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TIME CAPSULE: Messages to Future Archaeologists

Started by Iason Ouabache, November 23, 2009, 07:47:14 AM

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Iason Ouabache

November 23, 2009, 07:47:14 AM
It is a sad fact of life that everything ends at some point. Including this forum. At some point in the future every single one of us will be dead and there may or may not be Discordians out there to take up our mantle. Either way (barring the world ending in 2012, 2030, or 3100) at some point an internet archaeologist will fire up the Way Back Machine and dig through the pile we are currently making. Will they see us as saints or shit heads? Will our words be considered holy scripture or mental fappery? Whatever the case may be, we should take this opportunity to give them a piece of our minds. What message would you like to send to this future anthropologist who is trying to understand the weirdness that is Discordianism? 
You cannot fathom the immensity of the fuck i do not give.
    \
┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘

The Johnny

#1
November 23, 2009, 09:25:39 AM

If you can read this:

CLONE RESSURECT ME YOU CHEAP BASTARDS
<<My image in some places, is of a monster of some kind who wants to pull a string and manipulate people. Nothing could be further from the truth. People are manipulated; I just want them to be manipulated more effectively.>>

-B.F. Skinner

The Good Reverend Roger

#2
November 23, 2009, 02:02:16 PM
I hate you future fuckheads.  You never come back to visit great-great-grandpa Roger...so fuck you, I'm leaving you a burned up cinder of a planet, and it's more than you fucking deserve.

Assholes.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Triple Zero

#3
November 23, 2009, 02:24:42 PM
dear Future,

you totally had it coming for you.

love,

000
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.

AFK

#4
November 23, 2009, 02:30:14 PM
Baby seals walks into a club....

What?  No humor in the future?  Sucks to be you.  KYSFTB
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Remington

#5
November 23, 2009, 06:41:01 PM
Dear future,

You know how there's a bunch of assholes saying how everyone should go back to the "good old days" of the early 2000s? They're idiots, the past sucks. Have fun terraforming Mars.

-The Past
Is it plugged in?

AFK

#6
November 23, 2009, 06:46:37 PM
Dear Future peoples,

Did you know they named a planet after Eris?  It's true. 

Love,
RWHN
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

#7
November 23, 2009, 06:49:50 PM
Yes, we may appear to be idiotic neanderthals with little or no clue about what's actually happening... but the future will think the same thing about you...


So STFU, n00b.
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

The Good Reverend Roger

#8
November 23, 2009, 06:54:18 PM
You know that river that's on fire?  Yeah, we did that, and we're every bit as sorry as the tards who started that Wales coal mine fire in 1600 that's still burning today.  Is it still burning in the future?  Good.

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

#9
November 23, 2009, 06:55:43 PM
On a more serious note, we should probably tell them how New York City was destroyed in 1955 by Lee Harvey Oswald and his sidekick JFK.  Spiro Agnew tried to stop them, so they wrecked his career in Hollywood.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Dysfunctional Cunt

#10
November 23, 2009, 06:58:37 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 23, 2009, 06:55:43 PM
On a more serious note, we should probably tell them how New York City was destroyed in 1955 by Lee Harvey Oswald and his sidekick JFK.  Spiro Agnew tried to stop them, so they wrecked his career in Hollywood.

:scared:

Roger, you do remember what they said would happen if we told?

The Good Reverend Roger

#11
November 23, 2009, 06:59:34 PM
Quote from: Khara on November 23, 2009, 06:58:37 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 23, 2009, 06:55:43 PM
On a more serious note, we should probably tell them how New York City was destroyed in 1955 by Lee Harvey Oswald and his sidekick JFK.  Spiro Agnew tried to stop them, so they wrecked his career in Hollywood.

:scared:

Roger, you do remember what they said would happen if we told?

That they'd send Daisy around to deal with us.  F Scott Fitzgerald was never known for his forgiveness.  That's why he made such a good politician.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

#12
November 23, 2009, 07:01:58 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 23, 2009, 06:59:34 PM
Quote from: Khara on November 23, 2009, 06:58:37 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 23, 2009, 06:55:43 PM
On a more serious note, we should probably tell them how New York City was destroyed in 1955 by Lee Harvey Oswald and his sidekick JFK.  Spiro Agnew tried to stop them, so they wrecked his career in Hollywood.

:scared:

Roger, you do remember what they said would happen if we told?

That they'd send Daisy around to deal with us.  F Scott Fitzgerald was never known for his forgiveness.  That's why he made such a good politician.

Wasn't Fitzgerald the so called sixth Python?
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

The Good Reverend Roger

#13
November 23, 2009, 07:02:41 PM
Quote from: Doctor Rat Bastard on November 23, 2009, 07:01:58 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 23, 2009, 06:59:34 PM
Quote from: Khara on November 23, 2009, 06:58:37 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on November 23, 2009, 06:55:43 PM
On a more serious note, we should probably tell them how New York City was destroyed in 1955 by Lee Harvey Oswald and his sidekick JFK.  Spiro Agnew tried to stop them, so they wrecked his career in Hollywood.

:scared:

Roger, you do remember what they said would happen if we told?

That they'd send Daisy around to deal with us.  F Scott Fitzgerald was never known for his forgiveness.  That's why he made such a good politician.

Wasn't Fitzgerald the so called sixth Python?

His links to British criminal organizations were never actually proven.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

#14
November 23, 2009, 07:03:20 PM
On a more realistic note, we should probably leave stick figure pictographs.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.
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