A list of obvious things.

[Kai]

Being in the mood right now, I sorta want to punch the OP in the face for assuming everyone has this primal urge to assault who ever happens to be closest, like some sort of sociopathic tourettes.

I'm assuming you mean the sight it was posted on, I think La Terrorista was just pointing out how stupid it is.

That said, a hot lady walked into the elevator today, and I was just about to assault her when I remembered this post, and realised that I probably shouldn't assault strangers in elevators.

They were? Could have fooled me.

Also,  

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I have urges to assault people all the time.  Especially in elevators.

But I don't want to sexually assault them.  I just want to grab them and shake the shit out of them while screeching prophecy into their faces, like a modern day Samuel.

Someone has to.

[Cain]

I'm surprised fictionpuss hasn't already approved these to counter PD.com's pro-abuse memebombs

/snark

Now, now.  He's getting better.  I think the lad has potential.

Oh, he does, for sure.

But you, I and everyone reading this thread was thinking it.  I was going to burst if someone didn't say it.

I was simply obeying my new oath to stop abusing noobs.

Is he still a noob?  I think so.  But, again, he's improving.

I would have gone with non-noob.  But agreed.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I'm surprised fictionpuss hasn't already approved these to counter PD.com's pro-abuse memebombs

/snark

Now, now.  He's getting better.  I think the lad has potential.

Oh, he does, for sure.

But you, I and everyone reading this thread was thinking it.  I was going to burst if someone didn't say it.

I was simply obeying my new oath to stop abusing noobs.

Is he still a noob?  I think so.  But, again, he's improving.

I would have gone with non-noob.  But agreed.

To my mind, "noob" is a state of mind, not a post count.  Pixie was a noob for about 5 minutes, and Enki will probably always be one, for a couple of examples.

[Richter]

Being in the mood right now, I sorta want to punch the OP in the face for assuming everyone has this primal urge to assault who ever happens to be closest, like some sort of sociopathic tourettes. "Assault someone on accident"? "If you are not able to stop yourself from assaulting people"? Are we REALLY stuck in a pre-industrial idiocy where people (but I know you meant men, Terrorista) can't be faulted for just running up and raping and assaulting people in broad daylight because we're just MADE like that, like "Oh shit man, I'm getting the rape impulse on that girl overthere, quick BLOW THE WISTLE!" This sort of stupidity passes on stereotypes and actually ENABLES people to act like that, because "like man I just can't help assaulting people, it just happens and before you know it I'm raping some girl on the sidewalk" is the most stupid fucking excuse ever.

 

Thanks Kai, That NICELY summed up that annoying sentiment about anythign that happens to be male.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Wait.

Is everyone here of the opinion that La Terrorista actually believes this shit?

[LMNO]

Being in the mood right now, I sorta want to punch the OP in the face for assuming everyone has this primal urge to assault who ever happens to be closest, like some sort of sociopathic tourettes. "Assault someone on accident"? "If you are not able to stop yourself from assaulting people"? Are we REALLY stuck in a pre-industrial idiocy where people (but I know you meant men, Terrorista) can't be faulted for just running up and raping and assaulting people in broad daylight because we're just MADE like that, like "Oh shit man, I'm getting the rape impulse on that girl overthere, quick BLOW THE WISTLE!" This sort of stupidity passes on stereotypes and actually ENABLES people to act like that, because "like man I just can't help assaulting people, it just happens and before you know it I'm raping some girl on the sidewalk" is the most stupid fucking excuse ever.

 

Thanks Kai, That NICELY summed up that annoying sentiment about anythign that happens to be male.

Hold on... That post was adressed to GUYS!?

[Cain]

Wait.

Is everyone here of the opinion that La Terrorista actually believes this shit?

Nope.  99.98% sure that La Terrorista posted this to mock the silly internet "feminists" (as an aside, I'm sure at least at one point, the F-word was considered a fairly good site.  But I am not up on my internet feminist politics).

[Darth Cupcake]

Wait.

