News:

To the "allies," if you aren't complicit in my crimes then you are complicit in theirs.

Main Menu

ITT: Original Story Ideas

Started by Cramulus, May 11, 2009, 09:40:54 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Doktor Howl

Quote from: tyrannosaurus vex on February 08, 2018, 04:40:35 AM
humanity spends 1,000 years colonizing space with gigantic cryo-sleeper ships and trade routes that take 100 years to cross, and people can upload their conscious minds to computers to overcome the vast time scales everything takes now, and everything in human culture revolves around waiting 50 years for the Amazon package to arrive. Then, some asshole finally invents dependable faster-than-light engines, and everything will fall apart if the technology isn't immediately suppressed.

Here's one:  A generation ship arrives to find their target planet fully colonized by people who left Earth 50 years after they did, because that's when FTL travel was invented.  And it turns out that the skills needed to colonize a near-Earth planet aren't really all THAT useful on a fully urbanized planet, so they all wind up working in the equivalent of McDonalds/WalMarts, and die in abject poverty some years later.
Molon Lube

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

Quote from: Doktor Howl on February 08, 2018, 04:44:23 AM
Quote from: tyrannosaurus vex on February 08, 2018, 04:40:35 AM
humanity spends 1,000 years colonizing space with gigantic cryo-sleeper ships and trade routes that take 100 years to cross, and people can upload their conscious minds to computers to overcome the vast time scales everything takes now, and everything in human culture revolves around waiting 50 years for the Amazon package to arrive. Then, some asshole finally invents dependable faster-than-light engines, and everything will fall apart if the technology isn't immediately suppressed.

Here's one:  A generation ship arrives to find their target planet fully colonized by people who left Earth 50 years after they did, because that's when FTL travel was invented.  And it turns out that the skills needed to colonize a near-Earth planet aren't really all THAT useful on a fully urbanized planet, so they all wind up working in the equivalent of McDonalds/WalMarts, and die in abject poverty some years later.

No no no, thet're relieved. They were only doing this because that's what their parents wanted. It is a generation ship after all.
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1292
Something similar to the "Who's on First" skit by abbot and costello, but in place of strange nicknames instead revolving around ambiguous use of the phrase "foot fetish" in a store that sells both pornography and lucky rabbit's foot talismans

EDIT:
More ideas:

*The trademark dispute between the World Wildlife Fund and the World Wrestlig Federation is depicted as having been settled by having Hulk Hogam wrestle a bear

*The inner circle of the Republican Party consists of a cult of followers of the religion of the ancient Aztecs. This is why the Republican Party believes that war brings prosperity
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

minuspace

#1293
Quote from: Prelate Diogenes Shandor on February 08, 2018, 05:15:03 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on February 08, 2018, 04:44:23 AM
Quote from: tyrannosaurus vex on February 08, 2018, 04:40:35 AM
humanity spends 1,000 years colonizing space with gigantic cryo-sleeper ships and trade routes that take 100 years to cross, and people can upload their conscious minds to computers to overcome the vast time scales everything takes now, and everything in human culture revolves around waiting 50 years for the Amazon package to arrive. Then, some asshole finally invents dependable faster-than-light engines, and everything will fall apart if the technology isn't immediately suppressed.

Here's one:  A generation ship arrives to find their target planet fully colonized by people who left Earth 50 years after they did, because that's when FTL travel was invented.  And it turns out that the skills needed to colonize a near-Earth planet aren't really all THAT useful on a fully urbanized planet, so they all wind up working in the equivalent of McDonalds/WalMarts, and die in abject poverty some years later.

No no no, thet're relieved. They were only doing this because that's what their parents wanted. It is a generation ship after all.

Subtitle: /Overcoming Technology/
Cover illustration: Tesla Roadster in space with mannequin "driver"

-----
[addendum, 2/10]

We open on protagonist entering a travel agency reminiscent of the original Total Recall film.
Glossy brochures of different travel options are presented by a campy future-retro mannequin service android.
Flipping through them one last time, "I see the free consciousness upload is included with all packages,"
the protagonist remarks in a casual way. A fake bead of sweat forms on the android's forehead as
it responds, "B-because we figured that way there would be less reasons for complaint," after a long
beat, "Consider it like a nescesary backup, something required for our peace of mind, like destination insurance."
"I'm not sure I follow."
"Well, since you're actually the last client I'll ever have, suppose I told you, would you still buy the ticket?"
"What's it to you?"
"Heh," the robot seems to smile, "I suppose it's probably not news to you that otherwise you won't make it?"


Rococo Modem Basilisk

A shock rocker, under studio pressure to produce a follow up to his extremely successful second album, moves into a murder house associated with occult experiments in order to inspire him, at the same time as trying to kick a drug habit he doesn't quite admit he has. However, the house is haunted (or possibly he just has delirium tremens). He finishes the album & his friends are surprised by how stable he's acting, & it's hinted that he is possessed by the killer magus.


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.

Rococo Modem Basilisk

A priest decides that the world's sorry state is because the communion is not literally human flesh and blood, and starts a movement that becomes unexpectedly popular, in part because this ritual causes the memories & vitality of the deceased to be spread among the congregation, who now share a weak psychic link strengthened weekly.


I am not "full of hate" as if I were some passive container. I am a generator of hate, and my rage is a renewable resource, like sunshine.

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1296
One of those insufferable end of innocence stories where some snot-nosed little puke has to come to terms with the untimely death of a friend, except that it gradually transmutes into a knockoff of The Final Destination and as the main character starts to come to grips with the fact that death comes for everybody that's when Death comes for everybody
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

#1297
Ok I just reread my last suggestion and it's kind of stupid as is. Here's how I decided it should go:

The protagonist's friend or dog or father figure almost dies and forces them to comr=e to grips with death. But though they don't die Death is now after them in a Final Destination-esque fashion

alternately

Someone poignantly dies but then they come back from the dead as a ghost or vampire or something and it turns into a supernatural teen romance

alternately

dog/friend/father figure dies and protagonist spends most of the story on a quest for for a magical artifact capable of restoring life, such as the elixir of life, the necronomicon, or the holy grail. The quest succeeds. Alternately they might spend their life developing a Re-Animator-esque serum

EDIT:
Quote from: LuciferX on February 09, 2018, 09:44:28 PM
A fake bead of sweat forms on the android's forehead

I like this. I've got the image in my head here of a cut to a closeup on a nozzle specifically designed to extrude fake beads of sweat.
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

ReverendJesus

Quote from: Prelate Diogenes Shandor on February 18, 2018, 05:04:43 PM
Quote from: LuciferX on February 09, 2018, 09:44:28 PM
A fake bead of sweat forms on the android's forehead

I like this. I've got the image in my head here of a cut to a closeup on a nozzle specifically designed to extrude fake beads of sweat.
As a matter of fact, Ouestionable Content's alternate universe has specifically addressed this issue. They have a little nozzle, and a "thick whitish fluid" comes out.
~Rev. Jesus "H" Christ

HMGMA #D-1-10535-13
Episkopos, Flying Squirrels on Fire Cabal [FSoFCabal.com]
Ordained Minister, Church of the Latter-Day Dude
Minister, Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
Reverend, United Church of Bacon
Minister, Universal Life Church
Clergy, Spiritual Humanist Church
Reverend, Open Ministry
Legionnaire, SORPOEE
Legionnaire, Cabal of Cabbage(tm)
Member, Satanic Temple
Member, Secular Student Alliance
Citizen, Aerican Empire

Answer our survey for a chance* to win one free miracle of your choice!

axod

Quote from: ReverendJesus on February 19, 2018, 01:02:04 PM
Quote from: Prelate Diogenes Shandor on February 18, 2018, 05:04:43 PM
Quote from: LuciferX on February 09, 2018, 09:44:28 PM
A fake bead of sweat forms on the android's forehead

I like this. I've got the image in my head here of a cut to a closeup on a nozzle specifically designed to extrude fake beads of sweat.
As a matter of fact, Ouestionable Content's alternate universe has specifically addressed this issue. They have a little nozzle, and a "thick whitish fluid" comes out.
Yeah, I have this actuator / potentiometer to simulate parasympathetic SLUDGE response with a dedented rotary, but it doesn't do anything kinky.
just this

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

An overweight demon tries several fad diets to try and lose weight including eating only people's souls and eating only pain and sorrow
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

Skit: The Hamburgler's healthfood nut cousin, The Broccoli Raaber
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

Quote from: Prelate Diogenes Shandor on October 06, 2015, 03:30:41 PM
An "Blair Withc"-style amatuer film crew making a film about civics discovers that the real reason why the Republicans talk about Jesus so much is to draw attention away from the fact that they actually worship Mammon, and that this is also the reason why so many black people are executed, because they are Mammon's favorite sacrifice. The crew films several party meetings in secrecy but is eventually discovered and shot down by submachinegun wielding party members as they try to run away. The camera falls down a storm drain after it is dropped. The final expository text at the end explains that no one was charged with their murder due to some bs about stand your ground laws and their film equipment being a "hoax bomb".

I just finished playing the game Night in the Woods and the last act is basically this. Or at any rate the villains spout republican-like rhetoric and sacrifice people to demons, which is ultimately the core gist of this idea.
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

Prelate Diogenes Shandor

Hellraiser sequel: Donald Trump is the newest cenobite. Because he's into that too. His body mod is that his toupee has been sewn into his scalp. EDIT: Also, possibly, tubes implanted into his bladder constantly empty into his throat
Praise NHGH! For the tribulation of all sentient beings.


a plague on both your houses -Mercutio


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrTGgpWmdZQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rVWd7nPjJH8


It is an unfortunate fact that every man who seeks to disseminate knowledge must contend not only against ignorance itself, but against false instruction as well. No sooner do we deem ourselves free from a particularly gross superstition, than we are confronted by some enemy to learning who would plunge us back into the darkness -H.P.Lovecraft


He who fights with monsters must take care lest he thereby become a monster -Nietzsche


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHhrZgojY1Q


You are a fluke of the universe, and whether you can hear it of not the universe is laughing behind your back -Deteriorata


Don't use the email address in my profile, I lost the password years ago

minuspace

Tongue in check mockumentary about the origins of Alexa and the marketing exodus that occurred over branding concerns because the product name was changed from iAlexa, which supposedly was too close to Alexia, a condition they pretended to avoid.