Principia Discordia > Or Kill Me

Roger's Got a Brand New Bag

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The Good Reverend Roger:
The Good Reverend has decided to convert to evangelical Christianity.

There.  I said it.

There are many reasons for this decision, and I'd like you all to consider them.  First and foremost, the weird sex...Apparently, a requirement for being an evangelical Christian pastor is to have deranged sex with as many members of your congregation as is humanly possible.  Best of all, you don't have to have sex in filthy airport bathrooms unless you also happen to be a congressman.

Second, the money.  Have you SEEN the long green these guys pull down?  They make in about 10 minutes what I make in a year, and it's TAX FREE (within limits...we must remember the fate of Jim Bakker, who laughed at all the wrong jokes until they threw him in prison).  As a famous pastor once said, Jesus wore designer clothes.  I seek only to emulate him.

Third, and possibly the most important reason, is that I've had it up to HERE with the mamby-pamby prophecies put forth by the wimps and losers who have dared to step up where Robert Tilton fell.  With the exception of my personal hero, Pat Robertson, these guys are afraid to call down the anger of an angry God on anyone.  Sure, they holler that God is gonna kill us all because we don't execute homosexuals, but when was the last time they actually stood up and invoked the wrath of the almighty?  No, no, only Pat Robertson had the GUTS to DEMAND that God kill 4 supreme court justices, the state department, and every feminist, everywhere...and for that, I shall always look up to him as a mentor and role model.

The first Podcasts should go up this week, and if you don't watch them, you're going to hell. 

Or kill me.

TGRR,
Mad Profit Prophet

Kai:
Praise the Lord! Halleluja!

The Good Reverend Roger:

--- Quote from: Kai on August 31, 2009, 04:18:59 am ---Praise the Lord! Halleluja!

--- End quote ---

Thank you, Brother, and please put your love offering on the plate when it comes by.

fomenter:

--- Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on August 31, 2009, 04:37:17 am ---
--- Quote from: Kai on August 31, 2009, 04:18:59 am ---Praise the Lord! Halleluja!

--- End quote ---

Thank you, Brother, and please put your love offering on the plate when it comes by.

--- End quote ---
:lmnuendo:

The Good Reverend Roger:

--- Quote from: fomenter on August 31, 2009, 04:56:53 am ---
--- Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on August 31, 2009, 04:37:17 am ---
--- Quote from: Kai on August 31, 2009, 04:18:59 am ---Praise the Lord! Halleluja!

--- End quote ---

Thank you, Brother, and please put your love offering on the plate when it comes by.

--- End quote ---
:lmnuendo:

--- End quote ---

Just what I would expect from a Godless freak such as yourself, sir.

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