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ITT: Original Story Ideas

Started by Cramulus, May 11, 2009, 09:40:54 PM

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Rococo Modem Basilisk

Quote from: Prelate Diogenes Shandor on May 02, 2017, 04:53:40 PM
*After Mars (and possibly Venus, Mercury, and/or Ceres) is colonized something very similar to astrology becomes one of the more legitimate parts of stock market prediction, as the relative positions of the inhabited planets has a predictable effect on how fast messages can be sent between them which in turn has predictable effects on information-based businesses

This is fantastic!

Quote
*Comedy skit: Instead of a pumpkin, Cinderella's carriage is a lemon

The lemon party ends at midnight, or else.


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

2 short skits

*A restaurant similar to McDonalds, except that instead of Ronald McDonald their mascot is John Wayne Gacy

*An argument abouy whether "Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye" is a ripoff of "Land of 1000 Dances"
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Rococo Modem Basilisk

There is a planet where the dominant intelligent life form is a kind of mind-controlling parasitic tapeworm. These tapeworms have the only technological culture on their planet, and have selectively bred their hosts (furry, docile ungulates with very little capacity for thought) and formed a culture around degrading other forms of life on the basis of how similar they are to their hosts -- for instance, terms referring to non-ungulate mammals are common insults & religious taboos exist against eating (or allowing current or future hosts) to eat food touched by fish, amphibians, or insects. In addition to having mind control, these tapeworms also have control over hormone levels in their hosts -- they can increase adrenaline or testosterone in order to make their hosts temporarily stronger. These tapeworms find adrenochrome highly addictive, and so there's a drug trade involved in harvesting it from animals -- but most animals on their planet do not produce it, and there's fairly heavy regulation. Some enterprising drug traffikers have decided to go to other planets and harvest them -- and earth is on their list. While investigating a series of strange, grizzly murders, a detective finds his case taken over by an FBI agent who acts a little weird; he eventually discovers that the FBI agent is being parasitized by a worm who is from the space-worm equivalent of the DEA: the control is not complete (the host species were bred for docility specifically because the worms can't overcome conscious resistance) but the actual FBI agent and the space worm are cooperating because they have a shared goal. The policeman & this FBI-worm hybrid work together to track down the killer, knowing that it must be someone whose will is highly compromised, & eventually discover that the worm is inhabiting various alcoholic binge-drinkers, taking control while they are black-out drunk and maxing out their adrenaline and testosterone to make them physically stronger in order to more effectively kill their human victims -- which causes them to have a severely shortened lifespan. The worm then exits their bodies through the anus and finds a new host (jumping into their mouths). They finally track down and exterminate this worm, take out the refrigerated rental unit where it has been storing its stock of human pineal glands, and celebrate. Then, the policeman shakes hands with the FBI agent, the FBI agent takes off his pants, squats down on the ground, and shits out a six inch long worm, and the worm runs off, jumps into the mouth of a nearby stray dog, and the dog runs off in the direction of the worm's hidden space ship.


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

A science-fiction program set in a world technologically similar to that of Star Trek, except minus all of the actually useful gadgets and devices, leaving just the ones that were included for atmosphere and the ones that malfunctioned and killed people.
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

Something similar to those alternate history novels like "Man in the High Castle" where  the Nazis won WW2, except instead of the nazis, the world has instead been taken over by the regime of some random minor tinpot dictator from history like Fidel Castro, Fulgencio Batisda, Kim Il Sung, Saddam Hussein, Idi Amin, or Francois "Papa Doc" Duvalier
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Rococo Modem Basilisk

Quote from: Prelate Diogenes Shandor on May 04, 2017, 09:58:23 AM
Something similar to those alternate history novels like "Man in the High Castle" where  the Nazis won WW2, except instead of the nazis, the world has instead been taken over by the regime of some random minor tinpot dictator from history like Fidel Castro, Fulgencio Batisda, Kim Il Sung, Saddam Hussein, Idi Amin, or Francois "Papa Doc" Duvalier
Bruce Sterling wrote something *kind of* like this, if it's something you're interested in reading. Pirate Utopia is based on the premise that one of these post-WWI experimental anarchosyndicalist communes became effective & politically powerful (mostly because somebody competent was brought in to handle the manufacture of munitions), with knock-on effects leading to the second world war being circumvented. The result, culturally, is that fascism never got the stigma attached to it that it has, nor did utopian rhetoric of any stripe; the result, historically, is that Harry Houdini, Bob Howard, and H. P. Lovecraft end up working as undercover dipomats for the US government and organize an alliance with the anarchosyndicalist pirate state of Fiune whereby they provide Fiune with nukes.


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1086
Misc ideas:

*Star Trek style teleporter technology has been invented and, sensibly, is extensively used for it's obvious side applications of replicating objects and resurrecting the dead (and occasionally replicating people). Of course, a resurrected person can only be restored to whatever state they were in when the device recorded them, losing any memories after that point. This leads to the world becoming videogame-like with lots of save points scattered about.

*Comedy skit: The mad scientist from Human Centipede has turned his operation into the centerpiece of a fad diet he's invented

*Comedy skit: Hayfever season in Middle Earth. The Ents are performing bukkakae on random passers-by

*I'd like to see something somewhere work in the phrase "Nobility, royalty, and other beneficiaries of nepotism"

EDIT:

Comedy Skit: Hermes, god of thieves and messangers, composes ancient spam missives
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

minuspace

Quote from: Roko's Modern Basilisk on May 04, 2017, 02:23:16 AM
There is a planet where the dominant intelligent life form is a kind of [...]
:)

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

A treatise about the SubGenius god of misfortune and spite, NHGH, in which he is presented as a sort of evil doppelgangar of Sahasra-Bhuja Sahasra-Netra Avalokitesvara, with 1000 eyes with which to glare at people and 1000 hands with which to give people the finger
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

Quote from: Roko's Modern Basilisk on May 04, 2017, 02:23:16 AM
There is a planet where the dominant intelligent life form is a kind of mind-controlling parasitic tapeworm. These tapeworms have the only technological culture on their planet, and have selectively bred their hosts (furry, docile ungulates with very little capacity for thought) and formed a culture around degrading other forms of life on the basis of how similar they are to their hosts -- for instance, terms referring to non-ungulate mammals are common insults & religious taboos exist against eating (or allowing current or future hosts) to eat food touched by fish, amphibians, or insects. In addition to having mind control, these tapeworms also have control over hormone levels in their hosts -- they can increase adrenaline or testosterone in order to make their hosts temporarily stronger. These tapeworms find adrenochrome highly addictive, and so there's a drug trade involved in harvesting it from animals -- but most animals on their planet do not produce it, and there's fairly heavy regulation. Some enterprising drug traffikers have decided to go to other planets and harvest them -- and earth is on their list. While investigating a series of strange, grizzly murders, a detective finds his case taken over by an FBI agent who acts a little weird; he eventually discovers that the FBI agent is being parasitized by a worm who is from the space-worm equivalent of the DEA: the control is not complete (the host species were bred for docility specifically because the worms can't overcome conscious resistance) but the actual FBI agent and the space worm are cooperating because they have a shared goal. The policeman & this FBI-worm hybrid work together to track down the killer, knowing that it must be someone whose will is highly compromised, & eventually discover that the worm is inhabiting various alcoholic binge-drinkers, taking control while they are black-out drunk and maxing out their adrenaline and testosterone to make them physically stronger in order to more effectively kill their human victims -- which causes them to have a severely shortened lifespan. The worm then exits their bodies through the anus and finds a new host (jumping into their mouths). They finally track down and exterminate this worm, take out the refrigerated rental unit where it has been storing its stock of human pineal glands, and celebrate. Then, the policeman shakes hands with the FBI agent, the FBI agent takes off his pants, squats down on the ground, and shits out a six inch long worm, and the worm runs off, jumps into the mouth of a nearby stray dog, and the dog runs off in the direction of the worm's hidden space ship.

That's a cool idea
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1090
Comedy skit: The Sans Seraph has come down from heaven to enforce a divine decree that all bibles henceforth be printed in comic sans

EDIT:
Another idea:

*Comedy skit: An exercise program based on Meatspin

EDIT:
Another idea:

*Alternate history of the mid 20th century in the alliances in World War 2 work out differently, leading to germany remaining allied with russia, instead of betraying them, instead betraying imperial japan, which takes russia's place in history, allying with the US against the Axis but still committing atrocities and also ending up in a 40 year cold war against the US after WW2 is over

EDIT:
Another idea:

A b-movie style science fiction film about an uprising of killer Roombas (thus parodying both the trope of android/robot/computer uprisings and to a lesser extent the trope of killer swarms of small usually harmless creatures (ie. "The Birds", "Night of the Lepus" etc))
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1091
Romeo and Juliet 2- An unauthorized sequel to Shakespeare's play. Each family blames the other for what happened to Romeo and Juliet and as the movie progresses this causes their feud to escalate until eventually it breaks out into an hour long superfight that destroys both families and most of Verona
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Salty

Quote from: Prelate Diogenes Shandor on May 15, 2017, 06:26:49 PM
Romeo and Juliet 2- An unauthorized sequel to Shakespeare's play. Each family blames the other for what happened to Romeo and Juliet and as the movie progresses this causes their feud to escalate until eventually it breaks out into an 72 hour long super mecha fight that destroys both families and most of the earth

Then Shakespeare himself rises from the grave to witness this monstrosity, a character in his own story. He tries to destroy the story from the inside, but Jesus chooses that moment to descend and they both battle over a scarred world for at least a millennium.

fixt.
The world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1093
A superhero film/tv series/comic/whatever focusing on a group of Batman-esque/Iron Man-esque businessman by day gadgeteer superhero by night type heroes. Except these ones are super corrupt in their big business day jobs. The theme song talks about how they're "cleaning up the streets to make it safer for the business criminals".

I got the idea partly from an old Carlin routine about the Republicans (and how they're "against street crime unless that street is Wall Street" and want to "make it safer for business criminals"), but the idea to connect it with superheroes was my own.
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Rococo Modem Basilisk

A group of strangers wake up in a locked cell. They discover that a failed novelist has kidnapped them in order to force them into awkward situations, so that he can study human nature and thereby improve his writing. Some of those situations involve certain people acting out particular stereotyped roles (under threat of death, if they fail to do so suitably well). It's like a cross between Saw and Whose Line Is It Anyway.


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.