Whatever

[Nast]

Yep.  This guy's a bozo.  End of story.

Am I going to get any actual criticism though? Or will this just stay as a big HURR DURR from the sidelines?

hxxp://www.everyauthor.com/

[Triple Zero]

Yep.  This guy's a bozo.  End of story.

Am I going to get any actual criticism though? Or will this just stay as a big HURR DURR from the sidelines?

Um, you got criticism? What did you expect?

[Captain Utopia]

You still haven't managed to say anything. I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt as the only vague message I can discern "keep shitting over my planet", is such an obviously dumb concept that I am hoping that you have something vaguely beyond the surface to offer.

See what I did there? Optimism kicks pessimism in the balls every time, because pessimism wants pain. Not saying you want pain, just as long as you hold onto your self-destructive pessimistic behaviour patterns, you can expect to observe nothing else.

[Triple Zero]

OKAY CRITICISM YOU ASK WE PROVIDE

A pile of cigarette butts higher which reaches me knees

seriously? that's pretty impressive.

unless you're a midget.

in either case, PICS PLEASE

(and if you're a midget, include yourself on the pics)

along with the discoloured and sodden crap of I don't know what.

did you find out what it was?

WHAT WAS IT

ENQUIRING MINDS NEED TO KNOW

(also you could have totally used something impressively symbolic instead of "I don't know what", missed opportunity, really)

The concrete which creeps ever onwards along the ground

is this in your room?

problem with the carpet? i thought you said you're the manager, so why do you live in a room with shitty carpet where the concrete shows through?

the rusty brick walls surrounding me

how can brick walls be rusty?

"rust" is generally known as oxydized metal, usually iron. "brick" means stone, lacking metal and/or iron.

the sickly smog which i'm breathing - it's all a wound. It's the typical shit which those damn hippies whine about, "we're killing the earth man, it's like bad for the planet".
Suck my dick.

this is a straw man.

This cancer's gone beyond critical, we've come too far to heal this wound. I say embrace it. I hate to sound like Mr. Durden here, but hit me as hard as you can. Litter, corrupt, destroy, whatever, it makes no differance. Just do it. Come, heap fire and heap petrol 'pon the pyre! Enough of this shit, let's go out with a bang. Oh, i'll probably wake up tomorrow happy as a baby, but while i'm sucking down these tubes of death i'll bring the end along for a ride...

and this appears to be the entire point of your pathetic little rant.

perhaps you should read up on "je ne sais quois", because your writing doesn't have ANY of it.

see, us Discordians (I know the others don't like if any of them speaks for anyone, heheh), we don't mind a littlebit of fire, we LIKE mr Durden (he's our little bitch, you see), littering not so much, corruption is a really sharp blade so be careful, and destruction sure thing. going out with a bang? it's the only way.

BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN WE'RE IN A FUCKING HURRY IF THERE'S FUN TO BE HAD ALONG THE WAY, nononono it's the fun first, you see.

otherwise you're going to be "that guy". you know him, Brad Pitt was Mr Durden, but he also was "that guy" in 12 Monkeys, who was laughing and laughing when everything was going to shit, but he WASNT HAVING FUN, no he was laughing cause he didnt know what else to do, finally everything was going to shit and ... hey fuck NOW WHAT DO I D--glrbrbgb the end. SUCKER.

so what now do you do?

you woke up happy as a baby the next morning and ... what did you get?

an evening feeling shitty about yourself and screaming at the digital internet world that some non-existant straw hippies could suck your dick and some people to corrupt, destroy, set shit on fire.

WHILE YOU COULD HAVE GONE OUT, GOT YOUR DICK SUCKED BY REAL HIPPIES AND CORRUPT, DESTROY AND SET SHIT ON FIRE AND HAVE A REAL GOOD TIME (it makes no "differance", phah!)

now, fuck off or start being interesting.

[MMIX]

Yep.  This guy's a bozo.  End of story.

Am I going to get any actual criticism though? Or will this just stay as a big HURR DURR from the sidelines?

You could try giving up smoking if they have such a bad effect on you - downers for the down under hunh?
If nicotine gives you nihilism - just say no!

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Yep.  This guy's a bozo.  End of story.

Am I going to get any actual criticism though? Or will this just stay as a big HURR DURR from the sidelines?

This isn't Creative Writing 101. If you want C&C join a writers group or take a class.

[Kai]

Are you saying rants don't say anything? If you don't have anything to say, best keep it to yourself.

No, I think that rant's have no meaning unless they are given to it. Someone (ie. those who've replied) can go ahead and not give any relevance, meaning, etc. to a piece of writing, whereas someone else could use it as gospel. Not only that but the relevance words have is also determinined by the context, etc.

Your whole "rant" was akin to Christian rapture talk. "It doesn't matter because it's the end of times and the Lawrd will save us anyway".

Quite the opposite, it's intended as a rage through use of sarcasm.

You need to work on your depiction of sarcasm in writing. It comes off to me as emo nihilism, and your choice of subject makes it something I can't relate to at all.

[cadaver]

You need to work on your depiction of sarcasm in writing. It comes off to me as emo nihilism, and your choice of subject makes it something I can't relate to at all.

