequently. It was a nice escape.
then as I had more time and money on my hands, more frequently.

then eventually every day

then a few times a day.


I eventually realized that I wasn't getting high anymore, and I was having much more fun sober than stoned.



Very gradually, the activity which used to be an escape had become the part of myself I was trying to escape from.

[hunter s.durden]

I don't think we're even discussing the same thing. I was basically saying "you can do the same thing again, but it's a new experience every time". If you're just seeking to relive a previous experience, it won't be as fulfilling as experiencing it as it's own unique experience... ie. don't get bogged down in nostalgia or trying to recreate something, because it won't work. Sure, it's obvious and logical on one level, but that doesn't mean our irrational minds don't impose that expectation at times.

I'm not saying you have to do something different every time, with a new partner. I'm saying that each time you do it, it's a new experience, and if you let yourself get bogged down with expectation based on past experiences, you won't be focused and bringing your energy to the NOW experience.

IIIII think I get it. Like a dissolving of expectation? That's better.

We were definitely mixing apple and and hogloaf there.

Come to think of it we were, in a way, saying the same thing.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

One thing I've (mostly) learned is that every time, for fun to be truly fulfilling, it must be a new experience. It can be a new experience doing the same thing you've done before, but if you try to go back to previous fun and try to re-experience it, you're dabbling in nostalgia and your fun will lack the depth of joy you're trying to relive. Two sayings come to mind: you can never go home again, and each enlightenment is only good for one person, one time. It took me a long time to really understand the meaning of the first one, and the second one was the key to it.

You can never re-use fun, you have to make new fun each time. Sometimes you're not done with the first fun for weeks and weeks, even years, but once that fun is over, the next fun has to be a new experience and a new energy.

I'm talking about not being trapped in nostalgia, basically. No matter how many times I wake up in the morning, it's a new experience. No matter how many times I go to B's house and burn shit in his back yard, it's a new experience. If I let myself be too focused on that one time we did it and it was so much fun and let's try to make that happen again, I'm not having NEW fun, I'm trying to necromance OLD fun. Fun is in the present moment though, not in nostalgia. The 4000th time you have sex with your partner is a new, distinct experience... it's NOT the same sex, or the same orgasm, as the previous 3999 times. But if you start thinking about how awesome it used to be, and try to make it that, it can suck all the energy out of the NOW-sex.

You may think that's so obvious that it should go without saying, but it took me a while to really figure it out, and maybe other people did too.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I don't think we're even discussing the same thing. I was basically saying "you can do the same thing again, but it's a new experience every time". If you're just seeking to relive a previous experience, it won't be as fulfilling as experiencing it as it's own unique experience... ie. don't get bogged down in nostalgia or trying to recreate something, because it won't work. Sure, it's obvious and logical on one level, but that doesn't mean our irrational minds don't impose that expectation at times.

I'm not saying you have to do something different every time, with a new partner. I'm saying that each time you do it, it's a new experience, and if you let yourself get bogged down with expectation based on past experiences, you won't be focused and bringing your energy to the NOW experience.

IIIII think I get it. Like a dissolving of expectation? That's better.

We were definitely mixing apple and and hogloaf there.

Come to think of it we were, in a way, saying the same thing.

Yeah, actually I think we are.

[hunter s.durden]

I eventually realized that I wasn't getting high anymore, and I was having much more fun sober than stoned.

I've gone through that. I don't know how people do that for years and years. Getting stoned everyday gets old after about 3 months. The giggles wear off, and all you are is lazy.