WAR!

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Swamp Yankees and the Road to War.

EPIC!

[The Good Reverend Roger]

PAYNE!  That was amazing!

[Pariah]

 
Payne: The Stephen Ambrose of PD

[Bu🤠ns]

Wow...that was incredible 

[Payne]

The Fall of Pennsylvania

Baconkrieg! The Swamp Yankee War Machine Unleashed

The Principles of Baconkrieg, which was to be used to great effect in Pennsylvania

The Swamp Yankees now had the military might and the political will to act on their ambitious territorial and martial aims. Strategically, their aims had always been towards Ohio, and it was in this direction that they now focused their efforts. In the way stood Pennsylvania, a land that had seen much fighting in the past, and also proved to be fertile ground for engineering a crisis that would, hopefully) allow Suutler to push onwards to her intended target.

The principles of Baconkrieg were the most effective way to use the resources the Swamp Yankees had at their disposal, and politically, quicker victories would be more acceptable on the world stage than any kind of drawn out conflict.

Swamp Yankee propaganda, in which the Swamp Yankee "Fat Man" wrestles with the Great Ohioan Deer

The Ohioans, of course, were no pushovers and were well aware of the Swamp Yankees aims. A pact had been drawn up between the two powers to stall outright conflict as long as possible, the better for both sides to feel more capable of the kind of war that was bound to happen between them. Historically, too, Ohio had claim to Pennsylvania and was not going to just let the Swamp Yankees swallow it whole. A deal was forged between them that any attack would have to shared between them, and for Ohio, the pretext of a Swamp Yankee invasion would be enough for them to violate Pennsylvanian territory.

The Swamp Yankees themselves had to create their own pretext for war.

Swamp Yankees at the Pensylvanian Border, the first step on the road to war.

Ohio joins in the attack, encircling Pensylvania and causing it to fall very quickly.

When war came to Pennsylvania, it came suddenly. The little state was unprepared for the full might of the Swamp Yankee offensive, and the Ohioans moving in from the opposite border (ostensibly to defend Pennsylvanian sovereignty) meant that they would crumble almost immediately.

Suutler inspects her new territory, and plotting her next move.

After the attack, Suutler and other top ranking Swamp Yankees inspected Pennsylvania. They were there to glory in their victory but also to plot their next move. The attack would likely cause some political friction with the Pennsylvanians allies, and of course the Swamp Yankees now shared a border with Ohio.

The Scottish Empires Leader, P3nTerlain, who believed peace was possible with the Swamp Yankees was forced to declare war.

On the news of the attack, the Grand High Imperial Emperor of The Scottish Empire was shocked. He had spent much time and effort in stalling and placating Suutler and the Swamp Yankees, and had received assurances that no such attack on Pennsylvania would occur. He demanded the withdrawal of all Swamp Yankee forces from the state, and when he ws ignored, he was forced to declare war in defence of his ally.

[Fredfredly ⊂(◉‿◉)つ]

FRED, THE QUEEN OF OHIO, WOULD LIKE TO STATE THAT OHIO IS NOT PART OF THE SWAMP YANKEE ALLIANCE.

IF ANY ADVANCES WERE MADE INTO PENNSYLVANIA IT WAS FOR THEIR OWN GOOD.

[Epimetheus]

Is it just me or does the guy I circled look a bit too much like Roger?

[Payne]

That's Roger von Stauffenburg.

[Pope Pixie Pickle]

Reports have come in of a dangerous chemical weapon being devised by the euro-spags under the supervision of lord P3nt.

the crack minds working on this were last seen lost on the streets of Amsterdam giggling thier asses off and muttering about how the Swamp Yankees will not be a problem after this goes off... if they have the sense to get a cab back to the compound after the stop for snacks they will be unstoppable, once the device is launched at Rhode Island.


known side effects of the bomb are the munchies, red eye, and in some cases falling asleep or being incapacitated by giggling, along with a reluctance of civilian populace to give a shit.


I have been told that they did get the cab back after the munchies run, we have attacked their motivations and supply stores in one hit, victory shall be swift, and smell of sweet sweet THC will fill Rhode Island in 10 minutes.

[Cainad (dec.)]

This thread violates FCC regulations by having too much EPIC MITTENS AND WIN distributed across too few pages. It's a fire hazard, don'cha know.

[Jenne]

(methinks that's why it's unstickied...it's for the children, after all)

[LMNO]

I could sticky it if you wanted.  But my opinion is to let it run it's course.

[Pariah]

X-post, but still

[0]

Hey so....I GUESS THE SWAMP YANKEES WIN! YES! IN YOUR FACE LOOZERS! HA!!!!! WOOOOOOO!!!!!!

[Pariah]

Hey so....I GUESS THE SWAMP YANKEES WIN! YES! IN YOUR FACE LOOZERS! HA!!!!! WOOOOOOO!!!!!!

HAHAHA SO YOU THOUGHT
All this time we've been working on a secret weapon
MUHAHAHAHHA
6/0

A GIANT BLACK HOLE!

LOOK AROUND YOU GENERAL, WHERE IS YOUR ARMY NOW!
YOU CAN'T SEE THEM CAUSE THEY ALL READY HAVE PASSED THROUGH THE EVENT HORIZON AND OUR BEING SPAGHETTIFIED AS WE SPEAK