Thanks, I'll try to do so in the future

You could try giving up smoking if they have such a bad effect on you - downers for the down under hunh?
If nicotine gives you nihilism - just say no!

Haha, I really wouldn't say it gives me nihilism, more so something that helps me through it when I'm feeling that way. I'd consider myself as more of an absurdist anyway.

OKAY CRITICISM YOU ASK WE PROVIDE

A pile of cigarette butts higher which reaches me knees

seriously? that's pretty impressive.

unless you're a midget.

in either case, PICS PLEASE

(and if you're a midget, include yourself on the pics)

along with the discoloured and sodden crap of I don't know what.

did you find out what it was?

WHAT WAS IT

ENQUIRING MINDS NEED TO KNOW

(also you could have totally used something impressively symbolic instead of "I don't know what", missed opportunity, really)

The concrete which creeps ever onwards along the ground

is this in your room?

problem with the carpet? i thought you said you're the manager, so why do you live in a room with shitty carpet where the concrete shows through?

the rusty brick walls surrounding me

how can brick walls be rusty?

"rust" is generally known as oxydized metal, usually iron. "brick" means stone, lacking metal and/or iron.

the sickly smog which i'm breathing - it's all a wound. It's the typical shit which those damn hippies whine about, "we're killing the earth man, it's like bad for the planet".
Suck my dick.

this is a straw man.

This cancer's gone beyond critical, we've come too far to heal this wound. I say embrace it. I hate to sound like Mr. Durden here, but hit me as hard as you can. Litter, corrupt, destroy, whatever, it makes no differance. Just do it. Come, heap fire and heap petrol 'pon the pyre! Enough of this shit, let's go out with a bang. Oh, i'll probably wake up tomorrow happy as a baby, but while i'm sucking down these tubes of death i'll bring the end along for a ride...

and this appears to be the entire point of your pathetic little rant.

perhaps you should read up on "je ne sais quois", because your writing doesn't have ANY of it.

see, us Discordians (I know the others don't like if any of them speaks for anyone, heheh), we don't mind a littlebit of fire, we LIKE mr Durden (he's our little bitch, you see), littering not so much, corruption is a really sharp blade so be careful, and destruction sure thing. going out with a bang? it's the only way.

BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN WE'RE IN A FUCKING HURRY IF THERE'S FUN TO BE HAD ALONG THE WAY, nononono it's the fun first, you see.

otherwise you're going to be "that guy". you know him, Brad Pitt was Mr Durden, but he also was "that guy" in 12 Monkeys, who was laughing and laughing when everything was going to shit, but he WASNT HAVING FUN, no he was laughing cause he didnt know what else to do, finally everything was going to shit and ... hey fuck NOW WHAT DO I D--glrbrbgb the end. SUCKER.

so what now do you do?

you woke up happy as a baby the next morning and ... what did you get?

an evening feeling shitty about yourself and screaming at the digital internet world that some non-existant straw hippies could suck your dick and some people to corrupt, destroy, set shit on fire.

WHILE YOU COULD HAVE GONE OUT, GOT YOUR DICK SUCKED BY REAL HIPPIES AND CORRUPT, DESTROY AND SET SHIT ON FIRE AND HAVE A REAL GOOD TIME (it makes no "differance", phah!)

now, fuck off or start being interesting.

It gets cleaned up every month or two, but i'll take a picture next shift.
The I don't know what is the general crap you'd expect to be in an lane way - empty drink bottles, fast food packaging, general rubbish. As for the walls, they're rust coloured.
What says I don't go out and do shit instead of whining about it though? I guess yeah, I could actually do something more with any ideas I have, and I am continuing to build that up.
Thanks for the response though ^_^

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Yep.  This guy's a bozo.  End of story.

Am I going to get any actual criticism though? Or will this just stay as a big HURR DURR from the sidelines?

You haven't merited actual criticism.  Write something worth debating about, and we'll see.  Until then...

HURR DURR

[Richter]

So i'm sitting in the shithole behind the other shithole where I make my living, 28 hours awake and sucking in cancer sticks like there's no tomorrow, and shit I can't help but feel I'm sitting in a wound. A pile of cigarette butts higher which reaches me knees waits by my side, along with the discoloured and sodden crap of I don't know what. Shit, it's a fucking wound on the face of the planet. But it doesn't end there. The concrete which creeps ever onwards along the ground, the rusty brick walls surrounding me, the sickly smog which i'm breathing - it's all a wound. It's the typical shit which those damn hippies whine about, "we're killing the earth man, it's like bad for the planet".
Suck my dick. This cancer's gone beyond critical, we've come too far to heal this wound. I say embrace it. I hate to sound like Mr. Durden here, but hit me as hard as you can. Litter, corrupt, destroy, whatever, it makes no differance. Just do it. Come, heap fire and heap petrol 'pon the pyre! Enough of this shit, let's go out with a bang. Oh, i'll probably wake up tomorrow happy as a baby, but while i'm sucking down these tubes of death i'll bring the end along for a ride...

It's gratifying to think you can "end" the world, but that's not conventionally possible to do.  At best we can change it.

Also, it seems like you're blurring the lines between giving up on yourself and giving up on everything else. 
Kind of reminds me of the intonation of a Bokononist commiting suicide, "And now I will destroy the whole world!".  (Kurt Vonnegut)