Is everyone here of the opinion that La Terrorista actually believes this shit?

Nope.  99.98% sure that La Terrorista posted this to mock the silly internet "feminists" (as an aside, I'm sure at least at one point, the F-word was considered a fairly good site.  But I am not up on my internet feminist politics).

Cause, you know, by using the same old tired line of mocking the "feminists," La Terrorista shows how she (I assume) is just like SO MUCH COOLER than all of THEM and OH WOULD WE PLEASE GIVE HER BIG PATS ON THE BACK AND HUGS?

My first instinct on opening this thread was to roll my eyes and yawn. Heard it all before.



EDIT: In fact, I'm pretty certain that exact first post has already been posted here.

[LMNO]

Maybe we should both sexually assault La Terrorista.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Having re-read the original post, I think her intent was to create other lists, equally inane, and place them here and there.

I think this thread would have gone over better in OMF.

[Cain]

Wait.

Is everyone here of the opinion that La Terrorista actually believes this shit?

Nope.  99.98% sure that La Terrorista posted this to mock the silly internet "feminists" (as an aside, I'm sure at least at one point, the F-word was considered a fairly good site.  But I am not up on my internet feminist politics).

Cause, you know, by using the same old tired line of mocking the "feminists," La Terrorista shows how she (I assume) is just like SO MUCH COOLER than all of THEM and OH WOULD WE PLEASE GIVE HER BIG PATS ON THE BACK AND HUGS?

My first instinct on opening this thread was to roll my eyes and yawn. Heard it all before.



EDIT: In fact, I'm pretty certain that exact first post has already been posted here.

Oh sorry, I didn't realize making fun of stupid things was now forbidden.

And yes, no doubt the first post was definitely an attack against all feminists everywhere, of every inclination, and most certainly not mocking those self-declared feminists who wrote this idiocy in the first place.

Its a good thing we asked La Terrorista to clarify, instead of blindly assuming, isn't it?

[BabylonHoruv]

I"d like to offer an alternative list for TROOF about monkeys.


Whereas humans are simians that often act on base impulses and hurt other people, and

whereas the majority of human relations is power games meant to assert dominance in some manner, and

whereas neither of these traits seem to have any specificity, they are ubiquitous,

therefore, the following suggestions:

1. Be Prepared - Crazy prepared if possible (cf. Richter). Have the right tools for the right situation. If a can of pepper spray suits your situation then have one. A person should be dependent upon their own items, skills and abilities whenever possible, and not rely on someone else, because who knows when they will actually come through?

2. Watch your back - Simians have the tendency to turn any situation into a bad one. Be responsible, look out for these situations coming. Take martial arts or self defense, or at least know where the vulnerable points on a human body are located. Learn to read your surroundings, have constant awareness of whats going on around you, especially in situations where you are the sole person watching your back. Learn to read people and their reactions.

3. Don't compromise your intuition - Alcohol is great but it muddles the mind. Don't drink or take substances in situations you are not completely confident of your abilities and are not surrounded by people you trust. It's far too easy to make mistakes of judgment and end up in a bad way because humans suck and will take advantage of your disadvantage. Just sayin.

4. Have friends watch your back - Only be friends with people you can really trust, and let everyone else be merely acquaintance. Telling the difference comes with experience. A friend will drag you out of a bad situation when you are unable to do it yourself. Walk in groups whenever possible, because simians go after the loner. Conversely, don't follow this suggestion to failure on the other suggestions.

5. Watch your friends backs - Because this is the sort of thing friends do. Furthermore, it builds trust with them so they are more likely to watch your back when needed.

I'm pretty sure monkeys and apes don't default to sexual assault.  If they do I don't know why baboon ladies bother showing off their swollen red posteriers to get some.

[LMNO]

Please point to the sections of Kai's post that relate specifically to sexual assault.

[BabylonHoruv]

Aw, you ruined the monkey rape porn in my mind that Kai's post had inspired.  Darn you LMNO