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ITT: Original Story Ideas

Started by Cramulus, May 11, 2009, 09:40:54 PM

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chaotic neutral observer

Ten thousand years ago, a alchemist/sorcerer developed a process to extend his lifespan.  As each organ ages past its prime, he replaces it with an organ harvested from a compatible (and unwilling) donor.  However, every 700 years or so, he needs to replace his brain.  Transferring his consciousness into the new brain requires a much higher degree of compatibility, and since the donor must receive extensive training and preparation in advance, their cooperation is needed.  Since the donor's memories and personality will ostensibly be preserved by the process (granting them a kind of shared immortality), volunteers are not difficult to find.

Present day:  A detective tasked with solving cold cases identifies a pattern in a series of grotesque murders and mutilations going back decades.  As his investigation continues further into history, he becomes convinced that there must be a single entity (possibly some sort of shadowy cult), going back centuries, that is responsible for these incidents.

His investigation eventually gets him close to the alchemist himself.  The alchemist, realizing someone is on his trail, studies the detective covertly, and then confronts him; it turns out the detective would make an excellent brain donor.  The same talents and personality characteristics that led the detective to find him are those prized by the alchemist.

The detective has no intention of participating in the process (and doesn't even believe in it), but decides to play along until he can get evidence strong enough to convict the alchemist of one of the more recent murders.  This is difficult; the alchemist has had thousands of years to perfect not getting caught.

P.S.  I got this idea from this post.
Desine fata deum flecti sperare precando.

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

A spoof of Infinity War where Thanos looks like Michael Jackson and the infinity gauntlet looks like Jackson's sequined glove
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1532
The first colonists to land on Mars discover that they're living in a simulation and that Mars hasn't been fully rendered. Inspired by Elon Musk.

EDIT:
Another 9dea:

Young Donald Trump chops down a cherry tree and blames it on illegal immigrants and/or "the deep state"

EDIT:
Another idea:

Skit: French wino criticizes the bargain booze
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

A christmas special in which the reason why Santa Claus delivers toys on Christmas eve is because long ago he violated elf law and the elves sentenced him to do community service every Christmas forever. And he's depicted as disgruntled and he just tosses packages like a disgruntled UPS driver and so on.
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Con-troll

Short film, starts as a regular looking game show, some of the questions are a bit off, weird shit happens, and in the end the whole cast ends up cannibalizing each other.
I get trauma from stuff most don't even notice.

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1535
Comedy skits:

*"The Telltale Fart"- A man murders his flatulent roommate, but is driven to confess when he can still smell the roommate's fart days later

*Batman's utility belt baggie of "Batijuana"

*Spoofs of the George Washington cherry tree anecdote with other presidents. Trump blames it on illegal immigrants, Andrew Jackson blames it on the natives, FDR takes says he did chop it down but actually had somebody else chop it down as part of a ruse to keep people from knowing he has polio, Reagan asks Gorbachev to take the tree down, Clinton says "I did not chop down that cherry tree", Nixon denies chopping the cherry tree down but then there's tape of him chopping it down,, etc. EDIT: and some of the republicans admit to it and then express a desire to chop down ALL the trees and bulldoze the nation's forests

EDIT:

*A man smokes a bag of radioactive weed (preferably a strain with a spider related name) and gains a variety of weed related abilities, such as the ability to shoot hemp ropes out of his hands, to never get nauseous, and to see through walls and do various other vision related things. (edit: and also Matter-Eater Lad type powers)

EDIT:

*gag: Sign in window of animal rescue place says "Get a cat or the cat gets it"
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Con-troll

As Eve, and whatever the guy was called, get thrown out from the Garden of Eden, God gifts them a jar of semen they must pass forward to their children until 9 months B.C.
I get trauma from stuff most don't even notice.

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1537
In the future genetic editing of embryos is commonplace. As a result of patents choosing traits for their children that make the children easier to raise and/or that reflect the values of their cultures, every ethnicity has become a monoculture of conventionally good looking, straight, conformist nitwits who are all naturally talented at whatever profession their culture overvalues the most (actors, athletes, musicians, and lawyers in america) but nothing else, and who often look like exaggerated stereotypes of their ethnicity. Society begins to stagnate and collapse. A third World War occurs and is won by some of the poorer African nations, who didn't have the money to use the technology on anything but eliminating disorders. These surviving nations, however, are subsequently wiped out by an outbreak of quinine resistant malaria.

EDIT:
Another idea:

QWERTY Ouija boards

EDIT:
Another idea:

Redneck rapper wears deer hunting trophy as giant medallion

EDIT:
Another idea:

A strange reverse version of AA that teaches people to drink more by giving their lives over to Dionysus
(edit: 1. Girst you must admit that you are powerless over your responsibilities and your life has become unmanageable 2. You must come to believe that Dionysus can restore your free time 3. Make a decision to turn your life and your will over to Dionysus ... 11. Seek through heavy drinking to improve your conscious contact with Dionysus ... etc.)

EDIT:
Another idea:

Parody of Doctor Who where the protagonist travels through time in a time traveling port-a-potty called the Time Toilet. The running gag is that he always arrives sitting on the toilet readig the newspaper from the day he just traveled to.
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1538
A mystery solving psychic who can see a murder victim;s's final moments by engaging in acts of necrophilia with their corpse.

EDIT:
Another idea:

I want a copy of the Book of Ecclesiastes where "hevel"/"vanitas" is translated as "Bullshit"
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1539
Dreidel Beyblade

EDIT:
A town of pod people discover that they are gradually being picked off and replaced by The Thing From Another World, which in turn is replaced by realistic looking androids, who then become possessed by Satan
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

minuspace

IT is here and for all foreseeable futures, we done something wrong already.

minuspace

#1541
US border wall funding gives way to emergency "Space Alien Diplomacy Force."

[edit]

Space Force revealed as foil for Time Force: The only game left in town...
When you are The One, even a second of distraction's worth more than ANYTHING!

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

In a world of 12 Monkeys/Terminator 1/Bill & Ted style time travel where the past can't be changed Adolph Hitler's paranoia and madness are driven by time travelers impotently attempting to kill him unaware that the past can't be changed. This causes World War 2.
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Rococo Modem Basilisk

A standard high fantasy hero & villain (from a world that resembles all the worst stereotypes of high fantasy) are transported into our world. The hero must come to terms with the concept of moral ambiguity in order to gain the capacity to move forward, while the villain becomes politically powerful by embracing and endorsing a false moral clarity.


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1544
*Agent 420: Pot Smoking Superspy

*Angry heavy metal cover of the Spongebob theme

*"The Messianic Obstacle Course"- Four Jesuses run a footrace over a patch of stormy water, treating the small waves as hurdles and the large waves as climbing walls

EDIT:
Another idea:

*Blazing Saddles except with a gay sheriff instead of a black sheriff, and it's titled "Flaming Saddles"
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago