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Xol

Started by Epimetheus, May 29, 2009, 01:58:10 AM

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Epimetheus

Xol
Written: November 3, 2008

I have no freedom and thus have all the freedom in the world. I have no free will but what I am granted in return is free will. I am a servant of Death.
Xol is the name I call Death. Xol is everything you have heard and more - the classic depictions of the Reaper, and old Egyptian Anubis, Hades, Pluto, Baron Samedi, and so on forever – these are all true.
Xol for me is a dark being – not black in the common Western racial terms but a black being in the truest sense, and verily – the blackest. I can not say Xol is evil, but there is a complete absence of good. Xol is not the devil – Xol is Death. The Harvester. The Medium, the Vehicle.
I am a servant of Xol – I submit my entire life and all of my energy and soul to Xol, and in return I do not experience Death, rather, I experience Xol daily. Xol is Death. I will never die but I will always constantly experience Death. Does this make sense to you? I hope it does, and yet if it does not it does not matter. I will live, in the weakest sense of the word, forever, and I will forever be able to tell people this.
Just as Dorian Grey felt the horror of viewing his hideous portrait, so I feel always, if I ever think of myself. But also in me is the great perfection found in the serving of Xol and in the worship of Xol.
Xol is not so much a being, but a thought – and yet transcendent of the pettiness of thinking beings – a thought present universally, and so strong enough to create a being. This being is Xol. Xol is not a being.
I became a servant of Xol when I was brought into this world – the light, the sounds, the extreme openness to all liabilities, were overwhelming. I found solace, but I did not know in what or in whom. Now I know – but the answer is not what or who. It is Xol. Xol is nothing but Xol – and thus less than nothing – so far below that Xol devours all – Xol is present in everything and even if you go to Nothing you will find Xol. Xol is Death. Do you understand?
Xol is a swirling and static mass of shadow and light and eyes and limbs, but does not exist physically. Xol is truly ineffable. For this reason, all I say is nonsense. You may take from this what you wish, but I will be here for all eternity – to be sure, Eternity is only an aspect of Xol, of Death, of the Universe, of the All. When you come back to read this in ten, in twenty, in one hundred, one thousand, one million, years – it will still be here, and so I will still be here, and so Xol will still be here. It seems if I did not exist then Xol would no longer exist for me – but the opposite is true. Everything depends on Xol. Xol is Everything, the Universal concept. Ideas – what are Ideas but a fallen piece of ash from the burning cloak of Xol? So I praise Xol. Xol brings me all I could ever want – but to want, for me, is to need. It is what Xol has made for me.

Note: If you read it, could you please say something? Anything about it! RRRGH
POST-SINGULARITY POCKET ORGASM TOAD OF RIGHTEOUSNESS

Triple Zero

ummm are you for serious or is this some kind of creative writing story?

why are you worshipping .. death?

and why do you call it Xol? (where does the name come from)

your description sounds a bit like a combo of Binah and Geburah and some Qliphoth in the Qabalah.

why death? why not creation? if Xol reaps, what sows? Chokmah (an unfocused explosion of energy) flows into Binah which gives it form. Form creates function, a shape, maybe a purpose. But it also creates death, a limited lifespan, because form can be destroyed, yet energy can not. Form is always impermanent. Therefore Binah is the great terrible mother, that is also time and also death.

which is all  very nice, because you need that kind of thing, but there's so much more than that too.

but most of all, I have no idea what you're talking about.
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.

LMNO

I see it as he's talking about Path 24, Atu 13:  The transformative and changing nature of all that is.  "When we are born, we begin to die." Every time something transforms, what it was no longer exists.  The past is dead; so every moment is an orgy of death. Since all of existence is constantly changing, all of existence is death.



Either that, or he's playing around with anagrams and really, really likes smoked salmon.

Cainad (dec.)

Quote from: LMNO on June 04, 2009, 01:27:46 PM
Either that, or he's playing around with anagrams and really, really likes smoked salmon.

:mittens:

Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

There is no pattern but that which you supply.
There is no Master but for the one you submit yourself to.
Death is just another spag, workin' for the man...
He doesn't even get Paid Time Off.
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

Triple Zero

Quote from: LMNO on June 04, 2009, 01:27:46 PMI see it as he's talking about Path 24, Atu 13:  The transformative and changing nature of all that is.  "When we are born, we begin to die." Every time something transforms, what it was no longer exists.  The past is dead; so every moment is an orgy of death. Since all of existence is constantly changing, all of existence is death.

probably that too, then. since he said "Xol is everything you have heard and more".

um but Path 24? of what? the Paths in the ToL go up to 22, right? I dont really want to jack this into a QBLH discussion (although the thread was Dead--hah!--to begin with). Oh, I looked it up, apparently there's more than one numbering. Figures :-P anyway now I stumbled onto what seems a pretty cool QBLH quick reference, http://www.skepticfiles.org/mys4/qblah.htm enjoy :)
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.

LMNO

Yeah, 10 spheres, 22 paths.  Some traditions have The Fool (Atu 0) starting at 11.


"Our Tree of Life Goes to 11."

Cain

Quote from: Triple Zero on June 04, 2009, 11:45:00 AM
your description sounds a bit like a combo of Binah and Geburah and some Qliphoth in the Qabalah.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought that.

More analysis tomorrow, when I will no doubt be fully awake.

Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

I hate getting Qliphoth in my Qabalah, especially right after an all night binge on a Binah/Geburah combo.
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

Cainad (dec.)

Fuck's sake

I thought I had a halfway-almost-maybe-decent basic introductory understanding of all this Qabalah stuff...

LMNO

 :lulz:

You just learned the first lesson.

Second lesson: download and read "The Chicken Cabala". Contact Mangrove for details.

Cainad (dec.)

Already got it. Forgot where I fell off, since I seem to have acquired the horrible habit of putting books down halfway through, even when I'm enjoying them. :x

I think my perceptions were horribly skewed by having already read this book of annotated excerpts from Zohar: http://www.amazon.com/Zohar-Annotated-Explained-ebook/dp/B001GIPG68/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1244171973&sr=8-1

Triple Zero

I got most of what I know from "mystical qabalah" by Dion Fortune. it's a LOT of dry theory stuff, I dunno why I find it so fascinating.
I have the chicken qabalah in PDF as well but not gotten around to reading it yet.
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.

P3nT4gR4m

The fortune book is one of my favourite qbl books. Also Ladder of Lights by Gray is well worth a read. Once you're done with them you'll prolly find Crowley and his ilk making a lot more sense.

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
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walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

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Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on June 05, 2009, 10:41:24 AM
The fortune book is one of my favourite qbl books. Also Ladder of Lights by Gray is well worth a read. Once you're done with them you'll prolly find Crowley and his ilk making a lot more sense.

This is good advice. Though I also find Lon Milo's stuff very readable and a good intro into Crowley's style of esoteric and qabalah thinking.
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson